I recently became the victim of harassment in the workplace, only to watch my nurse manager cater to the physician as he belittled me and used profanity towards me in her presence.
Backstory: Two weeks ago, a surgeon asked me how his patient was doing. I reported to him that she was very weepy during the day and had mentioned being upset with him because she came out of surgery with 3 JP drains and she had not been expecting that. He marched into her room and began yelling at her. He told her she had better change her attitude because he saved her life and he would stop making rounds on her completely if she didn't start thanking him every time she saw him. I was present during this interaction and said This needs to stop. NOW†and walked out of the room. He told me Don't you ever walk out while I am speaking†and walked off. I did report him to my supervisor, but did not make an occurrence report to human resources, which I am now deeply regretting.
Yesterday, this same surgeon told me he was writing up a discharge order for one of the patients. I told him her blood pressure had been running high and rattled off her morning vital signs from my report sheet. I was waiting in line to pull medications from the Pyxis and he asked me when the patient had received PRN medications last. I replied I'm not sure because I'm not in front of the computer, but I've been here since 7am and I haven't given her anything and it's now 8:15am.†He was sitting at the computer and replied me Well log on and tell meâ€. I knew he was trying to throw his weight around, so I replied I am about to pull medications so I can't do that right nowâ€. He became angry and demanded to speak to my supervisor.
While we were speaking to her, he insulted me, called me names, and used profanity towards me. To my absolute surprise, my nursing supervisor kept making comments like Yes, sir. I agree with you sir.†and She will be spoken toâ€. She not once interjected or disagreed with him. I feel that her very attitude serves to only inflate the ego of this physician and makes his behavior acceptable. He literally made me go to my supervisors office and his argument was she didn't do what I told her to do when I told her to do it!â€. After noting that she was just agreeing with everything he said, I said I'm done with this conversation, I have to go take care of my patients†and began to walk out. The physician replied You're a nurse, you don't get to decide when we're doneâ€.
I may be a nurse, but I am also a very real person with very real feelings. His commentary serves to explain his treatment of me. To him, I am beneath him and am even unable to decide when I no longer want to participate in a hostile exchange. I was upset at how he was treating me, but even more upset that my nurse manager did not intervene. The message she sent across is that I may be important, but he is MORE IMPORTANT to the facility because he is a surgeon. My nurse manager was practically agreeing with him that I needed to wait until he ended the conversation.
This lack of support for nurses should be highly frowned upon and should not be tolerated. I may not have gone to school for 8 years, but I do have an education, a mouth, and a brain and I can make my own decisions! I am more than JUST A NURSE. As nurses, we get caught up in patient care to the point that small interactions such as my original encounter with him go unreported. We must stand up for ourselves and our profession and report incidences such as this one to protect ourselves. We can no longer tolerate doctors making us feel inferior or demanding that we stop performing our responsibilities to cater to their needs.
I am now left with only a few witnesses of our original encounter as my ‘proof' and have been ‘fired' from taking care of any of this surgeons patients in the future. I did nothing wrong, but all of his request were fulfilled and I am left waiting the response of human resources, from which I hear, will do nothing. We need to change this and demand to work in environments in which we are valued and supported instead of freely belittled and harassed. Report all of these incidences to protect yourself!
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
Let's discuss the problem solving process:
1. Identify the problem
2. Gather data
3. Brainstorm ideas
4. Choose the best idea
The problem is the Doctor indicated his order was not followed and the Nurse is responsible and now needs to defend her actions.
In documenting the events which transpired has made the intangible tangible. This act of documentation has allowed examination of the events and is something of a therapeutic catharsis, getting facts and perceptions out into the air, so to speak.
One way in which data is gathered is in considering the different viewpoints of the Nurse and various posters. Some say the Nurse acted appropriately, others have critiqued the Nurse's actions as being inappropriate.
The Doctor has deemed the Nurse's actions as being inadequate or inappropriate. Since HR will be involved, the Nurse will need to defend her actions, admit that she was part of the problem, or charge the Doctor with being totally responsible for the problem.
This is a power struggle and a no win situation for the Nurse, for the NM and the Doctor have more power and influence.
This battle may need to be lost, so to speak, in order to win the war, metaphorically speaking.
Also metaphorically speaking, this problem situation could be interpreted as a dance. If they move that way, the Nurse needs to move that way also. Dancing with hostile partners and coming out looking good can be done, but it takes knowledge of the partners, of self (more data gathering), humility, and positive reactiveness.
Positive reactiveness is one brainstorming idea. In this case, it doesn't matter if you win or loose, but how you look playing the game. So, look good playing the game with positive reactions, Funkymiss!
Specializes in Med-Surg, OB, ICU, Public Health Nursing.
It also sounds like MD does not know how to use computer?? Maybe a professional response would be, "Do you need assistance accessing the computer?" (in a total monotone voice)
My facility has them so spoiled. They will literally come into another patients room and stand there and ask you to look things up on another patient! It's a housewide attitude that you, the nurse, provide them with everything .
My facility has them so spoiled. They will literally come into another patients room and stand there and ask you to look things up on another patient! It's a housewide attitude that you, the nurse, provide them with everything .
