We've all been there. If you haven't yet, you will. Some of us were sweating. Some of us were shaking. Some of us were quiet. The one thing that we did have in common is that we were all scared. Here we are, stepping on a floor, full of patients that we needed to take care of but we knew NOTHING. "Go find your nurse" is what our instructor told us. Slowly, we strolled to the different pods and introduced ourselves.
As I approached the nurse that I was to shadow the entire day, I became increasingly relaxed. She was an older nurse that looked mothering and I believed that I was going to learn a lot that day. "Ms. Martha? Hi. I'm Charlotte. I'll be your student nurse today" I widened my eyes and mustered the best smile possible, considering it is 6:30am. I was greeted with a blank stare, followed with an up and down glance that could make a dead man's veins run cold. She finally said, "Hmmmm. I already have a student nurse that is in her last semester. I need to focus on her and help her graduate. Where's your clinical instructor? Can you just be with her? If you have questions, you can ask. I just need to focus on my other student."
Let's fast forward this day. My patient went to dialysis, meaning I will not have anything to do for 4-6 hours of my 10 hour day. Because my patient was gone, I volunteered my services for her other patients. I volunteered to empty foley bags, change bedsheets or whatever other tasks or errands that needed to be done. I asked questions. After the attempts of basically begging her to let me help her were denied, I even asked if I could just watch her and shadow her without even being acknowledged. (Mind you this was my first day. I know I sounded like a sad puppy but I had no idea of what else to do). Unsurprisingly, she shot those requests down as well. This is only a small insight to how my first day went.
This is living proof that the advice that some nurses give about why nurses eat their young and all of things to do to avoid it is all FALSE!! "Make yourself available". Did that. "Ask questions and act interested". Did that. "Make sure to not come off as a know it all". Did that. "Sometimes, nurses are very busy and teaching a student will disrupt them blah blah blah!"
If you are a nurse and do not want a nursing student, JUST SAY IT! It is very unfortunate that there are some nurses out there that do not want to teach. The cornerstone of nursing is teaching. You must teach the family and patient constantly during their visit. Also, "each one, teach one" should be taken to heart. Think about when you first became a nurse. You were frightened and scared.
Fellow nursing comrades, if this has happened to you or if this ever happens to in the future, take it with stride. It is difficult to work with and hard to not take it personally. Just remember that day and vow to never EVER treat someone that is willing to learn and help with disgrace.
Specializes in Mental Health, Gerontology, Palliative.
Desperate to be a victim ��! I'm far from a victim! Overburdened with one patient and just came from a 14 day vacation? Ok.
And this is the problem with students, they think they know whats going on when they have no damm clue
I spent the better part of six-seven hours of my eight hour shift on one patient the other day and certainly had no time for a student or to spend any time giving them any direction for anything else
to the person who wrote this entry, most nurses don't eat other nurses, we personalize it and perceive it that way but really it's just a high stress field and sometimes we project onto each other without knowing it. She doesn't sound like a mean nurse at all she sounds, well, busy. She told you she had another student right away because she probably knew it wasn't gonna be the best day to teach you. Your instructor should have done something different.
I think this topic has reached the point of beating a dead horse, but I have one new angle to touch on.
Our memories are unreliable. Memories are tainted SO MUCH by our own personal feelings. If you asked this nurse or your CI to recount this day, the answers would be different than yours, and none of the 3 would be 100% correct. You were extremely anxious and fearful when you had this experience. I don't want to invalidate your feelings, because clinical experiences are extremely anxiety-provoking for most of us, but rather I'd like you to consider that if you'd had the same interaction at a time when you were less emotionally-charged, you might remember it differently.
Also, this nurse may have treated you poorly, but you initial post does not contain any evidence of this. Since we were not present, all of our information about how you were treated comes from this initial post, in which you did not give us any evidence for your claims about this nurse. If you're going to post on here about a specific experience/situation, it's important to give thought to what facts should be included, and also to your tone.
I feel compelled to add, given all the talk about the added work/stress/time taking a student adds to a busy day, that there are good things about having a student as well. I have several students a semester (though I work in a much different environment than most here) and while it adds work for me my practice also benefits from it. I just feel it is important to acknowledge that there is an up-side as well.
I am fortunate that I can control who/what/where/when students come, which I feel all nurses taking students should be bale to do, and I also do get a educational credit.
I feel compelled to add, given all the talk about the added work/stress/time taking a student adds to a busy day, that there are good things about having a student as well. I have several students a semester (though I work in a much different environment than most here) and while it adds work for me my practice also benefits from it. I just feel it is important to acknowledge that there is an up-side as well.
I am fortunate that I can control who/what/where/when students come, which I feel all nurses taking students should be bale to do, and I also do get a educational credit.
Amen, amen and AMEN. It's the control issue. To step out of a grueling report with 6 problematic patients and then be blindsided with the addition of a student to your load can feel unbearable.
And let me also add that one of the main reasons that busy nurses are uncomfortable with students is that most of us experienced nurses really WANT to be good mentors. We don't want to be shooing the student away most of the day or relegating them to changing sheets. We (most of the time) truly want to help teach them. But on any given day, we know by 7:01am whether or not that type of interaction is even going to be possible.
if i am reading this all correctly, i believe what this "new grad" is trying to tell students is to 1). not take it personally if something like this ever happens to you and 2). don't worry and move on you will survive. Nursing school is hard. It tests not only your book knowledge and skills but your character. But this is what you signed up for. RIGHT? While i understand the multitude of posts from others pointing out how this one individual does seem to be a bit focused on herself and playing a bit of the victim, AND it is legitimate to help ALL future nurses understand that as a licensed nurse you will have to protect yourself, your time but more importantly your patients, but geez, let's give her a break. She's just trying to share some of her experiences so that the next student who encounters this type of scenario will not panic knowing she is not the first to go through this. FAIR?
Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.
if i am reading this all correctly, i believe what this "new grad" is trying to tell students is to 1). not take it personally if something like this ever happens to you and 2). don't worry and move on you will survive. Nursing school is hard. It tests not only your book knowledge and skills but your character. But this is what you signed up for. RIGHT? While i understand the multitude of posts from others pointing out how this one individual does seem to be a bit focused on herself and playing a bit of the victim, AND it is legitimate to help ALL future nurses understand that as a licensed nurse you will have to protect yourself, your time but more importantly your patients, but geez, let's give her a break. She's just trying to share some of her experiences so that the next student who encounters this type of scenario will not panic knowing she is not the first to go through this. FAIR?
So you think the original post was just melodramatic and poorly written? That it wasn't about victimhood but resilience? OK. I'll try to see it in that light.
It isn't that the term was too harsh, it is that the term was completely inaccurate for the situation that you described. . .
This is what sticks in our collective craw . . ."Nurses Eating Nursing Students" or as usually stated "Nurses eat Their Young".
As in all nurses are mean and nasty to new nurses. You cannot make a general statement like that without getting some feedback here on AN. We've come across the term NETY so often here and many of us are ready with a counter-argument.
I've seen no responses to the OP that rise to the level of being bullying or mean. Straightforward and blunt maybe, but no one on this thread has been "mean" to the OP.
But then I'm a crusty old nurse who has seen this argument over and over and over.
Just stop using NETY . . . and simply describe what happened to you personally in that instance. Please?
She's just trying to share some of her experiences so that the next student who encounters this type of scenario will not panic knowing she is not the first to go through this. FAIR?
Except she's giving students REASON to panic by telling them that no matter what you do you will be treated badly. She isn't giving them any suggestions on how to cope or avoid the situation entirely. In fact she may very well have created the situation herself. It's fine to share a bad experience but it only has value to others if you also share what you did to handle it. Otherwise it's the equivalent of holding a flashlight under your chin while scaring children with tales of The Hook.
Except she's giving students REASON to panic by telling them that no matter what you do you will be treated badly. She isn't giving them any suggestions on how to cope or avoid the situation entirely. In fact she may very well have created the situation herself. It's fine to share a bad experience but it only has value to others if you also share what you did to handle it. Otherwise it's the equivalent of holding a flashlight under your chin while scaring children with tells of The Hook.
You make a great point that the tone of the original post may cause prospective students to panic. However, I don't necessarily believe that advice have to given in order to help others. Sometimes it is comforting just to know that someone has gone through a similar experience as you. Maybe a nursing student will read this thread and think: oh maybe I shouldn't take it personally that that nurse the other day in clinical didn't seem to want me around because it happens to everyone at some point. OP, is this maybe what you were going for?
You make a great point that the tone of the original post may cause prospective students to panic. However, I don't necessarily believe that advice have to given in order to help others. Sometimes it is comforting just to know that someone has gone through a similar experience as you. Maybe a nursing student will read this thread and think: oh maybe I shouldn't take it personally that that nurse the other day in clinical didn't seem to want me around because it happens to everyone at some point. OP, is this maybe what you were going for?
Except it's completely clear that the OP DID take it personally. Not only that it's been at least 2 years since this event happened and it apparently still weighs on her mind. How is that reassuring? I know when someone has made it through a difficult situation similar to mine the only way it makes me feel better is when they tell me "yeah it totally sucks but you are going to be okay". It's like when women tell first time pregnant women their delivery horror stories. I've seen this happen at endless baby showers. Seriously why do people do that? I'm pretty sure those terrified new moms-to-be aren't thinking "yay, so glad she told me that so I know someone else got through it. I'm so relieved now" It's the exact same thing!
Tenebrae, BSN, RN
2,021 Posts
And this is the problem with students, they think they know whats going on when they have no damm clue
I spent the better part of six-seven hours of my eight hour shift on one patient the other day and certainly had no time for a student or to spend any time giving them any direction for anything else