In a discussion I had with my brother in law today (who is a future nurse!), I learned he is uncomfortable with public breastfeeding unless there is a blanket involved. I know some folks wouldn't even like it with a blanket! I strongly feel that, as nurses, we should be doing what we can to support and advocate for breastfeeding and shed it in a positive light. I couldn't believe that a health care professional would feel differently. Obviously, this is coming from the United States (sigh).
I'm someone that usually works to make people feel comfortable in situations, but if my baby needs to be fed and some guy doesn't like it, well then he doesn't have to look! My baby comes first. That's how I feel about it. Guys will say that we shouldn't expose our breasts because they are too sexual, then agree that breastfeeding isn't sexual, but still say that we should hide it.....I cannot follow the circular reasoning.
I want to raise sons who know that breasts, as sexually appealing as they may be to them when they are older, are made to feed babies. That a uterus carries babies and lady partss birth them. I believe that this gives men a truer, deeper respect for women and for all human beings ... our bodies are not just sex objects! I saw a funny T-shirt that said -- Breasts: Not just for selling cars anymore!
I wanted to see what other nurses thought about this, on a personal level as well as a public health level.
I breastfeed my daughter for 10 months. I was always unsuccessful with feeding her in public. I don't know if it was the blanket covering her or if it was the inability to get into a comfortable position. I fully support women who chose to feed in public, just don't do it in an eating environment.
I'm not a mother, not a nurse....just a bystander. I have no problems with mothers discretely breastfeeding in public places...but that's the kicker isn't it...everyone seems to have a different opinion on "discretely". I know breastfeeding is a "natural" activity....but there are lots of "natural" activities that I don't want to witness while I'm eating in a restaurant.
My sister has just had her second child....she borders on militant on her right to breastfeed (right being a very big word). I just think that with everyone so defensive on their rights (her right to breastfeed, a passerby's right not to have to explain it to their young children) it's hard to meet in the middle with so many folks.
I guess I just wish that both sides could consider both perspectives a bit more and be sensitive that whether you think it should be or not...this is a cultural change here in the states. I don't remember seeing women breastfeeding in public while I was growing up......where as now it's a somewhat common site. It takes time and consideration for changes....and I just wish we were kinder with each other during the growing pains.
Take the whole blow up with Barbara Walters on the View....all she did was say she was uncomfortable when a woman sitting next to her on an airplane started breastfeeding.....she didn't say anything to the woman at the time and said that that she had the right to breastfeed....but just mentioned she was uncomfortable at the time.....the next day there were protesters for crying out loud....the show had to make a public apology. Since when did someone admitting that they were feeling uncomfortable become a problem for all of us....talk about intolerant, can't we give each other a little growing room?
My .02
Peace,
Cathie
Good point. Perhaps both sides need to look at the opposing viewpoint, respectively.
Edit: my concern about just covering up the baby with a blanket is: what if the blanket falls off and/or you need to bend over? Then everything hangs out!
Specializes in Critical Care, Pediatrics, Geriatrics.
I fully support women who chose to feed in public, just don't do it in an eating environment.
I don't understand this at all. I am glad you support breastfeeding in public but to put a limitation on which 'public area' is acceptable......well, it just does not make sense to me.
"Don't FEED your child in a resturaunt!" Seems quite ironic to me to say the least. I am sure as a mom, you recognized early on that everytime you sit down to eat the baby gets hungry too. I am sure the smell of food aggrivates the issue. So......make your baby wait and scream and cry.......or go off to the dirty bathroom, cold (hot) car, etc.........or just don't go to resturaunts period? Which of these do you propose?
Is it because you think you will make others lose their appetite? *Sigh*......I am through with this conversation. I think we have thoroughly :deadhorse
Wow, asoldierswife. That's awful. I'm glad I didn't see that one.
Not only does that fact that it's legal in all 50 states give her the right (http://www.ncsl.org/ programs/health/breast50.htm), but so does the responsibility of being the best mother she is able to be in her situation. If you don't like it, don't look.
I agree that it's best to be discreet though, too. But wouldn't it be nice if your brother DID see it as a natural thing... Like, "oh, that's what mothers do"....rather than flashbacks to the soft-core Media we see on TV everyday? I dream that boys can be raised in that way...to still appreciate breasts sexually in that appropriate context, but to be able to understand them in the motherly, nurturing context as well. I know that viewpoint is hard to find in this neck of the woods...
I had a child when I was 43 and my boys were 15 and 17 and I "discreetly" breastfed their little brother in front of them all the time. I breastfed in church. I breastfed in restaurants. I breastfed at a breastfeeding conference table. Heck, I breastfed my son until he was 3 1/2 . .. . :)
I seriously doubt seeing their mom breastfed their little brother did them any harm and hopefully will help them be great husbands to their future wives and support breastfeeding.
