The effects of not reporting harassment

[Funkymiss187]

I recently became the victim of harassment in the workplace, only to watch my nurse manager cater to the physician as he belittled me and used profanity towards me in her presence.

Backstory: Two weeks ago, a surgeon asked me how his patient was doing. I reported to him that she was very weepy during the day and had mentioned being upset with him because she came out of surgery with 3 JP drains and she had not been expecting that. He marched into her room and began yelling at her. He told her she had better change her attitude because he saved her life and he would stop making rounds on her completely if she didn't start thanking him every time she saw him. I was present during this interaction and said This needs to stop. NOW” and walked out of the room. He told me Don't you ever walk out while I am speaking” and walked off. I did report him to my supervisor, but did not make an occurrence report to human resources, which I am now deeply regretting.

Yesterday, this same surgeon told me he was writing up a discharge order for one of the patients. I told him her blood pressure had been running high and rattled off her morning vital signs from my report sheet. I was waiting in line to pull medications from the Pyxis and he asked me when the patient had received PRN medications last. I replied I'm not sure because I'm not in front of the computer, but I've been here since 7am and I haven't given her anything and it's now 8:15am.” He was sitting at the computer and replied me Well log on and tell me”. I knew he was trying to throw his weight around, so I replied I am about to pull medications so I can't do that right now”. He became angry and demanded to speak to my supervisor.

While we were speaking to her, he insulted me, called me names, and used profanity towards me. To my absolute surprise, my nursing supervisor kept making comments like Yes, sir. I agree with you sir.” and She will be spoken to”. She not once interjected or disagreed with him. I feel that her very attitude serves to only inflate the ego of this physician and makes his behavior acceptable. He literally made me go to my supervisors office and his argument was she didn't do what I told her to do when I told her to do it!”. After noting that she was just agreeing with everything he said, I said I'm done with this conversation, I have to go take care of my patients” and began to walk out. The physician replied You're a nurse, you don't get to decide when we're done”.

I may be a nurse, but I am also a very real person with very real feelings. His commentary serves to explain his treatment of me. To him, I am beneath him and am even unable to decide when I no longer want to participate in a hostile exchange. I was upset at how he was treating me, but even more upset that my nurse manager did not intervene. The message she sent across is that I may be important, but he is MORE IMPORTANT to the facility because he is a surgeon. My nurse manager was practically agreeing with him that I needed to wait until he ended the conversation.

This lack of support for nurses should be highly frowned upon and should not be tolerated. I may not have gone to school for 8 years, but I do have an education, a mouth, and a brain and I can make my own decisions! I am more than JUST A NURSE. As nurses, we get caught up in patient care to the point that small interactions such as my original encounter with him go unreported. We must stand up for ourselves and our profession and report incidences such as this one to protect ourselves. We can no longer tolerate doctors making us feel inferior or demanding that we stop performing our responsibilities to cater to their needs.

I am now left with only a few witnesses of our original encounter as my ‘proof' and have been ‘fired' from taking care of any of this surgeons patients in the future. I did nothing wrong, but all of his request were fulfilled and I am left waiting the response of human resources, from which I hear, will do nothing. We need to change this and demand to work in environments in which we are valued and supported instead of freely belittled and harassed. Report all of these incidences to protect yourself!

[Here.I.Stand, BSN, RN]

Hugs...it sounds like you did a great job standing up for yourself. Don't get to decide when you're done...um, you just DID. I would absolutely go to HR now with all of this and report this creation of a hostile work environment. I would be looking for a new job too, if nothing else because your manager has demonstrated that she doesn't have your back. Shame on her.

[crazin01]

not much needs to be said you haven't. Awesome job standing up for yourself in a respectable manner and not taking this BS. What a shame your NM doesn't have the backbone necessary to be a good manager that values the nurses. I hope that HR responds appropriately, whatever that may be. Too bad there isn't a way this behavior could be filed against the surgeon and kept in a file on him in the HR department, similar to a hospital employee. Hospitals and such facilities need to realize these docs not only disrespect the other staff, but this one in particular was very rude to the patient and sounds like a jerk. While I don't agree with 'patient satisfaction' being the driving force behind patients choosing different facilities for healthcare, this is a completely different matter. I'd be concerned if this patient doesn't assert herself appropriately or has had other negative interactions with physicians, she may very well shy away from seeking further care, not just from this surgeon & said facility, but healthcare in general. So inappropriate on his end.

Please let us know what happens from HR & awesome job again. Clearly, you were the adult in the situation. :)

[iluvivt, BSN, RN]

You challenged the surgeon and he did not like it one bit. You are correct in that you should have reported his abusive behavior to the pt and and to you at the first occurrence. You are not an employee of his and you were performing your duties of being a pt advocate.Just because he has been granted privileges to perform surgery does not give him the right to behave in this manner and your manager should have told him that you have a professional obligation to provide for the pts that you have been assigned to and follow the hospital policies and not cater to him or his bad behaviour. I think I would have got out of the line and just looked up the last prn given as he requested as that was a legitimate request for information. On the first encounter it is possible that he just lost it and got frustrated with an ungrateful pt looking for a reason to be upset.Who cares if there were 3 drains. ..the surgeon decided she needed them.I think I would have tried a a different approach to change the direction of the conversation and then pulled the surgeon aside. Your supervisor caved and was weak and spineless and should have put him in his place. That is what I would have done. The good thing is that you now know the surgeon has an ego problem and thinks he is better than most and your supervisor is a coward. ..that will help you deal with them in the future!

