I currently work as a CNA in a LTC/Rehab nursing home, but I have to share with you the few incidents and occasions when I have witnessed sexual harassment towards male employee's in my facility.
First incident occurred when a male nurse working the daytime shift was trying to get buzzed into the building. I work noc shift, and the building doesn't really open up until 6:30 am. A fellow CNA walked up to the surveillance camera to identify who was at the door, she noticed who it was, pressed the speaker button and said "Come on in, sexy!". I only overheard the comment that she made, and it made me feel uneasy... even though her comment wasn't towards me. This nurse was the temporary rehab 7-3 am unit charge nurse. I was kinda expecting him to say something to this girl, but it looked as if he just went with it. It is so obvious this girl crushes on him, she practical drools whenever he is within six feet of her.
Second incident occurred when a PCA was watching a high-fall risk resident of mine during the night. Before the night shift began, he wanted to excuse himself to use the bathroom. Before he reached the restroom, a CNA co-worker of mine stopped him and said "It is good to see you. It is always good to see a young, strong, handsome man like yourself." She said this, all the while slowly caressing his arm up and down. He showed a look of disguist on his face... same as I. I was pleased to hear him say "When a man sexually harasses a woman, all hell breaks loose. But when a woman harasses a man, nobody pays it any thought."
Next a recent incident occurred. The daytime shift was beginning to start. A male CNA arrived about ten minutes early to gather linen and supplies to start his day. As another 7-3 am CNA walked by, she loudly screamed "Heyyy, lover boy!" The look on her face was appalling. She looked at this gentleman like a dog to a big, juicy steak. I felt embarrassed for her. Yet at the same time (although her comments weren't made towards me) I wanted to confront her, and remind her that her language is inappropriate... but thought it wise to keep my mouth shut.
What do you think I should have done? Should I have confronted my co-workers about their comments? Would you have, and if so, how would you phrase it? I regret now not saying anything. It seemed that on the first and last incident I described, the male co-workers just brushed their comment aside as if it didn't phase them. But that is still no excuse for the co-worker using the unprofessional language. This question is towards males of the nursing profession: Have you ever been sexually harassed? If so, what were your actions? What would you say or do in cases like these?
I would say, for me, if I heard it maybe one time during my shift and it was all in good nature, I would say most wouldn't even think twice. Eventually, depending on how big the staff is and how long you've worked their I imagine you get to make pretty good rapport with your coworkers and get away with saying things like that.
I'm just curious, does your employment company offer a policy against sexual harrashment?
Do I think it's completely unprofessional? Not really, cause we generally go back to doing our tasks for the day and it's a one time deal.
Are you 100% that the remarks and comments are a 'one time deal'?
If I witnessed what I perceived to be sexual harassment towards a peer I would take them aside and ask them if they were uncomfortable.If so then I would offer my support as a witness and encourage them to go forward through the chain of command to report it.Then for me it ends there.If the guy didn't feel harassed then it's none of my business.
I appreciate your advice on supporting myself as a witness if any of these gentleman decided to speak up about the manner. Although the 'comments' were not made towards me, I got the impression that the victim of the harrashment was not the only target of the offense here, because I was effected by the inappropriate language and behavior.
I don't know, maybe I'm weird. I just don't assume that because somebody doesn't say anything about the situation, doesn't mean that they don't 'feel' harassed in some way. I don't know exactly how any of these guys truely felt on the inside. But I do know that many individuals in the workforce tolerate sexual harrashment on the daily basis, and elect not to take any actions towards it for fear of retailition, alienation or losing their job.
Thing is sometimes it's good rapport that develops these things. I also have a male friend that I have known for 25 years. We worked our first job out of college (last career) as newbies together. I call him "loser". It doesn't matter how many years go by, if I call him to check up and talk, I'll always say "hey loser" - there will be a short pause on the other line, then he'll excitedly say "hey netglow!!!!!" All this can be out of friendship. It may be that you aren't truly welcomed into the fold if you aren't included in the banter.
I understand. But calling someone "sexy" or "lover boy" doesn't sound like terms that ONLY 'friends' would share to me. Remarks like that can lead up to sexual tension amongst one another. Maybe.
i recall an incident that occurred long time ago, when i worked in a facility that demanded the "white uniform not scrubs" i bend over to pick-up a pen that one of my fellow nurses had dropped...when this other nurse grabbed me from behind with wide open hand my privates! i was so stun i jumped back into her hand!;as she replied"oh muscle boy likes it". having said that, this happened long ago when i was still a new nurse. it strikes me funny like one of you stated on a previous post that it's double standard; if a male acts inappropriately he's immediately writing up or fired. however, when the perpetrator is a female, the first thing is said "what you don't like women touching you?". needless to say, my motto at work is " i don't get my honey where i get my money"
that's horrible. i'm sorry you had to go through that.
Specializes in Trauma, ER, ICU, CCU, PACU, GI, Cardiology, OR.
ev1987, it sad to say, "lateral abuse" happens more frequently than we care to admit. in many cases the male never reports the incident, for fear to be named f----- or lose their job.
If you are uncomfortable and witness what you feel is inappropriate behavior, you might tell the person that their actions make you uncomfortable and ask them to stop. You might also report it. Often times, if the offender is made aware that their behavior is offensive to people around them, they will stop.
