Stupid things said by your non-nurse significant other - page 16

This thread is started in honor of my darling husband, who told me this morning that he almost woke me early because he had a bowel obstruction. I said, "A bowel obstruction? Really? Tell me... Read More

  1. by   country mom
    My husband was raised on a dairy farm. When I was pregnant with our first child, he said, "whaddya mean they come out head first?" Cows are normally born front hooves first. He understood then why we couldn't just pull to help get the baby out.
  2. by   KeeperMom
    Quote from SSully
    Ok have any of you ever watched the comedian Jeff Dunham? Anyways he has a puppet named Achmed The Dead Terrorist, he is a skeleton. Ok we were watching him on comedy centeral one night and Achmed made a joke saying that he was having a bad time and he thought he had Scoliosis. My DH breaks out laughing like it is the FUNNIEST thing he has ever heard. Well I know my husband and I said "Do you know what Scoliosis is?" to which he replied, " Yea it is a flesh eating disorder, Achmed is a skeleton dear, shouldn't you know this being a nursing student?!" And continues to laugh as hard as he can.......Had to set him straight on that one....

    I KEEEL YOU!!!
  3. by   AngelfireRN
    OK, I'm an NP now, which to my DH, puts me right up there with the Almighty himself. There's not a whole lot I can't do, according to him. I was talking about having to go in for my yearly last week when he had his latest fit of brilliance....

    "Hey! You're a family NP now, you can do those!"

    "Yeah, your point, honey?"

    "Just do your own. Get one of the nurses to help you."

    "Honey, you DO realize what all goes on? I'd have to be a contortionist to pull that off!"

    "Well, you could walk them through it, right? I mean, wouldn't you be in the room?"


    Ya know, some days, it's not even worth getting out of bed. God love him.
  4. by   Psilant
    Quote from Feathers
    I'm still in the process of reading this thread. Some of these are hysterical! I'm a new grad, but have been a PCT on night shift for the last few years.

    One night a pt (approx. 40 y/o) put on his call light at about 0300-0400. So I go into his room to see what he needed. First words outta his mouth... "I didn't wake you up, did I?" *sigh*
    LOL. I have had several pts ask me where the nurses sleep at night.
  5. by   sharpeimom
    Quote from psilant
    lol. i have had several pts ask me where the nurses sleep at night.
    we check to see which patient seems to be sleeping the hardest and looks the most comfortable, then we kick him out of bed, so we can crawl in instead. j/k...
  6. by   redalert7777
    A few years ago, my husband was telling MY BOSS about his shoulder injury, and instead of him saying that he tore his labrum in his shoulder, he said he had torn his labia!!! I yelled his name at him in embarrasment, and as everyone looked at me, and my bright red face, nobody in the room knew what that meant! I then explained that it is female genatalia, and my female boss said, "Oh, well you shouldn't have said anything, I had no idea what it was." Even though she had one, she didn't know it. I'm still not sure what part is funnier, what my husband said, or that she didn't know what it meant either!
    Last edit by redalert7777 on Aug 16, '10 : Reason: I want to :)
  7. by   m_aidez
    Quote from redalert7777
    A few years ago, my husband was telling MY BOSS about his shoulder injury, and instead of him saying that he tore his labrum in his shoulder, he said he had torn his labia!!! I yelled his name at him in embarrasment, and as everyone looked at me, and my bright red face, nobody in the room knew what that meant! I then explained that it is female genatalia, and my female boss said, "Oh, well you shouldn't have said anything, I had no idea what it was." Even though she had one, she didn't know it
    Something similar happened to me. I was the person who said something embarrassing. My friend (who is a student nurse as well) and I were at our placement at a school and we were talking about our skin types (i.e, dry, oily and combination) during our break.

    Friend: My face is so dry. I have to moisturize at least x times during the winter.
    [The principal of the school came inside the room where we were taking our break]
    Me: Well, my FORESKIN gets oily! Note: I'm female. What I meant was my FOREHEAD. Oh my, Freudian slip mayhap? lmao

    I was beet red! And I tried to quickly redeem myself by saying "I mean, I mean FOREHEAD not FORESKIN!" multiple times but by then the damage was done and my friend was laughing at me. lol
  8. by   redalert7777
    Quote from m_aidez
    Something similar happened to me. I was the person who said something embarrassing. My friend (who is a student nurse as well) and I were at our placement at a school and we were talking about our skin types (i.e, dry, oily and combination) during our break.

    Friend: My face is so dry. I have to moisturize at least x times during the winter.
    [The principal of the school came inside the room where we were taking our break]
    Me: Well, my FORESKIN gets oily! Note: I'm female. What I meant was my FOREHEAD. Oh my, Freudian slip mayhap? lmao

    I was beet red! And I tried to quickly redeem myself by saying "I mean, I mean FOREHEAD not FORESKIN!" multiple times but by then the damage was done and my friend was laughing at me. lol
    OH man, I think THAT is one of the funniest things I've ever heard! I am crying from laughing right now!! Lmao!
  9. by   m_aidez
    When I looked back at where the principal was in the room, I don't think she heard what I said. But then again, I said it pretty loud. I think she was trying to be professional and she didn't want to embarrass me further lol. I'm glad I made you laugh.
  10. by   al7139
    I am unable to convince my SO that you can't get the flu from a flu shot.
    Last year he got a severe pain in his toe. I knew it was probably gout, but when I told him he needed to see a Doctor, he wondered why he spent all that money to put me through school if I couldn't help him...Needless to say that was a huge fight!
  11. by   carolinachick
    Quote from Psilant
    LOL. I have had several pts ask me where the nurses sleep at night.
    hahaahaha
  12. by   tcgirl
    Years ago, my pastor announced to his very large congregation that his 8 year old granddaughter was going to have surgery on her ears, to repair her "fallopian tubes"...!
  13. by   sharpeimom
    Quote from tcgirl
    years ago, my pastor announced to his very large congregation that his 8 year old granddaughter was going to have surgery on her ears, to repair her "fallopian tubes"...!

Must Read Topics


close