Not all docs are like this. I have found the attitude more prevalent in surgeons.
Davey has it right on the mark with his "dancing with hostile partners" line.
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
Blame is like worry: it's nonproductive. Yet, the blame thing continues. It's as if only the Doctors or Administrators were better, there would be no problems.
We cannot change another Person, we can only change our perspective. A Nurse's perspective, her feelings toward that Doctor, got her in trouble in the first place. Had the Nurse liked the Doctor, chances are the situation would have not become a problem.
But go ahead and continue the futile endeavor of blame, do not change your perspective, always having to deal with conflict, not gaining a different perspective or a higher level of consciousness.
Specializes in EMT since 92, Paramedic since 97, RN and PHRN 2021.
As a nursing student currently I can o ly imagine how bad you get after the interaction with this jerk. Working as paramedic I have the honor of training and precepting new paramedics. When I deliver the patient to an ER and a doctor comes in for report I allow my student to converse with the physician. Occasionally there are ER attendings who think that everyone is there to cater to them and that everyone is beneath them, not all doctors,some. The ones who are jerks are not used to people who come right back at them after a nasty comment. They have become used to people just accepting ridicule from them because they are the "Doctor". Doctors are people too. They are fallible, they have cracks in their personality and are not perfect.
It sounds like the doctor saw a way to make himself feel better by trying to belittle you, and that is wrong on so many levels.
Blame is like worry: it's nonproductive. Yet, the blame thing continues. It's as if only the Doctors or Administrators were better, there would be no problems.
We cannot change another Person, we can only change our perspective. A Nurse's perspective, her feelings toward that Doctor, got her in trouble in the first place. Had the Nurse liked the Doctor, chances are the situation would have not become a problem.
But go ahead and continue the futile endeavor of blame, do not change your perspective, always having to deal with conflict, not gaining a different perspective or a higher level of consciousness.
I'm so confused by your posts, I can't really understand you or your writing style at all. Are you saying this is basically the OP's fault? Or that it is completely pointless to want to vent about a horrible incident? What in the world does "Had the nurse liked the doctor, chances are the situation would have not become a problem" even mean? How is a nurse supposed to have a positive relationship with an MD who literally thinks nurses are his personal servants? I agree that various parts of this interaction could have been handled differently, but in no way is the majority of the blame to be placed on the OP, IMO. I also understand that MDs will always matter more to an institution because they bring in the revenue, but that does not make any of this right.
OP, I'm really sorry this happened to you. It sounds awful. It's also awful that your nurse manager has shown her true colors and is completely useless and unsupportive. Not all institutions allow MDs to act this way, and most MDs, even surgeons, are not this ridiculous. I'm not sure what the answer is in terms of going forward, as it seems your workplace will not back you up, but I feel for you, I really do.
I don't think anyone is saying it's the OP's fault.
Speaking for myself, I am not.
The doc? He was an ass.
Her NM dropped the ball big time.
That being said, there is a way to handle things when one is in these power struggles, which unfortunately won't be the last. It happens in every work setting, and in personal life, too.
It doesn't mean OP should take abuse. Not at all.
It seemed to become about OP and the doc, and not about the patient, and there are a few of us that saw it that way.
I have long ago learned to handle surgeons. I don't play the games, and we work well together. If the surgeon can't, that's not MY problem, I'm still doing my job.
A Nurse's perspective, her feelings toward that Doctor, got her in trouble in the first place. Had the Nurse liked the Doctor, chances are the situation would have not become a problem.
But go ahead and continue the futile endeavor of blame, do not change your perspective, always having to deal with conflict, not gaining a different perspective or a higher level of consciousness.
This was mostly what I was taken aback by. I appreciate your comments, as always, Farawyn.
Davey Do
10,666 Posts
Let's discuss the problem solving process:
1. Identify the problem
2. Gather data
3. Brainstorm ideas
4. Choose the best idea
The problem is the Doctor indicated his order was not followed and the Nurse is responsible and now needs to defend her actions.
In documenting the events which transpired has made the intangible tangible. This act of documentation has allowed examination of the events and is something of a therapeutic catharsis, getting facts and perceptions out into the air, so to speak.
One way in which data is gathered is in considering the different viewpoints of the Nurse and various posters. Some say the Nurse acted appropriately, others have critiqued the Nurse's actions as being inappropriate.
The Doctor has deemed the Nurse's actions as being inadequate or inappropriate. Since HR will be involved, the Nurse will need to defend her actions, admit that she was part of the problem, or charge the Doctor with being totally responsible for the problem.
This is a power struggle and a no win situation for the Nurse, for the NM and the Doctor have more power and influence.
This battle may need to be lost, so to speak, in order to win the war, metaphorically speaking.
Also metaphorically speaking, this problem situation could be interpreted as a dance. If they move that way, the Nurse needs to move that way also. Dancing with hostile partners and coming out looking good can be done, but it takes knowledge of the partners, of self (more data gathering), humility, and positive reactiveness.
Positive reactiveness is one brainstorming idea. In this case, it doesn't matter if you win or loose, but how you look playing the game. So, look good playing the game with positive reactions, Funkymiss!