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

On most parent company websites, you can report this as a compliance/ethical issue. I would do so. This MD is an idiot for sure, but the most important part of this exchange is that the patient was uninformed and treated in a manner in which goes against the very "mission statement" or whatever bru-ha-ha you want to call it. And in your course of advocating for your patient's dignity, you were retaliated against.

Most parent companies also have a system wide corporate level employee relations department. I would also report it to them.

Most facilities are very protective of their money makers. And surgeons are those people. Some surveys have a whole section on MD interactions. If your facility doesn't, it is more than likely due to a "we don't want to know" attitude, and the scores go down which could affect reimbursements.

And remember, HE made it personal. This is work. Swearing and calling you names in his little temper tantrum reflects poorly on HIS character. I personally wouldn't put any more effort into effective communication with this person, as apparently he is unable to do so.

I continued to be shocked and amazed at the lengths management will go through to protect their money makers. My mantra was to let the MD practically get down on the floor and tantrum it out, and stare without emotion, then say "Ok, then, what is it that I need to do for this patient at present". Period.

But cover YOUR butt as well. Report this to every level you can. Including your union if you have one, and your malpractice insurance as methinks that you have not heard the end of it from Jerky Suckfest Ego, MD.

[Davey Do]

Funkymiss, I haven't read anybody else's comments, but I have been in trouble many times throughout my nursing career. I know that it takes two to tango.

The hardest lessons we learn are the most valuable.

I did nothing wrong

Okay.... let's say you didn't act quite as inappropriately as the Doctor did.

The whole thing got off to a bad start. Relaying that the Patient is upset over the outcome of the surgery would be an improvement over saying the Patient was upset because of "him". The Doctor probably took this as a personal attack.

Then, the Doctor was confronted in public. "Praise in public, criticize in private" is a good rule of thumb. And, follow the chain of command in dealing with those we do not directly supervise.

The Doctor may have been behaving badly, but it is not our responsibility to confront a Doctor about his behavior in front of the Patient. It is our responsibility to insure our Patients' well-being; our Patients' well-being is a priority.

I also sense some passive-aggressive hostility by both parties in this relationship; nuances of a power struggle. A hostile environment is never good for healing any wounds, be they physical or psychological.

I could go on, but this is enough to swallow right now Funkymiss, and must be difficult for you to process without feeling attacked or becoming defensive. I know- I've been the victim and the perpetrator in similar circumstances and gained wisdom from those difficult experiences.

I tell you these things because, if the tables were turned, I'd want you to do the same for me.

The very best to you, Funkymiss. I hope it all turns out well.

[Funkymiss187]

I did report this incident to HR. I just wish I had reported the first incident, so it clearly showed his issue with he was personal. My manager is now laughing it off saying she was just agreeing with him because he was yelling and not listening to anything she would have said. Keep in mind, she is 'just a nurse' to him also.

[Funkymiss187]

Davey ,

I think that 99% of nurses would have stopped what they were doing to log in for this doctor, even though his speech and actions were condescending from the forming of his request. This is exactly why nurses are not respected, because we don't respect ourselves. He can ask me for things all day long, but when he says " LOG IN A TELL ME" , or starts with "you're a dumba**" and "are you new? because if you're a new nurse , I'll forgive you. You don't know how this works yet". By 'how this works' he means the dynamics of the doctor to nurse relationship in which he is the boss and the nurse is absolutely nothing and meaningless. It may take two to tango, but I was willing to tango with him in front of a nurse manager that also witnessed his verbal abuse of me continue. We should not be afraid to expect to work in an environment where we are respected.

[Farawyn]

First of all, Ick. I'm sorry this went down like that, and sorry you are angry and stressed.

I'm with iluvit, jade and Davey.

YES, the surgeon was completely out of bounds in the way he spoke to you. You should not be spoken to like that, ever.

What bothers me the most about your part in this exchange (and you do have a part) is you doing the med pass and telling him you'll look up something later. It seems like the power struggle kept happening, while it could have been let go at this point.

He's a jerk. The cursing and all? Established jerk. Many surgeons have that God complex, and you do need to know the animal you are dealing with. It's why I never worked in surgery unless I was floated.

I would have reported the first incident, but documented my butt off going forward. I would have followed what he asked in a reasonable amount of time, with amazing politeness (not being nice, there's a difference) Give them the deadlocked eyes when you speak to them.

I also agree with jade. The hospital thinks the surgeon is more important than you. Than us. It sucks, but it's the way it is. They bring in the $$$.

I like that you spoke privately to your NM. Did you tell her you felt unsupported? I would not exclude her from this. She needs to stand up for her staff.

How long have you been a nurse, OP?

[Farawyn]

Davey ,

I think that 99% of nurses would have stopped what they were doing to log in for this doctor, even though his speech and actions were condescending from the forming of his request. This is exactly why nurses are not respected, because we don't respect ourselves. He can ask me for things all day long, but when he says " LOG IN A TELL ME" , or starts with "you're a dumba**" and "are you new? because if you're a new nurse , I'll forgive you. You don't know how this works yet". By 'how this works' he means the dynamics of the doctor to nurse relationship in which he is the boss and the nurse is absolutely nothing and meaningless. It may take two to tango, but I was willing to tango with him in front of a nurse manager that also witnessed his verbal abuse of me continue. We should not be afraid to expect to work in an environment where we are respected.

Your NM was completely in the wrong by not supporting you.

[noyesno, MSN, APRN, NP]

Way to stand your ground. You handle this guy quite well.

This doc is out of control. Can you write him up (in an incident or safety report)?

Your manager needs to grow a pair.

[Funkymiss187]

I did write him up for harassment . My understanding is he will supposedly be spoken to and that's it.