No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

Nurses General Nursing

Published

I thought those words earlier today after reading another thread that started to go sideways because some had an issue with the OP. This seems to be happening frequently; the OP will start a thread with the best of intentions; then someone responds with personal attacks against the OP (and misses the point of the post); then others pile on additional negative posts against the OP,

rendering the thread useless.

I wonder if those who try to debate the poster and not the post do anything to make AN a more welcoming place. Do they share their knowledge or experience with others? What have they done to become a valued member of AN?

I'm sure I'll be criticized for starting this thread. I may even have a few people take shots at me. I'm tough; if I can handle cancer, I can handle criticism from anonymous posters on a forum.

So how have you helped to make AN a positive place where nurses can learn from each other?

Specializes in Complex pedi to LTC/SA & now a manager.
I see you understand what I am saying. And I think we could potentially be losing something of great value here....

Exactly. I loved working night shift in the ER as a tech with the crustiest old bat society years ago. Sadly many of those skilled, brilliant nurses have passed on. Their wisdom and experience, dedication & teamwork still affect my nursing today nearly 2 decades later. Sure at times they were blunt and it stung but 99.9% they were right. And if they were wrong they admitted it.

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Specializes in Complex pedi to LTC/SA & now a manager.

I think the fact that the seasoned experienced members turned the intended insult "crusty old bat" into a badge of honor speak a lot of their character.

If they don't return this site will have lost a valuable resource and future nurses will lose their insight, passion and wisdom.

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I think the fact that the seasoned experienced members turned the intended insult "crusty old bat" into a badge of honor speak a lot of their character.

If they don't return this site will have lost a valuable resource and future nurses will lose their insight, passion and wisdom.

..... Exactly.....

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Specializes in critical care, ER,ICU, CVSURG, CCU.
Crusty old bat. An insult slung at the seasoned members when a young member didn't get the answer/aw poor baby answer they were seeking and the seasoned nurses injected a dose of reality and offered truth/reality orientation. The season members turned it around and wear the title proudly as members of the crusty old bat society.

being an RN for 42+years, i need the application for the "membership as crusty old bat"

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

Sallyrnrrt and RNIBCLC - we've always been a self-designated member group. So far nobody has erred in their decision . . .and nobody has been kicked out for not being crusty enough. Welcome!

We also welcome aspiring COBs, auxiliary COBs and pretty much any like-minded people who want to join up! :up:

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Specializes in critical care, ER,ICU, CVSURG, CCU.

thanks nursel56, :rolleyes: i had sorta self appointed me :roflmao:

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​When you realize it's not worth the effort, and that sharing that hard earned wisdom winds up making you the source of derision, then there's no point in sharing.

Yep.

Was perusing the threads, and found a newer member posing a question (NCLEX studying, wanted correct answer). Another new member answered the question with a question, clearly designed to make the first person think about it again, and maybe allow the second one to act as a sounding board for rationales. So the first person responds, without giving rationales. Again the second person asks, in another way, such that the OP would 'think through' and come up with an answer. At least, that's what *I* saw, and was glad to see such a process occurring. Was about to offer my own help, first time in awhile, considering recent hx of abuse of those offering assistance on this site.

Until, that is, the OP derided the person who was trying to HELP him/her with a nasty comment. A "Don't Teach Me, Just Give Me the Answers, Lady" kind of thing.

Sat on my hands for a minute, then pressed the 'BACK' button....

Too bad, as I DO know the answer, and WAS willing to share--until the nasty comment :(

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Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
Yep.

Was perusing the threads, and found a newer member posing a question (NCLEX studying, wanted correct answer). Another new member answered the question with a question, clearly designed to make the first person think about it again, and maybe allow the second one to act as a sounding board for rationales. So the first person responds, without giving rationales. Again the second person asks, in another way, such that the OP would 'think through' and come up with an answer. At least, that's what *I* saw, and was glad to see such a process occurring. Was about to offer my own help, first time in awhile, considering recent hx of abuse of those offering assistance on this site.

Until, that is, the OP derided the person who was trying to HELP him/her with a nasty comment. A "Don't Teach Me, Just Give Me the Answers, Lady" kind of thing.

Sat on my hands for a minute, then pressed the 'BACK' button....

Too bad, as I DO know the answer, and WAS willing to share--until the nasty comment :(

You are learning, grasshopper...you are learning. Now you need to send me a PM so I can see this snarkastic thread.

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LOL! But of course :)

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I would just like to add that the snarky/snide comments suck. There is a difference between constructive criticism and plain ole criticism. I started a thread this past week and received A LOT of supportive comments as well as suggestions, I also got one where the poster told me to "grow up", and let me tell you that one comment hit me like a ton of bricks. It was completely insensitive and unnecessary. And I've seen similar comments and attacks on other threads. People don't post on here looking to be attacked and it's sad it happens.

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Specializes in Complex pedi to LTC/SA & now a manager.
You are learning, grasshopper...you are learning. Now you need to send me a PM so I can see this snarkastic thread.

Me too. I'm curious.

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I would just like to add that the snarky/snide comments suck. There is a difference between constructive criticism and plain ole criticism. I started a thread this past week and received A LOT of supportive comments as well as suggestions, I also got one where the poster told me to "grow up", and let me tell you that one comment hit me like a ton of bricks. It was completely insensitive and unnecessary. And I've seen similar comments and attacks on other threads. People don't post on here looking to be attacked and it's sad it happens.

And I'll bet that the person who posts like that wonders why people stop offering to help....?

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