Silly random nursing thoughts, one sentence, NO JUDGMENTAL FOLKS ALLOWED - page 17

Rule is: One sentence. Random thought. Silly is great. Funny would rock. If you're going to be judgmental, GO TO ANOTHER THREAD! FUN ONLY HERE! Fomite is my new favorite word because it... Read More

  1. by   BostonTerrierLoverRN
    Does it irritate anyone but me when the checkout people slam your groceries around, or wad your clothing into a bag- I mean, those are freaking eggs, did you need a "Fragile" sign? Grrrrr!
  2. by   sharpeimom
    Why do you always to put the eggs in the same bag as the flour and the sugar?

    Yes, I heard it buzz too. The salesclerk left the $%^& shoplifting deterrent tag on and I had to make a second trip back here to have it removed!
  3. by   Do-over
    You know, the ad banner at the top of this page really gets to me at times. Usually, it is BSN program ads. Today, however, it keeps showing some sort of sheet one can insert under a pannus to prevent "skin-on-skin" irritation...

    I could stand to drop a few pounds, but it hasn't gotten to that point yet...I see it enough at work, and at risk of sounding mean - its kind of grossing me out!
  4. by   BostonTerrierLoverRN
    Re: Skin-on-skin Irritation Ad.

    Lol! They must not have CNAs that Baby Powder the heck out of them after a bedbath. Sometimes it looks like my patients are ready to be deep fried when I assess them. I fling back the covers to auscultate breathing sounds, and we both sneeze as a white cloud of corn starch fills the room! I would much rather stick one of those sheets in the rolls and crevices!!!
  5. by   Do-over
    Quote from BostonTerrierLoverRN
    Re: Skin-on-skin Irritation Ad.
    It's called a pillowcase!

    And, we don't get baby powder... The nystatin powder doesn't go airborne at least...
    Last edit by Do-over on Nov 24, '12 : Reason: To call off the grammar po-po
  6. by   BostonTerrierLoverRN
    I have found a chicken wing bone in a fat fold of a 560lb women tonight, she said,"gah, I am surprised, the cat must have hid that there. Now don't get me wrong- I'm a dog person, but do cats hide stuff??? I hope everyone has eaten supper Also, I found a small cat toy- so she may have a "unique" cat? Wuh, I kept searching for the dead kitten because the skin-on-skin inflammation was something akin to death, Vintage Cheddar, Crusty Butt, and Body Odor center, with a hint of Cabbage. I cleaned well with 4 PCTs holding up the belly, and then I left the patient to be breaded by the "Powder Puff" girls
  7. by   sharpeimom
    I remember visiting my grandmother after she'd showered, and not only was there powder fallout, but the overwhelming smell of Cashmere Bouquet soap and matching powder that went along with it!

    I think CB powder and Toujours Moi perfume are the prevailing LOL scents.
  8. by   BostonTerrierLoverRN
    Anything but moth balls!!
  9. by   brillohead
    Quote from BostonTerrierLoverRN
    I make a hand washing thread, and the nursing gods give ME a stomach virus? What? Really?
    Quote from BostonTerrierLoverRN
    Oh yeah it was experience from both ends
    My area's been afflicted with the gastrointestinal version of a clearance sale -- "Everything must GO!!!" -- this month too. Makes me want to wear sterile gloves to eat....
  10. by   sharpeimom
    Quote from brillohead
    My area's been afflicted with the gastrointestinal version of a clearance sale -- "Everything must GO!!!" -- this month too. Makes me want to wear sterile gloves to eat....
    I LOVE it, Brillohead! Now, we have a more formal (and...ahem... in proper medical terms) for the creeping crud that had my poor husband doubled up most of last night.
  11. by   BostonTerrierLoverRN
    I hope this wasn't what the Mayans were seeing, Lol

    I know of 6 hospitals on total lockdown around here because of the high levels of this "crud." They allow no visitors, and mask/glove cart is at both entrances where I work.

    Doctors office had this sign, "If you are experiencing Nausea, Vomiting, and Diarrhea, please knock on our side door, and a staff member will buzz you in. Please do not enter waiting area."

    I was toooooo sick to make it to a doctor, but I applaud those who could hold it in long enough to make it.

    I found sitting on the toilet with a 3 gallon bucket in my lap the best treatment for like 1/2 an eternity

    I knew I was better when I finally got to my knees to take small sips from the lavatory sink.
  12. by   sharpeimom
    This just seemed appropriate for this thread somehow! You can thank my cousin for this one.


    [FONT=helvetica]Maxine - Best one yet

    As we progress into 2013, I want to thank you all for your educational e-mails over the past year. I am totally screwed up now and have little chance of recovery.

    I can no longer open a bathroom door
    without using a paper towel, nor let the waitress put lemon slices in my ice water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel.

    I can't sit down on a hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed.

    I have trouble shaking hands
    with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking one's nose.

    Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because
    I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years.

    I can't touch any woman's handbag
    for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public toilet.

    I must send my special thanks
    for the email about rat poo in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with
    every envelope that needs sealing.

    now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

    I can't have a drink in a bar
    because I fear I'll wake up in a bathtub full of ice with my kidneys gone.

    I can't eat at KFC
    because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes, feet or feathers.

    I can't use cancer-causing deodorants
    even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

    Thanks to you
    I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

    Because of your concern ,
    I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

    I no longer buy
    fuel without taking someone along to watch the car, so a serial killer doesn't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.

    I no longer use Cling Wrap
    in the microwave because it causes seven different types of cancer.

    And thanks for letting me know
    I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face, disfiguring
    me for life.

    I no longer go to the cinema
    because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS when I sit down.

    I no longer go to shopping centres
    because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me..

    And I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a huge phone bill with calls to
    Jamaica , Uganda , Singapore and Uzbekistan ..

    Thanks to you
    I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big black snake could be lurking under the seat and cause me instant
    death when it bites my butt.

    And thanks to your great advice
    I can't ever pick up a coin dropped in the car park because it was probably placed
    there by a sex molester waiting to grab me as I bend over.

    I can't do any gardening
    because I'm afraid I'll get bitten by the Violin Spider and my hand will fall off.

    If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land

    on your head at 5:00 p.m. tomorrow afternoon, and the fleas from 120 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbours ex mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's best friend's beautician!

    Oh, and by the way...

    A German scientist from Argentina , after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity

    read their e-mails with their hand on the mouse

    Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.

    P. S. I now keep my toothbrush in the living room, because I was told by e-mail that water splashes over 6 ft. out of the toilet..

    [FONT="Arial Unicode MS"]�

  13. by   BostonTerrierLoverRN
    Let's take a moment, and be grateful that Spiders can't fly.