It's been awhile since we had a stupid nurse tricks thread, so here goes: How to look Incredibly Stupid Without Really Trying:
Call in to work because it's snowed and it's "not worth your life to drive to work on those roads." Be in a bar down the street from the hospital when your best friend at work uses the "Find My Friends" app on her iPhone to check on when her replacement will get there in to relieve her. (Will you lose your job?)
You've got horrible abdominal pain, but you suck it up and come to work anyway. Yay, you! You collapse in your patient's room and are whisked off to the ER by your manager and an RT. You insist that you're infertile and couldn't possibly be pregnant as you're delivered of a full term baby girl. (OK, this one was a CNS and nursing student.)
Call in sick to work because you want to go to your manager's wedding and you didn't win the "get the weekend off" lottery. Catch the bouquet. (And lose your job.)
You're having palpitations, and you're a little lightheaded and slightly diaphoretic. Strangers at the mall are concerned and offer to call an ambulance. You decline, telling them you're fine. Then you think that you probably should go to the ER, but since you know from AN that you won't get a sandwich to eat, you sit down at Bertucci's and order a plate of ravioli. Then you drive yourself to the ER, park at the bottom of a hill and walk uphill to the entrance. You're surprised when the triage nurse takes you straight back. (Yes, that was me. I was fine.)
Tell everyone at work that you're young, you want to have fun, and you're going to a friend's Halloween party after work. Go to the party dressed as a sexy nurse, and be in lots of pictures. Post those pictures on Facebook. Now call in sick to work the next day at 06:50 for your 07:00 shift. You've friended everyone you work with on FaceBook. (And NOT lose your job. What are the odds?)
Steal money from your colleagues' bags in the breakroom. Get caught by a colleague with a black belt in tae kwon do. Be photographed with a 5 foot tall girl flipping you and then sitting on you until Security arrives. (Have your manliness questioned by everyone who sees the pictures.)
So I actually like to think this was a mess-->success but overall it's a great story.
Work PICU. Went to help a coworker with labs. This kid (about 18 mos?) had been stuck multiple times, blew an IV during the day and they were going to give her a break but we needed pre-op labs (they were going to try for an IV under sedation). So we go into the room, night shift, parents are sleeping. I get the blood on the first stick and I'm feeling pretty awesome. My coworker grabs the blood and tubes and took off to send it to lab. I put a gauze on foot but by now kiddo is crying of course and getting pretty wild. I went to pick her up because my coworker, in his haste left the side rail down on the side of the crib he was on. She was flailing around so I didn't trust that I could set her down and get to the other side without risking her falling out. So I picked her up and tried to soothe her. My coworker wasn't coming back and Vocera doesn't ever work if you actually have background noise (screaming toddler within 6 inches of Vocera). Then I had one of those "uh oh" moments. I look down and see that where I poked her in her foot has turned into a bleeder (which didn't help that it's now hanging as I hold her). My leg had a huge spot of blood (had actually soaked through my scrubs as I later found out) and I was standing in a puddle!!!!! So now I'm still trying to call my coworker as I lay kiddo down. I was able to run to other side of crib and put side rails up. Meanwhile I am tracking bloody footprints all.over.the.room! It looked like a murder scene. Keep in mind, lights are still low and parents are still knocked out though starting to stir. I wrapped a blanket around her foot (it was stopping by then) and did a very fast clean up of the footprints. Just in time for the father to wake up and come to bedside. I had just been able to wipe her foot off and slap a bandaid on. He saw the bloody blanket but it wasn't bad. THEN my coworker comes through the door! I told him that they might need to recheck her H/H. Didn't exactly go as planned but I'm so glad the parents didn't see a room of bloody croc prints. :/
The one I remember best is when you're changing the spike on tubing from one bag to another and forget to take the first bag off the IV pole, spilling 500 cc's of saline all over the floor, yourself, the (very alert and oriented) patient, and the patient's bed while you desperately try to figure out whether your should spike the next bag or take off the first bag clumsily with the spike/line in hand, or just drop everything and cry. Then your preceptor, as she tries not to laugh at you, tells you, as punishment, to remake the patient's bed, then leaves the room and proceeds to tell the other nurses what just happened. Totally happened to me on my last semester of nursing school... lols
I am not a nurse, but I would like to share my booboo in my radiation therapy clinic.
