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Seeing the "my arm touched the wall" thread made me laugh and think about the crazy notes I've received from teachers regarding students.
Quick disclaimer: I enjoy everyone I work with and this is not to bash teachers. They are definitely on the front lines and I respect that. I just am sometimes amazed at the magical powers they think I have.
My favorites so far:
"She has rosy cheeks"
"Unsure if it's blood or marker on his hand"
"It's cold outside" (student was in shorts...and completely comfortable in them)
Not a pass, but a student came and said, "My teacher doesn't know what to do about this..." and she showed me a hangnail beside her thumb.
Ummm...put a bandaid over it and ask your parent to take care of it.
WHY do they miss class for things like this??? A lot of times, I feel like I'm more concerned with them missing class than the teachers are!
I did save Halloween once with my stain-lifting skillz.The kid had a nosebleed (an actual legit reason to visit the nurse; I'll take it!) but it was Halloween and he'd gotten blood on his costume, which was not a costume this would have enhanced. (I think he was a yellow M&M or something like that.) I do costuming as a hobby, and so I might have been a little extra sympathetic to this kid's situation...but also wanting to be cool, I pulled out the magic hydrogen peroxide trick and helped him get the blood out almost completely. More than one teacher apparently heard about this and came to me wanting to learn The Magic for their own purposes.
Sometimes we don't have to save lives to be heroes...
I saved picture day for a young lady this same way. Bloody nose all over her white lacy dress. H2O2 to the rescue! She was almost crying she was so happy!
Kid comes in fidgeting around nervously: The mashed potatoes were touching the chicken nuggets. Yep, totally a nursing issue.
What even? What could the nurse possibly do with this? What were they thinking you could do?
My favorite was from a long term sub last year, the note said "rash on face, possible ringworm". Ok. The kid did have a red ring on her face. As I started asking questions about lunch and allergies, I got a wet paper towel and washed her "ringworm" off. It was strawberry parfait from lunch. Yes, I did write that on the note. "not ringworm--strawberry parfait"
Can't make this stuff up.
WineRN
1,109 Posts
"Hit on the cheek with pen"
I asked her if another student threw a pen at her and little one told me no, she was wiggling her pen and it suddenly hit her cheek and her teacher told her to come here...