Stop! I don't want someone like you touching me!

Nurses Relations

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Hey I was wondering if anyone has ever been in a situation in which a patient did not want to be treated by you because of your race, religion, culture, etc. and how you handled it. This hasn't happened to me but it has happened to a friend of mine who's an EMT and I figured this can happen to nurses as well.

I had a humiliating procedure this past year. I was thinking of requesting only females present but then I thought about it and figured I should not judge my health care team on their sex. In turn I hoped that the staff would not judge me and be professional.

It turned out that my CRNA was a guy, I was a bit uncomfortable at first but after warming up to him he turned out to be really great. I am young but due to difficult health situations I have had quite a few procedures in the OR. I have had an few anesthesiologists who were cold and unpersonable. I found that in a few of my surgeries the women seemed to be harder to relate to then the men. Maybe the men knew I would be uncomfortable and went out of their way to make me comfortable.

But either way I was happy I let go of my fears and trusted the men in the room. I ended up being really happy I gave them a chance because they all turned out to be really great, supportive, understanding, and caring.

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Specializes in Acute Care, Rehab, Palliative.

Ummm an LVN IS a real nurse. How come nobody has pointed that out?

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Yes, on the telemetry unit I used to work on, we had a Muslim male patient who refused to let females do accuchecks, place telemetry leads, assessments, etc...awfully hard to care for him when we were all female! Thankfully, he was a "walkie-talkie" and didn't require a lot of hands on care.

This is where cultural awareness would be nice.Technically it wasn't you ladies- it was just his culture. For a situation like that, you might want to ask said patient, what to do.

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"Are you suggesting that the care our male colleagues provide to women

is humiliating? Certainly not. A male nurse can place a bedpan just as

well and professionally as a female nurse."

Of course not. But -- "...is humiliating?" Well now, that depends, doesn't?

Maybe yes, maybe no. Depends upon the patient's values, culture, past

experiences, etc. But the subtext of that anecdote seemed pretty clear to me.

Little old lady wants bed pan. Probably female cna or patient tech upset

(justifiably) by the patient's remarks. Explains situation to supervisor.

Okay, we'll get her a "real" nurse for this particular intimate activity,

a male nurse. That'll fix her. Why not spend a minute or two calmly

explaining to the little old lady (1) You've had much experience doing

these kinds of things (2) But if you'd prefer a real nurse, I'll get you

one (3) However, the only real nurse we have right now is a male

(4) So, you can either have the male nurse, wait, or I'll be happy

to help you.

It's called communication.

Quit digging. She wanted a real nurse- she got a real nurse!Yup

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Specializes in LTC, Hospice, Case Management.
Ummm an LVN IS a real nurse. How come nobody has pointed that out?

Because it is off topic. It's not about a LPN/RN war amongst us...it's a perception from a patient that is already being somewhat difficult. It would be no different than trying to get the patient to see that the black nurse or male nurse, etc is able to provide them competent care. Like most others have stated, it's just best to report to a supervisor and move on. Getting defensive about titles in a situation like this does not add to their level of trust.

And before you flame ME, I was an LPN for 19 years before getting my RN.

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Specializes in ED, Pedi Vasc access, Paramedic serving 6 towns.

We have a couple of African American aides in our department and I ahve had a couple of elderly people be less than pleasant to them, but thankfully it is rare!

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*Chuckle* I do believe she got that part..the writer wants to know why no one pointed that out.

(I"m being bad, I know:D)

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I had a bad experience with a male doctor, so I have used a female OB/GYN since then. I feel more comfortable with a female, personally. I was engaged when I went to a new doctor for a physical and I also said I wanted to start birth control. (Keep in mind I was already engaged, and not a child). The male doctor whipped out a bible and proceeds to tell me I'm going to go to hell and that I just want birth control to be a whore. He also gave the exam with the door open. He didn't take a family history or check anything except the pap smear, without a nurse present. (I'm pre-nursing, so I don't know the rules about that, but I know HIPAA was violated when he left the door open after I asked for him to shut it.) He basically chucked the Rx at me while I sat there crying and stunned, and made me wait for 5 hours. I took the pills for a few months, and started having excruciating pain in my calves, so I feared clots, which was in my family history. I have only been with my husband, and this doctor tells me he just wants to sleep with me and leave me. Sooo, I've had a female doctor since then. I will go to male doctors, but if they have to go down under, the doctor has the be female. They seem to be more gentle with certain procedures too. I have faith in all races/sexes etc., it's just a matter of my preference for personal procedures like an OB/GYN visit.

It would bother me to be considered inferior to a male nurse, but I would try to remember that maybe this pt. is simply more comfortable. There is no excuse for the racial prejudice though.

I think the older generation has more problems with the racial issue, expecially in the south, where I live.

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Specializes in Geriatrics, Home Health.

I'm a Black nurse in a very White state. The closest I've come to having a patient refuse me was when I worked at a nursing home. A resident who had been in my hall went to the hospital, then came back. When he was readmitted, he went to a different hall, and a sheet at the front of his chart said "Caucasian caregivers only." Funny, he didn't have a problem with the Filipina nurse on that side.

I didn't take it personally. He was old, and he wasn't going to change. His bigotry was his problem, and I wasn't going to make it mine.

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Thanks for the replies its good to hear that this isn't an overly common occurance.

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Specializes in LTC, Hospice, Case Management.

It is now illegal in my state for a patient to refuse a caregiver based upon race & that's a good thing. On the other hand, if a patient doesn't want me to take care of them, I'd rather just stay far away. Why beg for trouble.

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Specializes in Rehabilitation, MICU.

I did have a patient refuse for me to take care of them one time because I "looked" too young and they wanted an adult to give them meds and not a high school kid. She actually thought that I was part of some high school shadow program. OMG!!!! I had been out of nursing school for a year at this time. I just had to laugh and let my charge nurse know so I could be switched!

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