If we really want to talk about what is hurting teenage boys, lets talk about how easy it is to access internet Media. :angryfire
There is a trial going on in my community where a 17 year old raped and murdered a young woman. Part of what the prosecuters are bringing up is his interest in internet sites containing images of violent sex, bound women and grisly photographs of seminude and scantily clad women said to be murder victims. It is just a click away folks.
Seeing a breastfeeding mom is hardly gonna warp ANYONE.
Q. ~ It's a simple fact that breasts produce milk to feed humans. If a woman chooses to utilize that God given ability, why should she be concerned about who sees it? Your kids should know that babies are fed by their mom's breasts or by formula & bottles.
I mean honestly, I've seen many nursing mothers and I rarely see any part of her boob. Where do you all find these women that are flinging their boobs & milk around
The only place I've seen this is at a midwive's convention . . . . :)
I agree - seeing a woman breastfeeding would be a great time to talk to your kids about how babies eat.
That is not the same as being forced to watch Janet Jackson though. With or without her breast hanging out.
Good point. Perhaps both sides need to look at the opposing viewpoint, respectively.
Edit: my concern about just covering up the baby with a blanket is: what if the blanket falls off and/or you need to bend over? Then everything hangs out!
Well, not everything. Just the one breast that the baby was nursing . . . . . .:rotfl:
We haven't had one of these threads in a long time . . . maybe people didn't read the sticky about it.
I think there's a big difference in breastfeeding your own child in front of your own other children and breastfeeding them in front of someone else's children, especially when they are teen-aged boys and in public. Natural function or not, these boys are at the "hormones are raging" stage and guaranteed NOT to be thinking about the nutritional aspect of it.
Breastfeed in public, but give as much as you expect to get. Be, at the very least, aware of your surroundings and act accordingly. The world doesn't revolved around any of us, nor should it.
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
I
I seriously doubt seeing their mom breastfed their little brother did them any harm and hopefully will help them be great husbands to their future wives and support breastfeeding.
If we really want to talk about what is hurting teenage boys, lets talk about how easy it is to access internet Media. :angryfire
There is a trial going on in my community where a 17 year old raped and murdered a young woman. Part of what the prosecuters are bringing up is his interest in internet sites containing images of violent sex, bound women and grisly photographs of seminude and scantily clad women said to be murder victims. It is just a click away folks.
Seeing a breastfeeding mom is hardly gonna warp ANYONE.
steph
AMEN AND AMEN Steph. I so agree. Hormonal teenagers should have been taught LONG ago about the "facts of life" including breastfeeding. If they can't handle it, it's not the breastfeeding mom's fault, now is it?
I'm very supportive of breastfeeding moms. When my husband and I began dating, we went to an IMAX theatre. Next to me was a mom with a 3 mo. old baby. This baby was so good, and then I found out that his mom was breastfeeding him through most of the movie in the most discreet way, even though the lights were already down. As a person, I would much rather prefer that than a baby screaming next to me the whole time because he wants to eat and mom can't/won't go feed him and just wants to watch the movie, not paying attention to her baby who wants to eat. As a Certified Breastfeeding Educator, kudos to all moms who breastfeed in public. It can be done very discreetly with a blanket and most people walking by may not even know what's going on. Cheers to breastfeeding moms everywhere!!!
AMEN! No matter what you do, who you are, or how you do it....there is always going to be some jerkwad somewhere that has a problem with it, beit breastfeeding or anything else. Can't please everyone. Child has to eat whether or not it offends some uptight person who can't separate the breast as being both a functional object and a sexual object.
Try and cover up just out of respect for those who we acknowlege as being uncomfortable or having wandering eyes, but if something pops out and someone is staring enough to catch that little glimpse, well big deal. You saw a strangers nipple/cleavage. I am sure you are not ruined for life......if you suspect you are go see a psychiatrist.
And for those moms who rant that they are NOT going to be discreet blah, blah, blah.......that is just about as narrowminded as someone saying you should not be allowed to breast feed in public.
Middle ground is what I seek. Gotta give a little from both sides.
I agree....both sides should try being flexible.
I prefer Moms to be discreet when BF'ing but if some flesh is exposed, so what I guess I will survive LOL! :)
myra01
1 Post
I breastfeed my daughter for 10 months. I was always unsuccessful with feeding her in public. I don't know if it was the blanket covering her or if it was the inability to get into a comfortable position. I fully support women who chose to feed in public, just don't do it in an eating environment.