It's that time of year again, even though the holiday schedule has been out for a year, people are making last minute switches. No big deal except for a co-worker that approached me, after seeing i have Christmas Eve and Christmas Day off.
Started out nice: "I saw you had both days off, are you interested in trading them?" I said "Actually i'd like to keep both days off, my family has been through a lot, my dad's brother died a couple of weeks ago, and i'd like to go back home for those days." She said "Hmm, guess i won't be home for my kids for Christmas." I didn't say anything or do anything. Then after a minute she says "You don't have kids, what do you need Christmas off for?":angryfire
It's a wonder my head didn't explode. First off it wasn't her dang business what i wanted Christmas off for anyway, secondly how dare she make such a comment, as if those days won't mean squat to me all because i don't have children.
I'm sure her kids are important to her, i'm sure she would like to be there on those days, but the fact that i do not have children doesn't mean that things in my life are no less important. Nor should it mean that i should want to rearrange my life to accomodate someone that does. Which i've had to do a few times as a result of her taking 3 days weekends since august (we do self-scheduling). As a result of her doing this, i get screwed out of 3 days weekends 90% of the time. Her excuse for needing 3 days weekends? "Because i have kids." Not "My kid(s) has an appt., game, tournament, etc." "Because i have kids."
In no way am i knocking her because she has kids, or anyone, but it's almost like she expects accomodation from people because of the kids. It's not fair to everyone else. Everyone else manages and they have children. And everyone else at work wouldn't have made such a self-entitling statement about someone with no children having the holidays off, because most people take their turns every year. Just because i don't have children doesn not mean that i don't have a life or that i don't have things to do.
I agree with you about the comment referring to kids, your family is just as important as hers, I think alot of it has to do with people thinking christmas is all about kids, and its not, its what humans made it to be, Christmas was originated from Jesus's Birthday, we give gifts as a symbol of how Jesus recieved gifts on his Birthday, Santa, reindeer, there really fun. But Christmas was meant for people to join together and remember Jesus's Birthday and spend time with family and friends, Every family..not just the ones with kids, Anyhow...
Hi, I am Suzanne and i want to be a nurse, I am not a nurse, a year ago I applied to a technical school to go for a lpn, and did not make it in. It upset me and I forgot about my passion to be a nurse, the last two months I am on it again, thinking, oh yes, I can do it, who cares if I only have a GED, who cares if I have to pay cash for the whole thing, who cares, my husband is in the military, low rank, and we live pay check to pay check, to be able to pay for it will be an effort not known to man...lol
Anyhow, we will finnally be in a town for at least three years without moving, I can take out a small school loan but i dont want to take out alot, I will not get any assistance from anywhere but our own pocket, cuz, I do not have kids, so.....my question is, is it hard, the school i mean, I know from my spelling it might seem that I am a little illiterate, but I am not, I am about a B student, I was forced to drop out of school when I was sixteen, on my own ever since, going to college would be the biggest step I ever took, but....I am a little scared to leap, to get turned down by a director again, ugh, last time I cried for a week, I have been told my whole life by people, that I would never make it, My problem, Im scared of flunking out, and of having loans I cannot pay back, I need advice if anyone can help, If I go to nursing school it will be in the state of california next fall.
I would appreciate any advice from the nurses here
thank you
remember you can still support your troops without supporting the war
I'm the nurse manager on my unit and since we ususally have very low census on holidays we try to be a little creative with our schedules, for example on Christmas day we (yes me too!) have 6 hour blocks of scheduled time with another 6 hours of backup call split between the nurses who worked the previous 6 which ends up being 3 hours of call each and every gets a little part of the day with their family. I have a small child but I always volunteer to work the first part of the shift for my staff to be home... I just leave him some small gifts to open with the rest of the family and he knows mom will be home after lunch and we'll open everything else then.
some people are real selfish. i was trying to ask around my unit to see if anyone could take my saturday night shift. i wanted to go to a party with my hubby. but as it turned out, no one could take it. i never asked for reasons. it would have been great if someone could take my shift, but i'm not upset that they were busy.
also, there are nursing jobs out there that don't require nurses to work on the holidays. i had a job like that. we had the weekends and holidays off. 9-5 monday to friday. i could sleep in my own bed at night! sometimes, i could leave early on friday. hmmm......
Marie, you need to be telling her, not ranting to us. Nursing profession is filled with nurses ranting to their friends, family, co-worker but not the person they have a problem with....so disfunctional.
I let her know, but later.
If i had done it right then, it would dripped with anger, and i have no desire to let her know she peezed me off that much.
In my opinion she needs to probably find another job. One with the holiday's off. I have kids and that's what I did. I certainly didn't expect someone with no kids to work all holidays and just because I had kids I would get them off. Enjoy your christmas and don't worry about her. If it's that important to her she'll work it out.
My husbad, sister, daughter-in-law and myself are all in the medical field.
We realized a long time ago that the most important thing about the holidays was not the actually date, but getting together as a family to celebrate the event. For that reason we have holidays sometimes two weeks early or late. We still have something small with our immediate family, once again whenever we can arrange it. My son's except this because this is the only thing they have ever known. And now my grandaughter is adaptine very well. Our only problem was the "non-medical" family that never under stood why we had have special arrangement because we worked the holidays. Maybe this mother should realize it's the people not the day that make an event special.
