This Blows Every Other ED Visit Out of the Water

Published

A new all-time #1 has surfaced for me and my career and I'd like to share...

Young adult male presented to the ED last week with pain and swelling throughout various parts of his body. This kid injected ​multiple syringes of his boyfriend's semen into himself. The worst part? He was trying to get pregnant. Psych cleared him and he was admitted to the hospital. Mind=blown.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in EMS, ED, Trauma, CEN, CPEN, TCRN.

Wow. Reminds me of a patient who used to crush and inject Benadryl into the thighs, but that patient had Münchausen syndrome. Bizarre and sad.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Emergency/Trauma/Critical Care Nursing.
A new all-time #1 has surfaced for me and my career and I'd like to share...

Young adult male presented to the ED last week with pain and swelling throughout various parts of his body. This kid injected ​multiple syringes of his boyfriend's semen into himself. The worst part? He was trying to get pregnant. Psych cleared him and he was admitted to the hospital. Mind=blown.

Oh em gee!! I don't even know what to say about that!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Hospice.

The rabble-rouser in me immediately thought, "Let's hear it for abstinence-only sex ed!"

But in this case, there's obviously a significant super- (or is

it supra-?)tentorial component.

Poor kid.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in hospice.

Even abstinence-only sex ed makes the point that it takes boy + girl. Where did this kid get the idea that injecting semen into his body will get him, a male, pregnant?

I think you should call psych back and tell them they screwed up.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Emergency, Telemetry, Transplant.

Out of curiosity, what did you say to him? I have to admit, I'd have a hard time not laughing in his face…if it weren't so sad.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Sooo I guess his boyfriend must have been into the idea of repeatedly ejaculating into tupperware containers?

I have a feeling there's a psych admit somewhere in the near future for him, too.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ER.

No, no, no. I simply refuse to believe that this actually happened!! If I did, my mind would explode.

The only way this is acceptable is if the guys were, oh, 5 years old, both intellectually delayed, or suffering from shared delusion.

I've heard all kinds of things, like you can't get pregnant on your period, or if he pulls out, or if you douche right away, or is he pees before sex, or if he masterbates earlier in the day.......but dang. I don't know how anyone could think this would make a MALE pregnant.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ninja nursing.

Well this beats all my ED sex toy stories.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Oncology.
Wow. Reminds me of a patient who used to crush and inject Benadryl into the thighs, but that patient had Münchausen syndrome. Bizarre and sad.

What?!?

Up Vote Up Vote ×

What would the Benedryl in the thighs do?

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Emergency/Trauma/Critical Care Nursing.
Sooo I guess his boyfriend must have been into the idea of repeatedly ejaculating into tupperware containers?

I have a feeling there's a psych admit somewhere in the near future for him, too.

Unless boyfriend doesn't know and this guy is getting it from used condoms. I've heard of women doing that to get pregnant when the man didn't want her to.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion