We have all had a time in our lives where the most unfortunate things have come out of our mouths, and a coworker of mine had one recently, that while it caused an immediate cringe, could be looked back upon later with a chuckle, because we've ALL done it.
We had a successful post code, drowning victim that was lethargic but oriented. While doing an Xray, my coworker stated "OK, hold your breath like you're going under water!"
Thankfully the pt didn't seem to grasp the ridiculousness of that statement, but I assure you we all had that immediate pucker - factor moment! What ridiculously hilarious things have you all said that you wished you could take back, but are still somehow humorous?
Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
I went to a Christian school in high school and had to give a stand-up biology presentation in front of the whole school.....The word "orgasm" came out of my mouth instead of the word "organism".
The entire school was laughing until tears ran until the principal shut everyone down. I was mortified.
I had a nursing instructor who was giving a lecture regarding older/geriatric patients and sexuality, and she said, "Older people are still capable of having organisms."
There was a whole classroom of students who were shaking, tears running down their faces, trying desperately not to start laughing out loud.
That instructor was Ms. Malaprop. She was forever either sticking her foot in her mouth, tangling up her words, or otherwise sounding stupid. I'll never forget when we were covering different cultures and how culture can impact caregiving. When she got to the section of the syllabus for African-Americans, she said, "Black people. Well, they're just like white people now so they don't have a different culture. (OK, this is true, so if anyone gets offended, remember, this was my instructor!)
I made the classic mistake of thinking an older woman with a young male patient was his mother, when in fact she was his wife. I'll never forget that look she had. Her face fell, and I thought she was going to start crying. I never backpedaled so hard in my life.
I was getting an elderly lady ready to go to PT (this was when I was a student). I was on the floor, looking all over for her R shoe. The pt said, "Honey, what are you doing?" I told her her I was looking for her R shoe. She said, "Honey, I haven't needed a R shoe for over twenty years!" Yep, she had a RBKA!
When I have to do an overhead page I seem to get flustered and can't tell you how many times I've forgotten what I meant to say and said "Oh s***!" Instead lol, cracks up my coworkers, not management so much though lol
Before I got my nursing license I worked in retail. Desperate for shifts, I agreed to come in and be the operator (no automated phone systems then). I had never done it before and had about a 2 minute crash course. Needless to say, I screwed up the buttons, accidentally answered the phone call via the overhead announcement system, and a few seconds into it realized it was being broadcasted overhead. I immediately said "OH S@$T!!!" And hung up the phone, all on the overhead....yeah, coworkers were hysterical...management...no more extra shifts as operator😬
I was walking a patient from registration to pre-op, as we walked I was looking at her face sheet to remind myself what she was having done. Her ICD-9 code, reason for surgery, stated cystic fibrosis. I blurted out....."You have cystic fibrosis!" She gasped,"I do!" Immediately I realized it was supposed to be fibro-cystic breast disease. It took a little convincing, but I finally convinced her that her doctor was not keeping some "disease" a secret from her....she did not have cystic fibrosis, it was coded wrong. I did go to the registration clerk and had them correct the mistake.
I worked retail for years before I became a student. When the first Harry Potter movie was coming out on DVD we had to ask every customer if they would like to preorder a copy. About the 300th time of saying this I accidentally asked if the customer would like to preorder the Harry Potty movie. I still wonder if they thought I was asking if they'd like a copy of some really weird Media (Hairy Potty).
I can also relate to the overhead speaker stories. It seems like every time I would go to page someone I would draw a blank and then fumble while I tried to remember what I needed.
Starting my new job in the ED I had a male patient come in with chest pain accompanied by a female. Once in the room the patient and I were talking and joking around about his fear of needles and the lady was just sitting in a corner visibly upset with arms crossed and all. So I asked her if she was ok and she responded that she was fine, just mad. So I turn to my patient and said: "No wonder you have chest pain. What did you do to make the wifey angry?" She turns to me and responds: "That's exactly the problem... that I'm NOT the wife". All I could say was "That's what I get for not minding my own business... here is your call light, if you need me I'll be right outside". Walked out with my face as red as a tomato!!!!
Like thatnurse1, i have also misidentified folks - wife, not daughter; wife, not mother; mother, not wife; girlfriend, not wife. I have made it a rule to ask who everyone is "just so i know the players".
Got in report that a patient was admitted for DKA. Go to patient's room, do upper body assessment, all the while talking to the patient about diabetes management and warning "You'll lose your feet and possibly your legs if you don't manage this better", Patient responded "Yes, I'm well aware of that." Threw back the sheets, and out of my mouth popped "Where the heck are your legs?" "Guess I should have listened to you about that diabetes thing, huh?" came the answer. Patient was a BKA.
The previous nurse and never been into the room, leaving all care to the tech and had told me the wrong diagnosis.
I was a teen mom. While in labor, at 16, my father (40 yo) was in the room with me keeping me company (father of the baby was in the service and deployed overseas).
An RN walked in, looked at my father and asked a question. What I heard was "Is this your father?" Evidently, what she really asked was "Is this THE father?" I said "Yes." Dad got some really evil looks for a while, until the father of the baby called to check on us.
I had a patient who had been run over by a female driving while he was out joggin he was left paralyzed from waist down as I was pushing him down the hallway, a woman in a wheelchair came from the other direction, I stopped and told him let's let her go first because you know how women drivers are she might run you over. He looked at me as I stood there stunned at what I said and he said, "no really tell me about it!" At that point if a hole had opened up in the floor I would have dove for it. He wasn't offended, he had a chuckle at the look on my face.
OCNRN63, RN
5,979 Posts
I had a nursing instructor who was giving a lecture regarding older/geriatric patients and sexuality, and she said, "Older people are still capable of having organisms."
There was a whole classroom of students who were shaking, tears running down their faces, trying desperately not to start laughing out loud.
That instructor was Ms. Malaprop. She was forever either sticking her foot in her mouth, tangling up her words, or otherwise sounding stupid. I'll never forget when we were covering different cultures and how culture can impact caregiving. When she got to the section of the syllabus for African-Americans, she said, "Black people. Well, they're just like white people now so they don't have a different culture. (OK, this is true, so if anyone gets offended, remember, this was my instructor!)
I made the classic mistake of thinking an older woman with a young male patient was his mother, when in fact she was his wife. I'll never forget that look she had. Her face fell, and I thought she was going to start crying. I never backpedaled so hard in my life.
I was getting an elderly lady ready to go to PT (this was when I was a student). I was on the floor, looking all over for her R shoe. The pt said, "Honey, what are you doing?" I told her her I was looking for her R shoe. She said, "Honey, I haven't needed a R shoe for over twenty years!" Yep, she had a RBKA!