Nurses and marriage

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Reading some posts regarding retirement and worst financial mistakes and........

Marrying the wrong person(staying with or divorcing) seems to be a big hiccup for nurses-men who quit work now that they married a nurse(:twocents:kaching!?)

Do we want to fix under-achieving men or whatever their issues might be?

What are your thoughts?

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Find someone who has a better paying job than a nurse.

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Nursing students or nurses should be enough in tune with today's environment to be able to keep out of relationships where the man is looking for a meal ticket. When my daughter was in nursing school she ran into two of these jerks and told me she told one of them off to his face. He was arrogant enough to let it be known what his motives were.

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Specializes in Peri-Op.

Im a male so I dont think I will be married to any under achieving males.....

Aside from that, why the double standard, if things were flipped I am sure it would be ok for my wife to stay home, most women would probably even be jealous that she gets to stay at home. I wish she made more than me so I could stay at home or work part time. Maybe people should try harder to work out the marriage problems that are real rather than complain about money/who works/who doesnt work. If it really is a problem and they are really going broke while the spouse(dude/chick) REALLY sits on the couch at home all day, quit enabling them if it bothers you. Shut off the cable, stop bringing groceries home, dont give them money, turn off the internet, dont pay for their cars....

If they are abusive or adulterous then leave the relationship and dont use the kids as an excuse(or anything for that matter).

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Nursing students or nurses should be enough in tune with today's environment to be able to keep out of relationships where the man is looking for a meal ticket. When my daughter was in nursing school she ran into two of these jerks and told me she told one of them off to his face. He was arrogant enough to let it be known what his motives were.

I would hope that these nursing students would be in tune enough but you never know!

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Yeah, "love" is blind. My daughter has two kids so she is beyond the blind phase.

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Im a male so I dont think I will be married to any under achieving males.....

Aside from that, why the double standard, if things were flipped I am sure it would be ok for my wife to stay home, most women would probably even be jealous that she gets to stay at home. I wish she made more than me so I could stay at home or work part time. Maybe people should try harder to work out the marriage problems that are real rather than complain about money/who works/who doesnt work. If it really is a problem and they are really going broke while the spouse(dude/chick) REALLY sits on the couch at home all day, quit enabling them if it bothers you. Shut off the cable, stop bringing groceries home, dont give them money, turn off the internet, dont pay for their cars....

If they are abusive or adulterous then leave the relationship and dont use the kids as an excuse(or anything for that matter).

That's the point. Underachieving (whatever your definition) can happen on both sides. My husband wouldn't have been OK with me not reaching my full potential in my career or personally. We BOTH are achievers. I made a LOT more money than my husband for more than a decade BUT he had a career goal and was working his way to where he is now-even if his income wouldn't have increased he was achieving his version of success.

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Specializes in NICU.

I actually WISH my husband wanted to quit his job and stay home. We would save a fortune on daycare, the laundry would get done regularly, and I wouldn't have to grocery shop. He's really seems to enjoy all of those domestic things, but unfortuanatly he also loves his work, so it's a no go. Too bad.....

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Specializes in Peri-Op.

lol. I dont care what my wife does, she can chill at home or work if she wants. As long as she loves me that is enough. We have been broke together and now we are not broke together..... as long as we are together we are good to go..

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Specializes in Trauma Surgery, Nursing Management.
lol. I dont care what my wife does, she can chill at home or work if she wants. As long as she loves me that is enough. We have been broke together and now we are not broke together..... as long as we are together we are good to go..

You are so good! I agree with you...I don't care what my husband does as long as he contributes to our happiness and we have the same vision. If we truly work as a unit, it doesn't matter who stays home. If I am happy and he is happy, the world is golden. (Insert rainbows and unicorns here)

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Specializes in Trauma Surgery, Nursing Management.
Im a male so I dont think I will be married to any under achieving males.....

.

HAhahahahahaa! What about OVER achieving males, Argo?:coollook:

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This is kinda like guy bashing . Now that being said I'm a guy yeap you got it. In my Nursing class i seen relationships go down the drain what is it with Nursing School and Divorce. Or the nursing field in general some of the women i have dated i can state the same thing why do they want a meal ticket. Why do they think because they are married or even dating a nurse and they work at walmart its ok. I Think for women its more so how they look at their guy always wanting more and look at their future. Can i be happy for the next 60 yrs and they have a independence in place as a nurse. Most women like the idea they can now pay for them selfs with out the help of a man. I think in both cases we just want or partner to step up. I'm making so much now i want you to do the same or even better. And for Men i think some feel they supported you through your Nursing its time to get the rewards so they do stop work or go to work part time kinda like Look i helped my wife and or my girlfriend become a nurse now she can support me. But the type of support guys are doing is wrong. Its should be She can now support me as in I can go back to school or go for a new job or so on In relationships people seperate the levels they should be at. What might start out as hand and hand as soon as a partner reaches a goal they seem to leave the other partner behind. So is it really under achiving? The relationship was fine before you became a Nursing Student so what changed? Some people think becoming a nurse is a way to break out to start a new life. I have found that most nursing students take being a Nurse and make it a life changing ordeal. So with that being said It's easy to to see or even put a label on your spouse or partner.. These are my thoughts use them as you wish ... Anthony

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