Using words like honey, sweety a no-no?

[bee212]

I was wondering if this is a rule for my company or just a rule across the board. We are not allowed to use the words "honey" or "sweety" when we are talking to our residents. Does anyone know why this is? Is it just a dignity issue or what exactly? Our residents have a range of issues such as; dementia and manic depression. It is a long-term care unit..we do have a short-term care unit as well and the same rules apply for those residents. It is only my second week of clinicals and I still have to catch myself using those words. We were warned that if we get caught using those we are fired on the spot. It is going to be a hard habit to break that is for sure. Does anyone have any suggestions?? Thanks for all your help!!

[Atheos]

Despite all of our thoughts on this, mine included, in the states I have been in State will and has (I've seen them do it) ding the bejeesus out of a facility for people using terms of endearment. Usually, they find out if the resident is ok with it first meaning all of the 'not there' patients get dings.

I've never seen anyone fired over it but I have seen people told not to do it. Heck, even our DON slips up with it.

[carbaminohemoglobin]

I'm pretty bad at this too. It just comes out! But there are never any complaints.. The residents love me, saying I'm always so nice and sweet to them.. Maybe they like it? I don't go overboard with it.. I mean, there are some people I say it to and others I don't... But I've known most of the residents for awhile.... And I use it as a term of affection.. I love these little old folks!

[carbaminohemoglobin]

Why are 'terms of endearment' wrong? I don't think I understand what the big deal is if the residents are okay with it..

[Bettie P]

I'm reading a lot of "Nobody has ever complained when I called them sweetie!" Just remember that many older folks look at nurses as something of an authority figure, and they were raised to not challenge authority figures. They also might not have the psychological or emotional wherewithal to advocate for themselves by asking not to be called sweetie/honey/etc. We should never place our patients/residents in a position where they have to ask us to be MORE professional. If they invite a more familiar form of address then that's a different story.

[dnp2004]

I think its ridiculous to have specific rules set aside for what kind of terminology to use when referring to one's patients. "Sweetie", "honey", and the like can seem condescending to some, and sweet and respectful to others. I think it should depend on what kind of patient/nurse relationship there is - not just some blanket rule for everyone. For example, I feel like an idiot when someone refers to me as "ma'am" or "miss" (I'm 24), whether that's a standard rule or not. I don't care for such formal speech.

I think the nurse or other healthcare provider should ask what the patient likes to be called and/or referred to, and go from there; it should be up to the care giver's discretion. While I think it's ridiculous to have to tip-toe over everyone's delicate sensibilities, I try to respect it in the work place. That respect is extended to ALL ways of referring to a person (sir, ma'am, miss, honey, dollface, sugar cube, etc.) Individual basis only, please!

I agree, that rule is quite ridiculous and an example of political correctness gone wild. If a 90 year old patient of mine wants to be called honey, dear or whatever, I am not going to insult them by switching to some politically correct approved words . The policy does not take in to account cultural and regional differences of the individual patient. As the Oz nurse wrote on this thread, the term Uncle is used to show respect for an older man. As an older woman, I am frequently called Mother by those in my community, including health care providers. When I am a patient I don't want my CNA, nurse or doctor to start calling me "ma'am". Ma'am is a word I would use when I was trying to control an explosive situation, i.e. Saturday nights in the emergency room:wink2:

[accessqueen]

Never mind about sweetie and honey. I used to work in Miami where the entire Cuban population was "mommy" and "poppy". Young and old and in between. Then I moved to New Mexico, where the Mexican population jsut does not do that, they are much more formal. Sometimes when out of habit I call an older person "poppi", other staff members will look at me quizzically, and say "is that your grandfather????"