Frankly, I am surprised that you are witnessing such things. It sounds like your facility should be doing some better training. -If a witness becomes uncomfortable at sexual innuendos (even if they are not directed at the witness), it is an issue. --And sexual innuendos have no place in a professional environment.
Far as sexual harassment in the nursing profession - I've seen some pretty questionable behavior when I was acting as my mother's caregiver, but personally/professionally not so much. Closest thing I saw as a CNA (more accurately, an NAT) was during my skills test.
One of my skills was a back rub - got to the point of doing the back rub, and the examiner said "don't come in contact with her, just demonstrate the motions." OKFine - did as I was told. Moving on...my partner drew bedpan, and since I was unable to assist per the scenario (we had to modify it a bit, since I'm 5'7" and 280 lbs. a single person isn't going to do a bedpan on me without help or a Hoyer - or both) part of the skill was assisting with toileting. Sure enough, my partner got her washcloth, and proceeded to give me a professional wipe while coming in physical contact with my derrierre - nothing was said by the examiner.
Intellectually, I understood the rationale, at least as far as my actions (didn't want to have an incident during a skills test) but it seemed a little odd that a female NA was treated differently than a male NA, when both were simply demonstrating skills.
As far as the outcome - after we both passed the skills test, my partner came over and gave me a big hug, cried a bit & crossed herself; believe me I understood completely!
Far as sexual harassment in other venues - don't get me started; we'd be here all day! :argue:
Suffice to say that, if you're easily offended you probably don't want to work in community pharmacy. Warehouses are O.K. though - go fig.
in cases of inappropriate conduct or behavior between employees, it really doesn't matter if the activity was directed to one personally or not, as the simple presence of such already constitutes a hostile work environment as defined by federal statutes. the incidents cited in this thread all fall within such scope. the fact that others who have witnessed the behavior and feel uncomfortable with it is ample proof insofar as federal work rules are concerned.
i would suggest that anyone who sees this type of activity send an anonymous letter to management, citing the specifics of each case. i tend to think that once administration gets wind of these events, they would be very quick to stamp out this sort of harassment, regardless of the gender involved or source. this is because the employer is ultimately liable if they have knowledge but chose not to take action.
Specializes in burn ICU, SICU, ER, Trauma Rapid Response.
LOL! You call those examples of sexual harrasment!? I have been in nursing for 17 years and have experienced being turned down for promotion for no other reason than I am a man. I have not been offered job for no other reason than I am a man. Even had an old nun/RN/nurse manager tell me that even though she really liked my resume and she did offer me a job in a different unit She could not hire a man in to the position I applied to. I have observed other men in nursing be subected to aggresive investigations after being falsly accused of inappropiatly toutching a patient. I was accused of groping a crazy young female patient, well what the crazy girl said was "that really big guy with the beard in blue scrubs" toutched her. Turns out she and I were never in the hospital at the same time but I had to endure a week of suspension while her claim was investigated. The point is we are not given the benifit of the doubt in those situations.
The examples you gave seem pretty normal and not really harrasment to me.
In any of these examples the only test is to ask yourself, were you uncomfortable? can you speak directly to the person? or then take it to your supervisor and be ready to write down what happened.
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
What you speak of was not directed at you. I think you are being sensitive. If you are uncomfortable then pull the offender aside and tell them you found their behavior offensive. Not that this defends their behavior but now you know what it means to be cat called and wolf whistled by construction workers and have men speak to one's breasts instead of looking at one's eyes. Or being considered of lower intelligence if you are blonde and are well endowed in the chest region.
I remember after my divorce YEARS ago from my first husband... I lost a ton of weight and was stared and flirted and sexually =suggested to by every male MD on staff. A MD that is respected once asked me out and I told him I was easy but not cheap.....he said "No cheap, nice place" I told him as I played with the chest hair showing through his scrub top....." You don't understand. I'm extremely easy I'm just not cheap......give me the title to your 1963 xke jag and I will give you a night you will never forget" He looked stunned and laughed out loud......"She easy, she NO cheap!" and never bothered me again.
Some things you just have to let roll downhill like the feces coming out of their mouths. Peace.
Behaviors that constitute illegal sexual harassment in male against female interactions are identical to the unlawful behaviors in female against male interactions. But, men who are harassed are even less likely to report such actions than their female counterparts who suffered sexual harassment because of the stigma that others will ridicule them or perceive them to be weak or overly sensitive. "Just joking", or "I'm just being having fun with you" are not justifications for sexual harassment.
Reporting isn't necessarily the first line response; stating clearly and loudly that they do not welcome and will not tolerate such overt sexual behaviors is often enough to stop future harassment. Men often have more power when they are the object of this type of 'flirting'. A loud, firm rebuttal ("Get your hands off me! I have ZERO interest in you!") is more effective on women than it is with males.
But, this issue is one for the victim to deal with. You might pull him aside and offer your support and ask if he'd like your help, but it's ultimately up to him (or her, if the victim is female) to deal with the person and report the issue to supervision.
i was so stun i jumped back into her hand!;as she replied"oh muscle boy likes it". having said that, this happened long ago when i was still a new nurse. it strikes me funny like one of you stated on a previous post that it's double standard; if a male acts inappropriately he's immediately writing up or fired. however, when the perpetrator is a female, the first thing is said "what you don't like women touching you?". needless to say, my motto at work is " i don't get my honey where i get my money" 
Ev1987
347 Posts
Are you 100% that the remarks and comments are a 'one time deal'?