Sick of all of the bullying.

[ANH_RN]

I just have to get something off of my chest.. I have been guilty of talking about other people behind their back but I am downright shocked at the amount of bad mouthing that goes on in my hospital on my floor. Is it like this everywhere? Seems like certain few nurses just complain about everyone they come in contact with. If it isn't the aides, it's other nurses, or pharmacy... etc. Last night a few nurses (one of which I have a lot of respect for unfortuneately) were talking so bad about one of our aides. I just can't even believe how rude they are to this particular aide. Now she may not be my favorite person in the whole world but I could not bring myself to talk about her and her intelligence endlessly in public view for anyone to walk up on. These same people that are having their livelihood put down have children and husbands and wives. I am not the most positive person in the world and I am very guilty of complaining especially when times get hard but to put down others' as a person just seems so inappropriate. Sometimes it's so bad and towards just anyone that I often think to myself 'jeez what do other people say about me?' I hate working in this.. I hate having to listen to it. Is it really like this everywhere??? I just always attributed it to the high stress nature of the job but it just seems unacceptable. Now I admit there are people that make me mad and frustrated and I vent from time to time about them but this is downright bullying! We don't let our kids do it, we shouldn't either especially as professionals in a professional environment.

And just listening to everyone else's rant and rave makes you more aware of yourself and how you sound when you complain. I have been making a more conscience effort to not complain a lot especially about other people.

[glencovediva]

Just tune the gossips out, and walk away.

[greatshakes]

Sometimes I think negative people just drown you too. I actually hated going to work when I was a AIN because one girl wasn't ******, actually she was very good to me at the start and actually showed me the ropes properly. When I was studying she'd make remarks about wanting to be an RN so I invited her to go to uni with me and she'd be able to handle it as she had a lot of good sense but that was no go but she'd have a crack at my going for a degree which I had as though I was pulling rank on them. I heard from others she just dragged the whole wing down and made shifts feel even longer. You didn't know if you would have a good day or a bad day. I 've never had time for mind games. At least the devil you know doesn't keep you guessing.

[tra10]

You are not the only one. I have never been acused of been a bully until now. I just tell people to do their job. This PC world is tuff to live in when you want poeple to work as hard as you are.

[linearthinker, DNP, RN]

How is that bullying?

What you are describing is simply gossip, catty, immature and unprofessional behavior. Frown, and walk away. They will get the point.

[meish]

Honestly, bullying can never be eliminated. It's part of who people are and what they intend to do--to bring other people down. It's really frustrating and pretty disgusting. But hey, don't forget that karma's a b****. I strongly believe in that. That's why whenever I'm in my clinical (I'm a fourth year nursing student now), I just shut my mouth inside the workplace.. and rant outside the hospital, a way of de-stressing the disgusting gossips and bullying inside the unit.

[ANH_RN]

How is that bullying?

What you are describing is simply gossip, catty, immature and unprofessional behavior. Frown, and walk away. They will get the point.

I think of bullying as putting down a person on a personal level not just how they do their job. They also act out their aggression to their face and are not polite. I see that as being a bully. And it's not always just that one person, it's a lot of people. No one seems safe. Everyone talks crap about everyone.

[linearthinker, DNP, RN]

Bullying is abusive treatment, the use of force or coercion to affect others, particularly when habitual and involving an imbalance of power. What you are talking about would be better termed as "bad manners."

We told you how to handle it. Good luck.

[wanderlust99]

me too:( I went home sick one day, and apparently everyone thought I was faking it and were talking crap about me...but yea, I was admitted to the hospital & had surgery. I hope they feel bad now:) I hate people.

[ANH_RN]

Bullying is abusive treatment, the use of force or coercion to affect others, particularly when habitual and involving an imbalance of power. What you are talking about would be better termed as "bad manners."

We told you how to handle it. Good luck.

I had already planned on handling it just how you 'told me' to. Thanks.

[CFitzRN, ADN]

What irks me are the ones that run to the manager and complain about any vent you may have had, because you are considered a peer as an RN and they are a CNA. Yet, they complain all-the-time.

That happened to me. I had a vent against a CNA that told a family 'Grandpa was going to die', when they hadn't been told the prognosis. I had to spend an hour with the family doing customer service. All I wanted to do was kick the CNA in the A$$ for her comment. I vented in the breakroom in front of another CNA who is a friend. Another CNA walked in the breakroom and caught the tail end of the rant and ran to the manager. You can bet I don't say a word about anyone. I sit and stew while everyone else vents away. It can be frustrating.

I totally get the frustration of that situation, but what you did was gossipy and ultimately not helpful. Had you asked that CNA to step aside with you, in a place with privacy, and calmly explained to her why what she said to that family was counterproductive, it may have actually prevented another similar situation from occurring, and would have shown your character and integrity. By "venting" to other people, it just perpetuates a climate of gossip and negativity. Whoever said that assertiveness is the key was spot-on.

[anotherone, BSN, RN]

Probably is like this everywhere. It has been like this in every type of job I have had. Except this is the most stressful and that probably makes people even more inconsiderate/bullies and crazier than they would be in another type of situation. I dunno. I have seen these types of people in all types of jobs not just nursing. office work , retail, restaurants, etc

[eriksoln, BSN, RN]

Probably is like this everywhere. It has been like this in every type of job I have had. Except this is the most stressful and that probably makes people even more inconsiderate/bullies and crazier than they would be in another type of situation. I dunno. I have seen these types of people in all types of jobs not just nursing. office work , retail, restaurants, etc

My mom used to manage a school cafeteria. She always said "Stress makes people lose their common sense." I've found myself remembering that a lot lately.