So I might not get to start nursing school afterall...

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So I have finally been accepted into a program that I can afford. But now I am faced with a issue about child care. While struggling to do my prereqs I worked part time and took out loans to pay daycare for my daughter. I do not qualify for state funding because my ex wont get his car out of my name and would not watch her so I had to get a loan to pay daycare. He had been saying all summer he would watch the kids (we now have two) while I am in school and working part time. Well yesterday he told me he is not going to watch his kids while I go to school because it will not be worth it money wise! He works from home as a computer programmer and web designer so his schedule is totally open! My classes start Monday and I have no clue what I am going to do.

I have talked to the school financial aid office and tried to figure out additional funding for daycare but since I now have two kids there is no way to get a loan big enough to cover the cost. In one year our oldest will be in pre school then I could afford to send the baby to daycare with loan money. I have called DSHS and they will not help with daycare funding unless he gets his cars out of my name, he now has several of them.

I can't believe I am on this public form at four in the morning asking for help on how to get daycare paid for for my kids. If I don't figure out something by Monday I am going to have to drop the program since if you don't show up the first day your spot goes to someone on the waitlist. The school only admits once a year so it's not like I can deffer until January. There are a few schools in my state that have classes that start Winter term but the only community college is a lottery where only 25 out of hundreds of applications get in!

I think my only options is to move back to Cali and live with my parents and try to go to Cal State Fresno or Stanislaus State or one of the community colleges in between the two. Because then my folks would watch my kids for free. But I'm almost thirty years old and have not lived with my parents since I was a teenager so I would feel really silly reverting to that.

:heartbeatall of you for reading my four am can't sleep because I'm panicking vent!

Specializes in N/A.

I lived in San Francsico for 15 years. You might want to check out this link. If those cars are in your name and someone else is driving them and you no longer own them..... YOU are still legally responsible for the car and can be held liable for whoever has possession of them having an accident unless you have transferred title. http://dmv.ca.gov/vr/topbuysell.htm A transfer of names on the title must be done. There are release of liability, etc... that have to be filled out and as the cars are in your name YOU must be the one to sign.... unless he has Power of Attorney. You are required to notify the DMV of change of ownership within 10 days and transfer fees must be paid within 30. Report the vehicles stolen if this has not been done. Chances are....if no proper paperwork was done to change title ownership, no bill of sale changed hands either....so it will be up to the buyer to prove they bought the vehicle. Sorry to rant!!! What this Mr. Jerky McJerkface is doing to you makes me angry! I agree with MInurse.st. Get them back and resell them. Play hardball!!! :mad:

PS - Why did he buy a car with expired tags? The previous owner should have brought the registration and smog certification up to date. Someting is not on the up and up here.

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If the registration is in your name but you don't have the car, you can walk into your local tag office and sign a paper to have the tags canceled. I had an ex- who had a truck registered under my name. He took off with the truck and told me he would mail the tags when he got settled in his new state so I could drop the insurance which was also in my name. He would not return the tags, so I went to the police to ask and they told me go to the local tag office. It was a quick process. I just signed that I did not have the tag and wanted to cancel the registration.

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Specializes in Pediatric Home Care, Dr Office/Clinic.

I think you should swallow your pride and ask your family for help. Even if it's just temporarily until you can sort all this out. I definitely don't think you should NOT go to nursing school because of this jerk. Some how any way get to school that first week with friends and family help pull all the favors you can. You'd be amazed how people will step up to help once they know you really need it. You just have to ask and then don't look back. You've gone to far to drop this dream.

Please let us know what ended up happening?

Thanks!

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If I can put my :twocents: in, if I were you I would sell "YOUR" cars and utilize the money to pay for childcare until you can find another option. That is horrible that he's deciding to do this now, you can and will rise above this.

Keep us posted and GOOD LUCK!

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If it were me, I'd report the cars stolen, then I would either sell the cars (it might take a while to get a buyer and them out of your name though) or just give them away (just to get back at him and make him upset lol).

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i agree with all of the above. if you need fin aid and the cars are holding you up then try to cancel the registration. if that wont work have the cars repoed or report them stolen. Sell those suckers and happy nursing. If he is going to make life hard for you then give him what hes giving you.... a dang hard time! ps.... selling a car and not releasing it to the new owner (keeping it in ur name) is illegal. Doesnt matter that this new guy paid for the car... its still legally yours as long as ur name is on it. You could get in it and drive away and there is nothing anyone could do about it.

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If the vehicles are in your name take possession and sell them.

Or, google Department of Motor Vehicles and get the release of interest form(s) and fill them out. It should be the same form that is used (when you sell a car) to notify DMV that you're no longer responsible for the vehicle and who the new owner is. The State will force him to register them in his own name.

It irritates me to no end when parenting is referred to as babysitting, a parent doesn't babysit their own child(ren). It sucks that he's given you such short notice but I can see his point, the majority of work from home parents that I know have to obtain childcare for the kids so they can actually work.

Is he paying child support? If not file for it, it's money your children are entitled to.

Whether or not you're getting support take the issue to your State's child support enforcement office. If he can't or won't parent his kids while you are at school then he can pay his fair share of the daycare costs.

Doesnt matter that this new guy paid for the car... its still legally yours as long as ur name is on it. You could get in it and drive away and there is nothing anyone could do about it.

You're also liable for any accidents or damages as long as the cars are in your name. If he has any sort of accident while driving a car in your name, YOU are responsible. YOU are the person who will be sued, not him.

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See if your family will help out, in lieu of you living with them. I am married, but my husband travels a bit, so I am always looking for babysitters, etc... My parents have given me $$ towards this. Even if we are late on other bills, the babysitting cash stays in an envelope, not to be touched. I know not everyone has this kind of assistance, but it may be worth it to your parents, to see you in school working towards a career and a potential income! My kids are in school, which helps, but I do need before and after school care.

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Specializes in None yet.
If the registration is in your name but you don't have the car, you can walk into your local tag office and sign a paper to have the tags canceled. I had an ex- who had a truck registered under my name. He took off with the truck and told me he would mail the tags when he got settled in his new state so I could drop the insurance which was also in my name. He would not return the tags, so I went to the police to ask and they told me go to the local tag office. It was a quick process. I just signed that I did not have the tag and wanted to cancel the registration.

So it's a bit more complicated here. I went to the department of liscensing and explained what was going on but they could not get my cars out of my name unless I gave them the VIN and plate numbers which of course are on the paperwork that my ex has! So I had to file a request with the department of disclosure to get the VIN and plate numbers of all the vehicles in my name. However I was told that this can take four to six weeks! Hopefully it will be on the quicker end of things and I will only have to foot the bill for a month of daycare.

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Specializes in SICU, TICU, CVICU.

VIN numbers are etched into windshields or are found on the inside of the door... make up some reason why you need to get into the car and write it down...

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You may not qualify for state funding but definitely you can get student loans. Those student loans you will have to start paying off six months after you are out off the school. You can get up to $9000 per year. As you see there is a solution. All you have to do is go to your Financial Office and fill out papers.

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It sounds like the best option is to defer school for now and move back with your parents in CA. If your parents can offer reliable child care such that you'll have a lot less student debt when you graduate, IMO it's worth it to make that temporary sacrifice and move back with them for a few years. It will put your mind at ease to know your children are cared for by your parents, that you have a place to live rent-free, and hey the kids might even have a great experience getting to know their grandparents!

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