I work as a private practice NP Internal Medicine provider in the same medical center where I started as RN years ago.
A some time ago, I stopped sharing ANY private information about myself and my family, period. Partially it was due to xenophobia I experienced in the same place, partially due to current political situation and partially because I am, well, sick and tired of sharing information that has nothing to do with business. I am nice, polite and adamant about it, whether one feels like "just curious" or not. But, since I was there before, some pieces leaked out and stayed in collective memory.
Over the last year, I encountered more than once that patients/families somehow got to know where I came from and some other details I did not share with them. It is Trump country overall, so more than once it led to situations when I was asked humiliating (to say it mildly) questions directly in my face, refusal of care under premise that I must be "a spy or something", etc. Needless to say, it doesn't make my life any better.
The single source of leak in all cases with no exclusion were staff RNs. I spoke with them; some outright denied telling patients anything, but when presented with facts, everyone started the same spiel: "the patient/family just wanted to know where are you from, what are you doing here in America and if you have any kids - they are customers, you know, and why they cannot know if they are just curious?" No one of them had an impression that what they did was wrong.
In my opinion, doing so is, at least, unprofessional.
Speaking with NURSING management led to nowhere. They have no policies about it, and "what if he just wanted to know, and the nurse happens to know, and not comfortable to say "no"?"
This is what happens when administration of a hospital starts to run it as a family B&B of a sort with additional medical services thrown in for a change. "Customer service" everything for inhabitants of small towns who hardly ever leave them. Staff and patients are frequently from the same neighborhood and, of course, discuss local things and people all the time.
I don't oppose it all till it crosses personal boundaries, common sense and clinical decision making. But sometimes things get crossed - all of them.
Unfortunately, after 16 years of being generally nice and open I had to reconsider. It is not that I have grounds to be afraid, but I do not want to hear ever again anything along "oh, if your kid loves math, she will become one of these computer freaks and spies and sell us all to Moscow!" I wish it would be a joke, but it was not. Just like a guy who wanted me to "just taste" a substance he was told I am severely allergic to, it was said absolutely seriously.
Maybe it is my PTSD making me thin-skinned in some places, but I just want to keep my life for myself. At least for here and now.
BTW, I was accused in "stealing jobs from real Americans" and worse along the line more than once. I do not want to hear that as well.
How did you reply to these things?
Did you report the "just taste" person? To whom? What reaction did you get?
I don't know how I can make this any clearer but I'll try. I. Know. Because. I. Asked. Them. If. It. Was. Okay. And. They. Said. They. Didn't. Mind. At. All.
Sorry, but this is starting to get irritating. Some of you keep making assumptions that are grossly inaccurate and damn you're like a dog with a bone who won't let go.
Katie's situation is entirely different. Her workplace environment is extremely hostile and her patients are jerks. Her coworkers' behavior is beyond the pale with an evil intent that is indefensible. I don't doubt at all the malicious nature of their actions.
OP, as a Internal Medicine NP your patients know your first and last name don't they? Today, with the internet, it is very easy for anyone to find out all kinds of information about other people with a simple internet search, and if a person is really determined, they can find out even more information. Are you aware of this? You do know that your patients can look up your name at your state Board of Nursing web site, and can view your licensure information and other public information?
They will see there:
- my first and last name;
- my birthdate (hi, maybe once in a while someone sends me a card?)
- my license number and if I am in good standing;
- my home address (where I may or may not actually live as long as I list it as current and pick up post)
That's it. Nothing about my country of origin, way of immigration, citizenship, family, who is working/living/studying where, hobbies, etc. subjects "they just want to know". Your note, therefore, is only minimally relevant.
I am not present on any social networks, BTW. One can, of course, try to find and break my account on Amazon to deduce more from my shopping habits, but good luck with it.
Did you report the "just taste" person? To whom? What reaction did you get?
Just if you so much "want to know" - it happened when I was still working bedside. In front of my charge, who was shocked just like me and just changed assignment right away.
OP, as a Internal Medicine NP your patients know your first and last name don't they? Today, with the internet, it is very easy for anyone to find out all kinds of information about other people with a simple internet search, and if a person is really determined, they can find out even more information. Are you aware of this? You do know that your patients can look up your name at your state Board of Nursing web site, and can view your licensure information and other public information?
That is entirely different from coworkers gossiping about her with clients.
It is another perspective in regard to one's personal privacy, as the OP is concerned with his/her personal privacy.
It is an unfortunate fact of modern life that some one who really wants to can find out a fair amount of information about any of us online (less in the case of those of us who make an effort to not volunteer info online). That in no way excuses or makes acceptable the behavior of the OP's coworkers.
It is an unfortunate fact of modern life that some one who really wants to can find out a fair amount of information about any of us online (less in the case of those of us who make an effort to not volunteer info online). That in no way excuses or makes acceptable the behavior of the OP's coworkers.
Today one has far less privacy than in the past even if the OP succeeds in getting her co-workers to give absolutely no personal information out about her to patients in the future. That is the bigger picture I am referring to.
I'm sorry, as a white native-born female, I don't have any words of advice for you-at least not any that would be coming from an informed place. What I do want to say, however, is that it is very disappointing to see the amount of people in this thread that don't see the problem here. Trump's America, am I right? Anyway, I encourage anyone-especially those in a place of inherent privilege-to step back and recognize the privileges you are awarded in our society. While we don't know the OPs specific circumstances, one can only assume they are a POC and/or have an accent. Now, could you imagine a white PCP from Canada or the UK being put into the same position as the OP? No-because it most likely wouldn't happen. I'm sorry you're going through this OP. I can only hope that the Cheeto will be out of office soon and his base will disappear with him.
Except OP has EXPLICITLY told them she is NOT comfortable having that information shared with patients. It would be one thing if they'd just told people when they were unaware. I agree at that point the RNs could presume she'd be okay with it. But to continue giving out information after being told not to? No, that's not okay.
I've read through the thread several times and I haven't seen where the OP "EXPLICITLY told the RNs' she is not comfortable having that information shared with patients."
Kooky Korky, BSN, RN
5,216 Posts
Can you give an example?