When treating a patient they are postioned on the table under the lasers and the treatment head and table are then moved to the specified postion that the prescription gives. This requires at least two therapists, one to move the treatment head and the upward movement of the table, the second to move the table backwards, forwards and sideways with controls on the table.
So, another therapist had the pendant and was moving the table up, while I was at the table controls responsible for backwards, sideways and forward movement. This particular table had status lights, green means the table is locked for treatment and red means the table is unlocked for movement. But, the emergency stop button is also red.
So, I am moving the table with my clinical coordiantor standing next to me giving instructions. The table is moving up, he tells me to push the red button, the one that is unlocked. Instead I pushed the emergency stop, the alarms sounded and the table stopped mid air with the patient on it. Scared the poor patient, and I hear over the alarms my clinical coordinator shouting, "the other red button".
Well, that stopped treatment, we had to restart the machine and let it go through it's cycle before we could begin treatment. So, what was supposed to take 15 min, ended up being 40!!! Set the rest of the schedule behind. Needless to say, I only completed a year of that 2 year clinical. I am sure the therapists were happy I changed my carear objective. Such is life.
First month on my own as a new grad nurse in the ED, I ran over my own foot with the cot, TWICE, in the same shift. Then I proceeded to run over the other foot the very next night! I eventually lost the toenails on my big toes of both feet. Thankfully it was winter and by summer I could wear sandals again.
Holding a bottle of lido for a less than friendly surgeon who is doing a sterile bedside procedure in the ED. He injects the vial with 20cc of air but the top pops off and splashes us both with lido. I looked at him, scared he would start yelling, and the look of confusion was so priceless that all I could do was laugh hysterically. He eventually smiled a little. The patient and I were in tears we were laughing so hard!
While rushing a STEMI pt to cath lab, my stethoscope caught on the rails of the cot (I'm short and the tech helping me rush the pt there was tall, so we had the cot raised quite high). I didn't realize what had transpired since we were moving so fast and in unison down the hallway. However, when the tech went to pull the rail down so we could move the pt over to the table, I was dragged down with the rail and face planted on the floor, still attached to the cot by my stethoscope, in front of all the cath lab staff, including the cardiologist. I wish I could say its the first time I've hung myself on my own stethoscope, but unfortunately, it's not=/
A coworker told me about this one: She walked into MRI and didn't realize she had a watch battery in her pocket. Sure enough, it flew across the room and into the machine. They had to shut it down until they could find/repair it.
It's been awhile since we had a stupid nurse tricks thread, so here goes: How to look Incredibly Stupid Without Really Trying:
Call in to work because it's snowed and it's "not worth your life to drive to work on those roads." Be in a bar down the street from the hospital when your best friend at work uses the "Find My Friends" app on her iPhone to check on when her replacement will get there in to relieve her. (Will you lose your job?)
You've got horrible abdominal pain, but you suck it up and come to work anyway. Yay, you! You collapse in your patient's room and are whisked off to the ER by your manager and an RT. You insist that you're infertile and couldn't possibly be pregnant as you're delivered of a full term baby girl. (OK, this one was a CNS and nursing student.)
Call in sick to work because you want to go to your manager's wedding and you didn't win the "get the weekend off" lottery. Catch the bouquet. (And lose your job.)
You're having palpitations, and you're a little lightheaded and slightly diaphoretic. Strangers at the mall are concerned and offer to call an ambulance. You decline, telling them you're fine. Then you think that you probably should go to the ER, but since you know from AN that you won't get a sandwich to eat, you sit down at Bertucci's and order a plate of ravioli. Then you drive yourself to the ER, park at the bottom of a hill and walk uphill to the entrance. You're surprised when the triage nurse takes you straight back. (Yes, that was me. I was fine.)
Tell everyone at work that you're young, you want to have fun, and you're going to a friend's Halloween party after work. Go to the party dressed as a sexy nurse, and be in lots of pictures. Post those pictures on Facebook. Now call in sick to work the next day at 06:50 for your 07:00 shift. You've friended everyone you work with on FaceBook. (And NOT lose your job. What are the odds?)
