Using words like honey, sweety a no-no?

[bee212]

I was wondering if this is a rule for my company or just a rule across the board. We are not allowed to use the words "honey" or "sweety" when we are talking to our residents. Does anyone know why this is? Is it just a dignity issue or what exactly? Our residents have a range of issues such as; dementia and manic depression. It is a long-term care unit..we do have a short-term care unit as well and the same rules apply for those residents. It is only my second week of clinicals and I still have to catch myself using those words. We were warned that if we get caught using those we are fired on the spot. It is going to be a hard habit to break that is for sure. Does anyone have any suggestions?? Thanks for all your help!!

[GadgetRN71, ASN, RN]

It can be very hard not to use these words, but I'm trying. I also try to address pts as Mr./Mrs./Ms. until they say it's OK to do otherwise. I know that I'll be one of those independent elders one day, and I'm sure I'd be ticked if someone talked to me like a child.

[dnp2004]

I am an older person who loves being called "honey" or "sweetie". I don't like being called "Mrs. X" because it feels so distancing. If anyone asked me what I want to be called, though, I wouldn't say, "Call me honey" because it sounds so needy. Guess I am but don't want to advertise the fact. But please if you're younger don't call me "young lady" or sunshine". Now THAT is demeaning.

I am an older person as well who likes to be called sweetie, honey, dear, etc. If you already know my name, I really don't like to be addressed as ma'am because I find that term distancing and clinical. When I am outside of medical and legal settings I never use my titles Dr. or Attorney in my name because I find people are much colder around me and seemingly always "on-guard" with regards to their words and actions.

Yes, the regional differences are important. So important that I don't see how generic rules can apply to the country as a whole. A policy for a Boston facility will not necessarily be appropriate for a Birmingham one because of the way patients may perceive you. Political correctness or not, one shoe does not fit all.

[moosha1]

I let the honey and sweetie slip from time to time, but I am with geri patients and most often I'm responding to being called honey or sweetie. Much prefer honey and sweetie to some other names I've been called.

[LilyBlue]

I TRY not to do it, but sometimes I do. Usually it's in an earnest exclamation, "Oh, sugar, NO you aren't being a burden!" or something like that. I try to use ma'am and sir if I am having to direct the patient to do something or get their attention.

[ToxicShock]

I think its ridiculous to have specific rules set aside for what kind of terminology to use when referring to one's patients. "Sweetie", "honey", and the like can seem condescending to some, and sweet and respectful to others. I think it should depend on what kind of patient/nurse relationship there is - not just some blanket rule for everyone. For example, I feel like an idiot when someone refers to me as "ma'am" or "miss" (I'm 24), whether that's a standard rule or not. I don't care for such formal speech.

I think the nurse or other healthcare provider should ask what the patient likes to be called and/or referred to, and go from there; it should be up to the care giver's discretion. While I think it's ridiculous to have to tip-toe over everyone's delicate sensibilities, I try to respect it in the work place. That respect is extended to ALL ways of referring to a person (sir, ma'am, miss, honey, dollface, sugar cube, etc.) Individual basis only, please!

[baleyja]

It is a rule generally in nursing not to use words of endearment. We nurses work in a close proximity with clients/residents. These words could cause confusion and mixed feelings in the clients.With permission we could call their first name. In most organization it is a policy. However, it is an exception in the paediatric unit. :dncgbby:

[UM Review RN, ASN, RN]

I think it's a regional thing. In NY, when someone calls another person "honey" or "sweetie" it somehow does sound demeaning, but in the South, it sounds warm and genuine.

When in Rome....

[zuzi]

Warm and genuine...there we go ...let's move there then...sweetyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy :heartbeat:heartbeat:heartbeat:D:D:D

[morte, LPN, LVN]

i guarentee that i can make "sir" a "ma'am" sound utterly disrespective, and anything else

quite respectable...lol

dont ever call a nun "ma'am"...lol

and if a patient has an odd nick name, care plan its use (this would be a ltc issue)

[NursEMT-P]

Personally I like it when people call me honey, sweetie, darlin etc.! I HATE it when people who are older then me call me mam, unless its in a joking sort of way. Of course I was raised in the south lol. When I was getting my EMT they also told us not to use them and to say mam/sir/miss instead, so I try to be sensitive to the fact that not everyone likes them and some people thinking it's condescending. But I think it sounds warmer to say honey or sweetie then miss or mam.

[Elvish, BSN, DNP, RN, NP]

I get called ma'am by the kids in the grocery store and it makes me feel so....matronly. Blech. I'd rather be called sweetie any day.

The only male I work with on any sort of daily basis is our unit secretary. He calls all the ladies 'honey'. We all love him.

[Vtachy1]

I LOVE it when people call me hon or sweetie. Its affectionate and endearing, and caring. I do know of a new grad that got fired from a nursing home for using "hon". (oh well, its their loss, and our gain because we got a GREAT nurse) Its SOO wrong! In our ICU, the patients love it when we call them sweet names like that. But I'm old fashioned I guess. Must have too much "south" in me.

Its hard for me to break the habit, but in reality I need to because we may get a new manager in a few years. May get one of those new agey people, with not much common sense.