Scripting sounds patronizing

0.adamantite · Jul 2, 2015

If you hear the words "That must have been hard for you" come out of my mouth, you are either the rare person that has succeeded at shocking me and I'm trying to pick my jaw up off the floor, or I think you're a big baby.

BAHAHAHAHAHA! I could have written this post!

jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B · Jul 2, 2015

I recently went toe to toe with a new grad who had made a mistake in judgement, was passing the pt off to me in report, and I pointed out her mistake and tried to correct her. Let me preface this anecdote by saying, I'm normally very mellow with the new nurses, I definitely don't relish putting them in the hot seat.
She became very argumentative. But, what really then infuriated me was that she then pulled out some scripted, active listening lines on me. "I'm hearing what you're saying" and crap like that. Yeah, Pumpkin, I took the same classes way back when, you aren't helping your cause...
I said "So now you're patronizing me, eh?". Arrogant little brat.
Lesson for the allnurses audience? Don't pull out that scripted nonsense on your coworkers, or actually anyone with an IQ over 100 for that matter. That's my advise for the day...

I may have pointed out her error, then told her how I needed to fix it. Cause lets face it, she was probably not going to stick around and fix it herself. Then I would have just pointed it out to her preceptor for future reference.

Some people just talk like they are in a therapy session. Some, when confronted with an error are defensive, argumentative---then the lightbulb goes off and suddenly they are trying desperately to get out of it--by just nodding and smiling or using "active listening" techniques.....just to end the argument and go the heck home.

"I am hearing what you are saying" is much better than a "Yeah, right, whatever. (insert eyeroll here) I am outtie, do what you want, deuces" (

allnurses Guide · Jul 2, 2015

We don't have scripting, but there is a lot of therapeutic communication (of course!) in psych.

I think what some folks are doing wrong is in the word-for-word recitation. They exude no earnestness nor are they able to alter or improvise in any meaningful way. The phrase is merely plunked down in the middle of a sensitive situation in the most clumsy and thoughtless way.

Now, if you are a total newb, you'll start off sounding like an ass, but you hone your skill over time. It's a combo things like empathy, observation, improvisation... and acting . But it does have to be sincere, at some level and to some degree-- or people aren't gonna buy it!

If I'm talking to you about a concern that's upsetting to me, and you thunk down a I-hear-what-you're-saying line-- without demonstrating to me that you really are hearing what I'm saying-- well, I'm going to think you're an idiot.

Oh, and the worst is the repeating back... you know... to show that you are actively listening or trying to understand:

:sniff: “I’m grumpy!”

:yes: “Oh, so you’re grumpy?”

:cautious: “... and getting annoyed!”

:yes: “Oh, so you’re getting annoyed?”

:arghh:

Which always reminds me of this:

greenerpastures · Jul 2, 2015

NOt to get completely off the topic, but since this is about scripting - I saw something about a hospital in Michigan that started trying to "relate" to patients to bring up their scores. The new thing was "well Ms X, I here to do XYZ so we can get you home in time for XYZ." GREAT - another stupid script. My first thought was "now who the heck thought of that - what happens if we DON'T get her home in time? She'll say "we promised and we didn't deliver". Scripting should remain where it belongs, in the movies.

Animal House R.N., ADN, CNA, LVN · Jul 2, 2015

I cannot do scripting. I am a very direct person. My residents know this and love me for it. The other nurses I work with know me for it. Hell the Don knows me for it too. Love me :roflmao: . I am one of those folks that do not recognize social cues and scripting goes with it. My thought is we have problem a and b will fix it. So let's do b. I am busy, and need to move on next. So that being said I would have told her you made a mistake and you can help fix it. Call so and so and let's get it done. :sneaky:

PMFB-RN, RN · Jul 2, 2015

While very sceptical at first I have now come to realize just how useful a tool scripting is.

It is the first thing one should ask about when considering a new job. Itmakes the whole selection

process much easier.

Its simple:

Scripting = a hospital that doesn't care to be up on EBP and is a crappy place to work.

No scripting = more investigation is required

NursesRmofun, ASN, RN · Jul 2, 2015

I agree...but I prefer those over the ones that actually think that your experience somehow is lacking compared to how well they did in clinical or something similar. ha.

NursesRmofun, ASN, RN · Jul 2, 2015

Off topic a bit, but I just went thru that with the airlines! Had a flight attendant tell me she couldn't help me at all...BUT she was SOOOO glad I was there! hahaha As I walked out of the plane, she said again a very scripted line of, "We're glad you were with us today" or something similar. I just glared at her. HA.

Jensmom7, BSN, RN · Jul 3, 2015

Off topic a bit, but I just went thru that with the airlines! Had a flight attendant tell me she couldn't help me at all...BUT she was SOOOO glad I was there! hahaha As I walked out of the plane, she said again a very scripted line of, "We're glad you were with us today" or something similar. I just glared at her. HA.

Kind of makes you wonder, do they actually HEAR what they're saying??

mystory, BSN, RN · Jul 3, 2015

Geez..sounds like she was using a communication technique she learned in therapy. Unless she said it in a sarcastic/dismissive manner, which you didn't imply. Give her a break.

PMFB-RN, RN · Jul 3, 2015

Kind of makes you wonder, do they actually HEAR what they're saying??

I a sure they do. But they, like many nurses, have been told "you WILL say exactly what we tell you to say or lose your job".

KatieMI, BSN, MSN, RN · Jul 3, 2015

NurseRmorefun,

We just got, by God's grace, out of grip of Air Canada, which added 18 very unpleasant hours to our vacation.

Total of 8 hours of those were spent us attempting to communicate with people all and each of whom all that time said NOTHING but scripting. I mean, nothing literally. Not a single meaningful phrase, not a word, only meaningless customer- pleasing word salad. Very little action, and only as much as absolutely necessary. I had to remind one clerk to bent and pull out her computer mouse which fell after the woman was staring onto her workplace with empty eyes for good two minutes.Totally of one person who, after saying all that was required, then got off his chair, walked out there and brought our bags himself out of at least good couple of dozens, from clerks to upper managers.

I wonder if I would like to work like this one day, smiling and parroting out words and getting payed for this alone. On the other hand, I wish to know how they ever managed to turn so many folks into PavlovIan dogs only able to bark (sorry, provide customer service) for a bell ring (paycheck, sorry again).