Wedding invites for my friends on the unit, do or don't?

Batman25 · Mar 21, 2010

Invite them all. They will appreciate the fact that you think so much of them you'd like them to share in your special day. I know I would be touched.

If you have a shower as well maybe they can split it up and some come the your shower and some to the wedding.

rn4ever? · Mar 21, 2010

I think that if you really are friends with some of your co-workers and you want to invite them, that's fine. But it's already up to them to ask to be off that day. If they cannot make it, at least you invited them.

KB24 · Mar 21, 2010

Invite them if they're your friends and you have a relationship with them outside of work.

I hope no one on your unit feels left out, if they don't get an invite to your wedding.

adlockwood · Mar 21, 2010

Don't feel obligated to invite them all - many will do a shower for you at work, but don't care about coming to the wedding. I had 3 or 4 come to my wedding, and I am delighted they did, but in the long run you don't need to pay for a bunch of people you work with and may never see again once you leave this job (and you will)

RNperdiem, RN · Mar 21, 2010

Are they really friends that you see outside work or are they acquaintances?

If they are friends, by all means invite them. Don't feel the same need to invite the acquaintances; they have a way of saying they will come and not show up if something more interesting comes their way.

RunningRNBSN · Mar 21, 2010

I am getting married later this year and I absolutely did not invite everyone -- I sent invitations to a few people who I am fairly close with. You interact with a variety of different people everyday at work.. you shouldn't have to invite everyone.

Just make sure you send the invite to their home and do hand them out at work. I worked with a nurse who handed her wedding invites out in the hospital (I thought that was a bit un-classy to begin with) and she only handed them to select people.

Kooky Korky, BSN, RN · Mar 22, 2010

Just realize that, whatever you do, you can't win. Someone is going to be hurt. Someone will be amazed and grateful to be invited, someone will be mad and hurt to be left out.

It's different for guys, it seems. We just get married, hardly even tell anyone until it's over. For the ladies, it's a much different scenario. You are doing most of the planning and preparing. I do not envy you this difficult task.

Of course, we guys can't really win, either. If we say that we truly don't have any preference about the size or material or shape or color or the fold of napkins, we get accused of being unhelpful. If we choose seafoam green linen, fan-folded, at the top of the plate instead of to the left, dinner size, we are being difficult.

Oh, God, I wish you well, OP.

Bill E. Rubin · Mar 22, 2010

I wouldn't know, I don't have any friends on my unit. Since that's the case, the things that I have invited people to, I've invited everybody.

RNnbakes · Mar 22, 2010

dont if you only talk with them at work i.e they are only work colleagues.

do if you hang out together outside of work

Pepper The Cat, BSN, RN · Mar 22, 2010

Just a few tips from someone who has been on the left-out side of weddings.

1. If you are only inviting some people - sent the invites to their homes. Do not hand them out at work. There is nothing worse that sitting there and having someone hand out invites to only some of the people present in the room.

2. If you want to show pics of your wedding afterwards, that is fine. But don't show a pic of you and all your "friends at work" to the people at work who were not invited.

3. Don't sit and talk about wedding things with the invitees in front of the non-invitees.

4. When sending out Thank You notes see #1.

Most of us get that you can't invite everyone. Most of us understand that you only want to invite those you are close to. But you really don't need to flaunt this in front of those who are not invited.

perfectbluebuildings, BSN, RN · Mar 22, 2010

Something a lot of people on my unit do is send (to their homes) personal invitations to the people they would really like to be there; and then put up an invitation on the fridge or something in the break room for everyone else to see and as a general invite just in case anyone else would want to come, and send out a general email to ask for an RSVP by a certain date from people @ work. It seems to work out well with no hurt feelings.