Post on AN using your real name for a user name and your real photo for an avatar. Tell everyone who cautions against the same that you would never say anything on AN you wouldn't say in real life. Proceed to insult seasoned nurses who try to give you feedback, complain about the seasoned nurses at your work, call everyone bullies and spout a bunch of ignorant and immature nonsense. (No, that wasn't me. Another poster has that honor.)
Steal money from your colleagues' bags in the breakroom. Get caught by a colleague with a black belt in tae kwon do. Be photographed with a 5 foot tall girl flipping you and then sitting on you until Security arrives. (Have your manliness questioned by everyone who sees the pictures.)
Ruby...you did that? OMG...hilarious...you are just wonderful :))
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
A coworker told me about this one: She walked into MRI and didn't realize she had a watch battery in her pocket. Sure enough, it flew across the room and into the machine. They had to shut it down until they could find/repair it.
RT on a fitness craze was wearing ankle weights for his shift. (God alone knows why -- why would you want to make work more difficult than it already is?) Took the patient to MRI without thinking twice about the ankle weights. Suddenly, RT is airborne, flying right past the patient, nurse and MD and landing with his ankles slammed up against the scanner, above head height. All attempts to remove the weights without removing his pants are fruitless. Patient is laughing so hard he forgets to ask for dilaudid. In the end, RT's pants had to be removed in order to detatch him from the scanner.
That was the day he chose to go commando.
Metal bits from the ankle weights went into the scanner and it had to be shut down for three days.
These are all awesome. Had a newbie at the Pyxis crushing pills. She happen to have the one pt with a trach that could take PO meds. When I asked what she was doing she stated she was crushing the pills so they would be easier going into the trach. And proceeded to tell me whole pills are to big to put into the trach and the pt would choke, all while giving me a look like I was dumb. That would have been very bad.
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OH GAWD...I felt my face go from hilarity to horror slowly but surely...very bad, indeed...
We covered trachs in school...how could someone confuse a trach for breathing, which indicates lungs, with any type of feeding tube? I am sorry, but this really, really disturbed me
RT on a fitness craze was wearing ankle weights for his shift. (God alone knows why -- why would you want to make work more difficult than it already is?) Took the patient to MRI without thinking twice about the ankle weights. Suddenly, RT is airborne, flying right past the patient, nurse and MD and landing with his ankles slammed up against the scanner, above head height. All attempts to remove the weights without removing his pants are fruitless. Patient is laughing so hard he forgets to ask for dilaudid. In the end, RT's pants had to be removed in order to detatch him from the scanner.
That was the day he chose to go commando.
Metal bits from the ankle weights went into the scanner and it had to be shut down for three days.
Got it...never again wearing my weight vest to work...ever...
The one I remember best is when you're changing the spike on tubing from one bag to another and forget to take the first bag off the IV pole, spilling 500 cc's of saline all over the floor, yourself, the (very alert and oriented) patient, and the patient's bed while you desperately try to figure out whether your should spike the next bag or take off the first bag clumsily with the spike/line in hand, or just drop everything and cry.
I've had that happen once to me, except it was a giant bag of penicillin. The patient was on a continuous drip of it. And it had to be changed on my shift. I was frazzled, telling another nurse what admits were coming in and where and just pulled the spike out. And out came the antibiotic.
Then another IV bag story that happened to me...
I went to change a NS bag and changed the bags and tubing correctly. Spiked the new bag, while being able to sneak in without waking the patient up. Only to put the old, opened bag on the pole while holding the new spiked bag. Ended up waking up the patient after drenching her in 50 mls of NS.
In clinicals....had to flush an IV, grabbed the pre-loaded syringe of NS and headed to the room. Decided to push just that little bit out so it didn't have so much pressure in it as I was walking into the room. As I was doing it, someone banged into me from behind...somehow my thumb pushed very hard on the plunger...NS comes out at warp speed and at a fire hose force...yup...right up the back of my instructor and into the side of the face of the physician walking next to her. (me! ughh!)
I stood there paralized and in complete terror. Not a word could I utter. Both turn around very, very, very slowly, look at me (I must have been something to look at..shaking away, nearly in tears, face as white as snow, knees knocking...literally!) and both burst out laughing at me. Thank Heaven both had a good sense of humor.
vintagemother, BSN, CNA, LVN, RN
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