OK, I love the threads for Rules of the ER and Dr.'s office...we need our own rules! Here are a few I can think of...
1) Vomit that is not witnessed by an adult does not count.
2) If you are able to scream "I can't breathe!" at the top of your lungs, trust me, you can breathe.
3) Don't think because I can't speak a lot of Spanish that you will get away with calling your parent and telling them the nurse said they had to come pick you up. Our clerk speaks Spanish just fine and will be happy to make the call for me, but thanks for offerring.
4) If you are well enough to ask me for a book, toy, or candy, you are well enough to be in class.
5) If you are well enough to whisper, giggle, or play with your friend who "happens" to also be sick, you are well enough to be in class.
6) There is not a sign on my forehead that says "sanitary napkin dispenser". This happens every month. Bring them from home.
7) If you are a teacher and ask me every single day for a band-aid or a pad, you will get very dirty looks from me. You earn a paycheck. Go to Walmart.
8) If you are a teacher and cannot tell the difference between a medical issue (which I will gladly handle) and a behavioral issue (which I will not), allow me to educate you.
9) I will not send a student home for a runny nose with no other symptoms. Get over it and give them a tissue.
10) You cannot fake a fever. Rubbing your cheeks until they are bright red might fool the teacher, but not me. Any you can run the water in the bathroom as long as you want, it will never get warm enough to drink and make your oral temp higher. Besides, when in doubt I have an electronic forehead thermometer, but points for creativity!
Teenage girls are going to get their period every month. Don't be shocked when I won't excuse you from PE because you have cramps, and for God's sake, carry some pads and tampons around with you! No, you can't have a handful of supplies from me, and I don't have pants to give you to wear.
Don't know what number we are up to but: Mr. Asst. Principal, I am not the potty police. If you think a kid is abusing hall passes, you can escort him to the toilet. I've got enough kids with legitimate toileting problems rather than your discipline problems.
Specializes in Cardiology, School Nursing, General.
Phone calls from students do not count as absences from the nurse. If I told you are okay and I even called your mom about it, then no reason to call your grandma to come get you.
Specializes in school nursing/ maternal/child hospital based.
**If you tell your child who complains of feeling ill to go to school anyway, but if they start feeling worse to have the nurse call you...they will ALWAYS say they feel worse and want to go home...even if they are happily bouncing around my office, afebrile and full of energy. Kids are not stupid, if they can get a free pass home, they will!
THIS THIS THIS!!!! The famous "get out of school free card" UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
cowboysandangels, BSN
171 Posts
Your leg is not broken if you ran all the way down the hall to my office from recess.