Stop! I don't want someone like you touching me!

nerdtonurse?, BSN, RN · Mar 14, 2011

wow...where ever you live i dont want to be a patient there....threatening a patient with retaliation is abuse, and may i add....IT IS ABUSE IN EVERY STATE!!!.....your friend doesnt deserve her nurses license...and if i knew who she was...id report her myself!
its sad this is what nursing has come to.....

The pt didn't suffer...she was using her own narcotics brought in by friends, far beyond the pittance ordered, and was in for non-existant "chest pain" brought on when she was about to be arrested for beating her kid half to death. And she was discharged into the hands of the local cops. Far as I know, she's still in jail, as her child later died from the injuries.

And the nice guy I had was threatening to have his friends "meet me after work" because I wouldn't go to the local liquor store for him. The high number of people like these two in that area are one reason I left that hospital.

It's easy to judge when you don't know the whole situation or walked in our shifts.

chapstickaddict · Mar 14, 2011

I was taken very good care of by a male LPN in the ICU of a local hospital in recent years. He even had to put me on the bedside commode ( I was connected everywhere by lines and IV's) and wipe my sorry butt. He was professional, concerned, patient, and respectful. It was a very good experience especially for me as the patient who was scared to death to be in ICU. The color and or ethnicity of the nurse, whatever kind...be it CNA, Student, LPN/LVN, RN doesn't matter when you're really sick. I would not disrespect a patient for their request...and that has happened to me in the past. However, I don't think CNA's should be so sensitive that a request for a "real nurse" should upset them. I think sending in the male nurse to that poor older female patient was down right nasty...just sayin '.

I thought the poster in that exact situation was an LPN?

Forgive me if I'm wrong and misread. Personally, I think it would have been less mean-spirited if the situation had been explained to the woman, like someone mentioned earlier. I don't know what the actual situation was, though, so there might have been something else going on where only that male nurse was available?

NrsHollyRN · Mar 14, 2011

That sounds like a very disturbed, inappropriate, unprofessional individual. None of the male OB/GYNs I've known have EVER done anything like that. He needs to be reported to the state medical board!

Fribblet · Mar 14, 2011

this isn't digging, what this "supervisor" did is called abuse
really people....we need to go back and relearn our core values about nursing and how we are supposed to care for the whole person...including the ones that happen to have a buttholish streak :)
if she had been a supervisor in my facility...she would have been fired!

You're being absurd. The patient wanted a "real" nurse. The patient was given a "real nurse." There is no abuse. No one hit the patient or insulted her. She wanted a "nurse" to place her bedpan, and a "nurse" did. Now, had they gotten the janitor to do it, then that would have been abuse.

I have had male patients enjoy my care a bit too much. I've had a male patient say, as I was about to place a foley, that "we could continue this later if you want." (And, FYI it was not meant as a "let's stop and continue the procedure at a later time.") I stopped what I was doing, threw away the foley tray, covered the patient back up, and got the biggest male nurse working to go in and do the foley for me.

I suppose I would be fired at your facility? Absurd.

OldNurseEducator · Mar 14, 2011

I thought the poster in that exact situation was an LPN?
Forgive me if I'm wrong and misread. Personally, I think it would have been less mean-spirited if the situation had been explained to the woman, like someone mentioned earlier. I don't know what the actual situation was, though, so there might have been something else going on where only that male nurse was available?

I certainly hope that was the case. I had an LPN once tell in shift report that she wouldn't answer the call light of the patient with severe mental and physical disabilities because every time she called, she wanted the commode...so, she went on to say IN SHFT REPORT TO MY GROUP OF PN STUDENTS AND THE REST OF THE STAFF, that she was..."punishing" the patient. That's very abusive and it embarrassed me in front of the students to hear this from a graduate of our nursing program. (She had a questionable attitude as one of my former students, but was acceptable.) Let's no try to cover up someone else's mistakes. :twocents:

HeartsOpenWide, RN · Mar 14, 2011

NO, we are pretty liberal in my part of the country. But when we had a male nurse come down from Med-surg to help us out he ended up doing "chores" because no one wanted a male nurse. (which I don't get because three of the 7 providers that deliver for our department are males; maybe they feel that they build a relationship with these men during the course of their pregnancy but don't want a male nurse they have never seen before))

Conqueror+, BSN, RN · Mar 14, 2011

I am a tall, black, Christian female who graduated at the ripe old age of 20 and I have had pts refuse me for all of the above plus some really strange reasons I never thought I would hear. I had one lady refuse me because I was black. NOT because she didn't want a black nurse per se, but because she thought it was the 1940's and "they don't hire colored nurse here and their trying to pawn an aide off on me because I'm poor". I couldn't stop laughing long enough to get angry. Its just life and you can't absorb that stuff into your spirit. It'll make you crazy. I just take care of the patients fortunate enough to receive care from me.

megan_EMT · Mar 14, 2011

Anyone else get questions about their age? I look super young and people are always asking where the adult is when I respond on EMS calls. The high school truancy officer even stopped me the other day because I was obviously cutting school (at 24...).

Conqueror+, BSN, RN · Mar 14, 2011

You'll appreciate this when you're 40 :)

megan_EMT · Mar 14, 2011

Haha! I already appreciate it! I love it everytime I get carded at the liquor store (and my friends don't). My mom got carded (seriously, not as part of we id under 99) until she was 39...I'm hoping to beat her!

orthonurse55 · Mar 15, 2011

"When I was an LPN a patient rang her call light and I answered it. She told me she didn't want me because she wanted a REAL nurse, not someone who was either too stupid or too lazy to go to college. I was very upset and went to tell my charge nurse. Well, she handled it very well - she sent in a male nurse we had. HE was a REAL nurse. And that little old lady just wanted the bedpan!!"
Handled it very well? I'd call that retaliation, getting even, sticking it to that "little old lady." I'm not defending the attitudes of some difficult patients, but that seemed a deliberate attempt to embarrass, even humiliate the woman. Hey, if that's considered handling it well, then, at least you're up front about it.

It wasn't "retaliation". We didn't even know what the woman wanted. I was too "stupid" for her to talk to.

Cul2 · Mar 15, 2011

Is there a connection between these two quotes found on this thread?

“If I have a choice I'd prefer a female doctor because they've been through the procedures, and tend to use more appropriate language.”

“I've had a male patient say, as I was about to place a foley, that "we could continue this later if you want." (And, FYI it was not meant as a "let's stop and continue the procedure at a later time.") I stopped what I was doing, threw away the foley tray, covered the patient back up, and got the biggest male nurse working to go in and do the foley for me.”

As far as the first quote goes, the same could be said of a female nurse or doctor putting a foley into a male patient -- as may be exemplified by the second quote. Some patients, embarrassed and feeling lack of control, may speak inappropriately. I’m not excusing it, but that’s just the way it is. But, frankly, this is about professionalism and empathy and communication. Yes, the right language is important. But both males and females with the right skills can empathize and communicate effectively with the opposite gender and help them feel comfortable with the situation. .

I agree, it is difficult on the web to consider all the contexts with any situation description. As the the poster wrote: “It wasn't "retaliation". We didn't even know what the woman wanted. I was too "stupid" for her to talk to.” All I can do is read what’s written and extrapolate, interpret what I infer. I could be wrong. But it’s still a communication problem that may or may not have a solution. I’m not saying it’s necessarily the nurse’s fault. But I do stand by my original interpretation based upon what I read.