Things you'd LOVE to be able to tell patients, and get away with it. - page 85

:spin:Just curious as to what you would say. Mine goes something like this: Hi, my name is AngelfireRN, I'll be your nurse tonight. I am not a waitress, nor am I your slave. Yelling... Read More

  1. by   RNsRWe
    Quote from PeachPie
    You are not a precious, unique snowflake who deserves to have its butt kissed. You are an organic rotting meatbag just like the rest of us.
    OMG, ROFLMAO!!!! "organic rotting meatbag"!!! Now THAT'S something I'll have to remember to use!
  2. by   twistedpupchaser
    To the Pt being monitored "Just in Case" waiting for a second Troponin with gastric reflux, (New Dr decided to go cardiac pathway). "Hold your breath for 20 seconds and your Dr will come and see you."

    Oh yes, I did say that... his Dr and half of the floor staff visited him at a fast pace! (No they still don't know that I initiated this, the Pt had a feeling it was better to not "dob me in".)
  3. by   Magsulfate
    I know I've posted here a few times before,, but here's a new one.. because they happen almost every day that I go to work.. lol...........

    Thanks (NOT!) for telling us that "the other hospital always let me untie her hand and hold it" so that we would untie her only good hand and you would let her pull out her JUST PLACED THAT DAY feeding tube out of her belly.

    I know that you love your daughter, even though she is 50 years old, she had a massive stroke, she probably doesn't understand that a tube is feeding her and that thing in her throat is there to keep her alive, that's why she keeps trying to pull it out. Or maybe she does.

    NO, I can't untie her arm, and no, you will not stay the night, you have from 8am to 8pm to sit at her side, you can't sit there all night like you did last night when I wasn't here. It is against the rules. SOrry, I didn't make the rules, we have them so that we can lock the doors at night because management is too cheap to hire a security guard around here. They'll swear it's not a money issue, they'll say it's because we lock the doors and no one can get in anyway so what's the use in having security.

    And finally, for a different patient..........
    Alzhiemers is a "progressive" disease. We are doing the best we can. But the reason for her decline is not because the nurses and doctors here are terrible. It is because your mom is progressively getting worse. She can't swallow because she has a stricture. We didn't place her NPO because we are lazy and don't want to feed her. So, please, when you come here, don't feed her that stuff you brought in from The Olive Garden. When you left yesterday she coughed up a chunk of noodle and a piece of meatball. I can still hear a noodle rattling in her throat.
  4. by   southernbeegirl
    To the daughter of my LOL that pulled her IV out yesterday...

    Stop coming in the room saying "have you not got her IV in YET??". No ma'am I YOU want to do it?
  5. by   ERRN92
    How about..."yes, please do call Johnny Cochran's office (theres one down the street). I'd be glad to look up the number for you. And no, you cant take the medical chart home with you!!! it doesnt belong to you, it belongs to the hospital. But, you are welcome to go thru medical records and get a copy blah blah blah. Im shaking in my shoes.!!
  6. by   LRICH94
    "Rifampin and fusidic acid? Sounds like someone got their medical degree from Google University. "

    It's amazing how many family members get their medical degree from WebMD...if only it were that easy!!!
  7. by   chicookie
    How many times do I have to tell you DO NOT GET OUT OF BED WITHOUT ASSISTANCE!?! I know you remember that, you remember that you can have your medication every 3 hours A.E.B you calling me every 2.5 hours! SO STAY IN BED!

    Not only do I hate your doctor for coming in at 6:15pm to tell me to discharge you, but I hate that he was just in here and you didn't ask him for any pain medications and now that he is gone and I am ready to give report and all i have to do is give you this stupid paper, you ask me for your prescription for pain medication! HE WAS JUST IN HERE!! Plus to top it off you are asking me for not only that but a bedside commode and a walker!?! You have been here two weeks and you didn't ask PT or OT!?! Now you want me to fulfill all your requests!?! Lady/dude all I want to do is go home and now I have to stay after because half done discharges can't be taken over by nightshift!!
    Talk about frustrating..........
  8. by   ERRN92
    ........"no you cant get up and go to bathroom. You will have to learn to use the bedpan until your bolus dilantin has had time to take effect" They come into the ER because theyve been seizing today - but think they should still be allowed to get up and walk to the bathroom where they will close the door and sometimes lock it!!! There is no worse feeling than listening to someone seize inside a locked bathroom by themselves.
  9. by   PAERRN20
    No I will not allow you to drink mountain dew and eat chips with your 12/10 abd pain.....geeze!
  10. by   Thankful RN,BSN
    I am not here to entertain you. So, stop playing on the call light.
  11. by   aloevera
    Do you complain all the time at your job, your home??? or is it just here???
  12. by   psalm
    Quote from aloevera
    Do you complain all the time at your job, your home??? or is it just here???

    Excellent observation! I would have given you TWO thanks if I could have for this comment!
  13. by   talaxandra
    "I'd rather treat you as an adult but your acting like a tanty child forces me into a paternalistic role - if you want to get better swallow the meds, get out of bed and do your physio without me needing to cajole and coax you every step of the way. And quit whining. You're recovering from surgery - it's not meant to be pleasant. If you want to spend the rest of your life lying in a nursing home you're certainly going the right way about it."