I have 3 teenage daughters, one of which is now married. I often had to work holidays and just sucked it up...yes of course I would have much rather have been off but that's how it goes. Years ago when my girls were little, I have had several holidays where other staff have traded me days or just took the day for me so I could be home...but in NO way did I ask them...they just said "I don't have little one and it means more for you to be home with your's". I thought that was very sweet of them, but very unexpected. Now that my kids are older I have heard from one nurse "well your kids are older so you don't HAVE to be off", no I don't HAVE to, but it would be nice. But they are still my family and I still have a life. Of course this year is my christmas day to work, but that's ok....my kids set up "christmas morning" when I get home from work at 3.
This topic goes right hand in hand with staying over for the next shift when short, now I don't mind doing it once in awhile, but when askeed and you state "I can't this time" why would someone ask "why what do you have to do after work?" Uh I don't have my life?!?
Anyhow....I hope everyone has a great holiday season whether we are working or not....and remember at least we know at the end of the day we can go home to our families and have our celebrations....those patients/residents cannot. Take care.
I do have children and this discussion was a SORE point between my husband and I. When I went back for nursing, we already had children. I told him I intended to get a job that didn't require holidays/weekends r/t the kids. He told me "you have to pay your dues" This coming from a man who's work gives them the day off (with pay) to vote every November, Christmas to New Years off.:angryfire
News for your co-worker. There are jobs out there that would better accommodate her children if that is her priority. It may be less pay, but life's full of tough choices.
In the years I've been in nursing (5) I have yet to work Christmas, New Years, etc. Because I chose my job with my children in mind.
So my advise to you is to tell her if she doesn't like it, go else where with her concerns.
Heck, I'm a childless pagan and I still love Christmas. Haven't worked it in at least 15 years but that's because I stick to outpatient clinics that aren't even open. And I'm currently per diem so I can also have Winter Solstice time off.
All that said, If I snagged Xmas as my holiday off in a hospital job, I'd be keeping it.
I received an email today from a nurse friend of mine. It was entitled..."from the mouths of babes".....it basically asked young children, what does love mean....or what is love? One of the responses was from Bobby, age 7....he said...."Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
That's totally the truth....so that's really what Christmas is all about....it's the halting of the presents...the quietness of the love that you feel.
Hopefully, those who have to work on Christmas day can find another time to celebrate, if it's Dec 24, or in the wee hours of the morning on the Dec. 25....whenever it may be. It's all about love....although I do understand both sides of this situation. I have been in both sides myself as a nurse. After I had children, I chose to change my work environment. I have been working in home health for 18 years, and it's been the best of both worlds. I can spend time with my family, even if I have to work a particular day. It's all about choices, and we are lucky we have a profession where there are plenty of choices........we make those decisions....what are our priorities...what we can live with and without. This will continue to be an issue as long as there are nurses around......it's all about choice.
I worked several years of 12 hour night shift. We always alternated years being off. I also have a daughter from my first marriage so I not only had to deal with work schedule, but also his plans.
I simply told my kids when they were young that Santa came on a special day for them because he knew that their mommy had to work taking care of sick people. They believed me and it made them feel extra special because Santa came especially for them. This way we could have Christmas on ANY day.
Worked for us, and I was never so selfish to expect others to give up their family holiday..
My daughter is now grown and also in the medical field.... so now it becomes even more complicated to plan when we are both off, but ya know, it only matters that we are together and sharing family time. Not the DATE.
jamesnsuzi
3 Posts
I agree with you about the comment referring to kids, your family is just as important as hers, I think alot of it has to do with people thinking christmas is all about kids, and its not, its what humans made it to be, Christmas was originated from Jesus's Birthday, we give gifts as a symbol of how Jesus recieved gifts on his Birthday, Santa, reindeer, there really fun. But Christmas was meant for people to join together and remember Jesus's Birthday and spend time with family and friends, Every family..not just the ones with kids, Anyhow...
Hi, I am Suzanne and i want to be a nurse, I am not a nurse, a year ago I applied to a technical school to go for a lpn, and did not make it in. It upset me and I forgot about my passion to be a nurse, the last two months I am on it again, thinking, oh yes, I can do it, who cares if I only have a GED, who cares if I have to pay cash for the whole thing, who cares, my husband is in the military, low rank, and we live pay check to pay check, to be able to pay for it will be an effort not known to man...lol
Anyhow, we will finnally be in a town for at least three years without moving, I can take out a small school loan but i dont want to take out alot, I will not get any assistance from anywhere but our own pocket, cuz, I do not have kids, so.....my question is, is it hard, the school i mean, I know from my spelling it might seem that I am a little illiterate, but I am not, I am about a B student, I was forced to drop out of school when I was sixteen, on my own ever since, going to college would be the biggest step I ever took, but....I am a little scared to leap, to get turned down by a director again, ugh, last time I cried for a week, I have been told my whole life by people, that I would never make it, My problem, Im scared of flunking out, and of having loans I cannot pay back, I need advice if anyone can help, If I go to nursing school it will be in the state of california next fall.
I would appreciate any advice from the nurses here
thank you
remember you can still support your troops without supporting the war