Things you'd LOVE to be able to tell patients, and get away with it. - page 91

:spin:Just curious as to what you would say. Mine goes something like this: Hi, my name is AngelfireRN, I'll be your nurse tonight. I am not a waitress, nor am I your slave. Yelling... Read More

  1. by   cherrybreeze
    To the patient who doesn't want any "fat, unattractive" nurses, since we should all be "fit and healthy" since we're supposed to be "setting examples" for our patients (I about died when I heard he said this):

    You're 49 years old, and you keep getting mad at us because we keep mistaking your MOTHER for your wife or your sister......what does that tell YOU? Also, I guess having all those "good examples" over the years hasn't helped you after all, since you are in fact quite overweight and lazy yourself.

    Maybe I only want to take care of patients who aren't momma's boys, but we don't always get what we want. Tough break, jerkface.
  2. by   squeakykitty
    you are not entitled!!!!
  3. by   ilmbg
    If there are patients who only want 'young, good lookin' nurses....he would be out of luck on my floor- I think we are all over 50!

    And if patients can request young/good lookin' nurses- well, I want a Tom Selleck look alike- a young version for a patient!
  4. by   KarafromPhilly
    For a few, select patients: Guess what? We know what the hell we're talking about when we tell you what to do to stay out of the hospital, and we know you don't do any of it. Don't even have the nerve to act surprised that you're back in the ICU, again, because nobody who knows you is the least bit surprised. We're tired of you. Aren't you tired of us?
  5. by   CseMgr1
    My sister actually said this to my BIL last week, after he demanded that she "get his blanket and cover him up" for the 900th time:

    "You're not going to start this (censored) again. Get it yourself".

    He has been doing it ever since.
  6. by   talaxandra
    I think your elevated blood sugar is less likely to be due to the nurses pushing your Meropenem too quickly and more likely to the chocolate bar and family bag of chips I can see th wrappers of in your bin. Just a wild guess.
  7. by   blueheaven
    One thing I really, really hate is getting a bu$$hole patient who is nasty, demanding, rude, totally oppositional to all medical necessities for his care (like IVs, telemetry, other formas of monitoring) THEN to top it off threaten to leave. Like we are going to beg him to stay YEAH RIGHT! Of course this type of PITA never makes the move toward the AMA paper but continues to make everyone's life hell including his family (sometimes). Then there are the family members who are worse than the patient!!

    Then there are families who threaten to take their "loved one" to another hospital even though nursing staff and physcians are doing everything they can for the patient and there are no screw ups or real issues. Usually when they find out that it is up to them to foot the transport bill, actually find a doctor to accept them and possibly be responsible for the first hospital's bill they hush (darn!) My thing is "Let me show you where medical records is located and call you an ambo!!"

    My thing is, get out the AMA form, have it ready to roll and pray that they boogie. Tell them "Don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya!!!!!"

    Same turkeys end up later back in the emergency room whining again. SHEESH
    Last edit by blueheaven on Jun 3, '09
  8. by   I love my cat!
    Quote from blueheaven
    My thing is, get out the AMA form, have it ready to roll and pray that they boogie. Tell them "Don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya!!!!!"

    Same turkeys end up later back in the emergency room whining again. SHEESH

    Ok, that was very funny! Thanks for posting that because you made my day!!!
  9. by   angiendev1
    When I was a student doing preceptors, I had a patient whose iv infiltrated and a new one had to be placed. After removing the old one, I placed the other one and a small amount (less then a half of drop) came out of the cath hub before I placed the tubing. The guy looks at me serious as he could be and said, " i have extremly rare blood and i don't appreciate you wasting it." Unfortunatly i tend to have this problem where things just pop out of my mouth, and I looked at him and said, " Wow, you mean i could have collected that drop of B pos. blood instead of wiping it off and quit my career as a nurse and sold it on ebay". The RN I was working with just smiled and said, " Dang, I could have been a multi-millionare by now" The guys wife wife laughed.
  10. by   nerdtonurse?
    Don't "threaten" me with saying you're going to leave. Honey, you've been so hateful, everyone on the shift would help you pack (since you apparently brought ALL your earthly belongings), and we'd fight over who got to drive you home.

    What I actually said was, "Ma'am, dayshift told me how unhappy you've been here. I've already spoken with your physician, and he said that he'd like you to stay to complete your treatment, but that you can leave AMA any time you like." She didn't threaten to leave any more....unfortunately.
  11. by   SoundofMusic
    Please don't call me . . . honey. I am not your "honey" and I really wish you'd stop treating me like your wait staff.

    I am a professional with a college degree. Two of them, in fact. I am likely more educated than you and was also one of 70 accepted into a nursing school program with over 400 applicants. I am an intelligent woman -- a nurse. I deserve more respect than that.

    Honestly, nurses with BSN's have a higher level of education than most Americans -- yet they treat us like idiots. I don't get it.
  12. by   RNDreamer
    How would you feel if someone wiped themself, then angily threw their poo filled tissue at you?

    Then, why in the H E double hockey sticks did you throw yours at me?
  13. by   ElvishDNP
    No, I'm sorry....if you are exclusively breastfeeding and do not want your baby to get any bottles or formula in *anywayshapeorform*, he cannot stay in the nursery for eight hours. I am not currently lactating and can't help ya out any....