Siblings sharing a room

LoneCowboy · Nov 19, 2012

Depending on their origins, it may be perfectly acceptable culturally to share the same room especially if their primary motivation is education and shared expense and not procreation.

sharpeimom · Nov 19, 2012

My grandmother was eldest of 10 children. All but one lived well into their nineties. Most married but two remained single. Ultimately, the day came when three siblings could no longer live alone. They all moved

into one large two bedroom unit. Within six months (or so,) one sibling died.

The two survivors had to go before a review board to be allowed to remain together, since they were brother and sister. The extended family thought it was silly since they were 96 and almost 95 at the time. They lived in that two bedroom suite until Uncle ___ died, then Aunt ___ was moved into another room with a roommate.

If a suite weren't available, I would have no objection to a room with curtains between the beds.

dirtyhippiegirl, BSN, RN · Nov 19, 2012

Why on earth would you assume that incest is the reason that opposite-sex siblings would want to share a room?

Each1Teach1 · Nov 19, 2012

I agree. Most of us don't want to share a room with a stranger and if in the event another family member needs care as well, why not share a room with them? We can't make assumptions like that.

sharpeimom · Nov 19, 2012

The review I mentioned above was to be sure Aunt ___ didn't feel "responsible" for Uncle___'s ultimate care, since she had cared for her family and a dying husband, and was the mother hen type.

I wondered the same thing dirtyhippiegirl wondered. I think a curtain between beds is necessary no matter who the roommates happen to be.

On a more humerous note...

Another two sisters from the same family ended up in the same facility. One older and one younger. Older had married, had children, taught school, volunteered, etc. Younger never married, went to med school, and spent four and a half decades in Africa as a medical missionary. Older had lived a very frugal life and had learned to pinch every cent.

When Auntie ___ retired and decided to move into the "home," the entire family held its collective breath. :nono:

The home decided that since they were sisters, they should want to share a suite. :no: It worked for all of three weeks! The capper was when someone from church asked Aunt ___ how Auntie ___ was adjusting to life in the Assisted Living Facility. Her answer? "That ___ got so lazy while she was in Africa that she won't even rinse out her own undies!":roflmao: (At age 89, too. Silly Auntie!!)

CapeCodMermaid, RN · Nov 20, 2012

Why on earth would you assume that incest is the reason that opposite-sex siblings would want to share a room?

Because they've been seen kissing eachother in what NO ONE would consider a brotherly/sisterly kiss.

Nascar nurse, ASN, RN · Nov 20, 2012

Because they've been seen kissing eachother in what NO ONE would consider a brotherly/sisterly kiss.

Oh ick! Up until this above post I was confused why you seemed to be making a big deal about something I would otherwise think you would see me as no big deal.

In my 80's or 90's I really would rather have my brother as my roommate as opposed to any stranger. Of course I would want that privacy curtain and a bathroom door. The nurses would still be having fits about our inappropriate behavior...but that would be because we were throwing things across the room at each other (all in good fun of course).

Nascar nurse, ASN, RN · Nov 20, 2012

Oh ick! Up until this above post I was confused why you seemed to be making a big deal about something I would otherwise think you would see me as no big deal.
In my 80's or 90's I really would rather have my brother as my roommate as opposed to any stranger. Of course I would want that privacy curtain and a bathroom door. The nurses would still be having fits about our inappropriate behavior...but that would be because we were throwing things across the room at each other (all in good fun of course).

As to your situation...not sure what you could/should do. Is there other family members involved that could talk them out of this. There behavior is sick but is it actually against the law - I don't know?

MotherRN · Nov 20, 2012

What age range of siblings are we talking about here?

grownuprosie · Nov 20, 2012

1) Assuming your implication about your perception is true, Nurses are not police. It is not in the nursing scope of practice to enforce laws except for certain mandatory reporting situations. Unless the relationship is non consentual, you are not really in a place to stop it or even report it.

2) What does this have to do with gay people? People who are gay are by definition are the same gender as their partners, so same sex roomates would not be an issue. It is significantly different than incest, BTW.

3)what is your plan? If you decide to deny their request, what will you say? How will you justify separating siblings when i assume there is no concrete rule in your facility against it? "I think you are too affectionate with each other. Is grosses me out. So, you will spend your days with strangers as punishment."

tewdles, RN · Nov 20, 2012

I dunno...

At the risk of sounding odd, my brother and I have a very close relationship. When we see each other we hug, hold hands, and a kiss full on the lips wouldn't be out of the ordinary. That is not a sexual thing for us...ugh...but it is very affectionate.

I would totally rather share a hospital room with my brother than with a stranger. I haven't seen him naked in over 50 years, but at least if there was disruption of modesty with him I could point and laugh.