Personal relationships with professors?

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Specializes in AICU.

A professor that i took A&P 2 with last semester emailed me about having coffee! Im not sure what to tell him as far as yes or no because i had planned on taking another course with him during the fall! I dont want to hurt my chances on getting into his class because I need it for my BSN but im not sure about this whole meeting for coffee thing!!

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Tell him no and explain your concerns about next semester. If he has a shred of ethics, he should understand.

If something were to go wrong relationship-wise, you don't want it to spill over into academics, which could ultimately affect your degree and career.

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Specializes in AICU.

your so right I dont want to assume that he has bad intentions but it just feels weird to even have a discussion about meeting for any reason other than class! I just sent him a tasteful email declining his invitation and telling him I look forward to his class in the fall! Thanks for the advice!

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If things turn out bad, you can always go to another school and transfer credits if he seems more like the annoying type..

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Specializes in Acute Care Psych, DNP Student.

Keep the emails. I doubt you would need them but you never know.

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Specializes in 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER.

Almost ran into this last year with my Lit professor, but it was a little more complicated, because we both didn't have our pictures on a personals website, yada yada yada. When i realized that i would probably wind up in another one of his classes, i kept my distance.

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i'd say overall it's not a good idea to mix business with anything else. you did the right thing to politely decline, and hopefully that will discourage him from asking the next student.

i'd never consider dating at work, because what happens after she hates me in a couple of weeks? :).

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Specializes in pure and simple psych.
:nono: :nono: :nono: :nono: :nono: Not a good idea. Teachers talk to one another, and if things did not turn out, he might destroy your reputation, make others think you are a poor, or demanding, or untruthful, or something. Good thought on keeping a hard copy of the e-mails, though.
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Specializes in ED, ICU, MS/MT, PCU, CM, House Sup, Frontline mgr.

I agree with the above posters, you cannot go for coffee. It is that simple. I am a Professor and WE DO TALK!

If you have to pretend you have a jealous boyfriend, then do so. Let him know you are the same way and that you would not appreciate your boyfriend going to coffee with his instructors. Do whatever you feel comfortable doing or saying but the answer is "No."

He can think whatever he wants about you rejecting his invitation. He should be ashamed of himself for asking you out in the first place! :madface:

After you graduate and go off to do something else then it might be OK! Before that you are jeopardizing your reputation and your standing with other Professors if you decide to go for coffee. Good luck!

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your so right I dont want to assume that he has bad intentions but it just feels weird to even have a discussion about meeting for any reason other than class! I just sent him a tasteful email declining his invitation and telling him I look forward to his class in the fall! Thanks for the advice!

You did the right thing. He is not conducting himself in an ethical fashion.

Good luck in the fall, I woud feel uncomfortable taking another class with him.

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If things turn out bad, you can always go to another school and transfer credits if he seems more like the annoying type..

Wow, I really hope that's a sarcastic sense of humor you have!:uhoh3:

Like everyone else said, there's absolutely no sense in either pursuing this or letting him pursue you. You can pretend you're otherwise involved, or be more direct and say you would never want ANYONE to think that there was ever any inappropriate relationship between the two of you, and that includes going out off campus for coffee. You can let him know what a shame it would be to have anyone think there was an ETHICS problem here ;)

Personally, I'd choose another instructor for the next class.

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Specializes in AICU.

I think its great advice on keeping the emails! He replied to my email this morning and seemed ok with me saying no to his offer, however he did include his cell phone # and told me if I needed anything at all over the summer he would be available!

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