ALL hospitals can be referred to as ___(insert name of your hospital here) ___ Hilton or Sheridan because nurses are there to see to your every need even if there is someone else who might be in more need of the nurse's attention (i.e. someone in resp distress).
A little off subject but I just had to say:
When doing my preceptorship in March I had a nurse inform me "It is YOUR JOB to get the pts family and doctors coffee when they come in". I mean the women got mad when I said no it is not my job to do so but if I have the time I may or may not do it. Also note that we had a coffe station outside of the desk for the family to help themself.
1. The nurse doesn't know what she's doing when she doesn't get the iv first time on my morbidly obese, dehydrated 97y.o. great-grandmother.(happened today)
2. The only reason anyone becomes a nurse is to land a Doctor
3. The nurse has a secret magic communication device to summon my Dr. immediately. Because there is no way my Dr. would ignore numerous pages.
4. The nurses spend too much time "playing" on the computers.(never mind I'm already an hour overtime and doing my documenting because I just spent the last 8 hours busting my butt to keep everyone happy)
5. It's the nurses fault when case management and your insurance company decide you no longer meet criteria for hospitilization and need to be discharged.
6. There's really no need to close the door or pull the curtain while I'm on the bsc facing into the hall. I'm claustrophobic.
and my all time favorite
7. How dare you ask me and my 19y.o. girlfriend to quit making out in my hospital bed because the poor little 88y.o man in bed 2 is getting a little embarrassed.
I'm not actually able to see my patients' monitors, so I need visitors to keep a close eye on everything that's being monitored on my patient, and notify me if the number changes (or goes up and then comes back down, or the waveform gets a bit bumpy for half a second). I just need to tell them what each number represents, what "normal" ranges are, and be prepared to tell them what I'm going to do to "fix it" the second the number doesn't look right to them. God forbid I change my setup or my screen view -- I'd better be prepared to defend myself when I'm asked why that number on the bottom used to say 14 and now it says 100, and they don't believe me when I say it's really okay.
Another favorite misconception:
That "the doctor" comes in and checks on my patient several times a day -- and always within the past hour or two before visitors arrive. It's an emergency if he hasn't checked on my patient recently; I mean, how are these patients ever to survive if doctors aren't in the room caring for them?
Specializes in Telemetry, ICU, Resource Pool, Dialysis.
My favorite public misconception of the day:
I'm not actually able to see my patients' monitors, so I need visitors to keep a close eye on everything that's being monitored on my patient, and notify me if the number changes (or goes up and then comes back down, or the waveform gets a bit bumpy for half a second). I just need to tell them what each number represents, what "normal" ranges are, and be prepared to tell them what I'm going to do to "fix it" the second the number doesn't look right to them. God forbid I change my setup or my screen view -- I'd better be prepared to defend myself when I'm asked why that number on the bottom used to say 14 and now it says 100, and they don't believe me when I say it's really okay.
I call these wonderful and helpful folks "monitor buffs." Gotta love em. Especially when they are just SURE their __________ isn't being properly monitored. I have seen them, after several attempts to try to let us know that the HR number was 76, now it is 95!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What's going on????????????????????????????? Did you call the doctor??????????????????????pull up a chair facing the monitor screen in the patient's room and monitor ____________ properly. Hrumphhhhh.
Patients who think that having pain after having their hip replaced means that there is something wrong. HELLO- They use Black and Decker tools in there and you were in the same position for a couple hours!!! You might just want to take some pain meds!
Or one of my favorites, I'm allergic to needles!
Or the patient goes out for a smoke and wants me to get them some toast with peanut butter with a glass of milk and a tea and don't forget to butter the toast as soon as it pops up! And they'll be back in a minute!
On the monitor front - we had family members come rushing out hysterically because their mother was "hypotensive - her blood pressure's dropping!"
Although we did wonder how they were able to tell, we went in to the patient, who looked fine. SHe was surrounded by three daughters, all pointing to her IMED pump...
Rate: 84
VTBI: 60
"But when we got here was 130"
Save me from people with a (really) little knowledge
flashpoint
1,327 Posts
Or have a PhD in Theology, Education, Biology...