No alcohol. NONE

Nurses Recovery

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Hey everyone!

I am brand spankin new in recovery and just signed my contract last week. I am in recovery for opioid use. I understand the reason behind not using any mood altering substance while in the program. However, just because we understand something doesn't make it easy. This past weekend was so hard for me.. and not because of narcotics. I am 26 and live in Charlotte with my boyfriend. Of course.. this past weekend we met up with friends for dinner and immediately I'm questioned as to why I didn't order a drink with dinner. Then everyone wants to check out a new brewery downtown but I am DREADING IT because I know I can't drink and have to come up with ANOTHER explanation. I guess I didn't realize how often alcohol is involved in my social life. I don't care to quit drinking, but I guess its just the CONSTANT excuses I will have to give to people which will be a constant reminder of my mistakes. I'm also a little upset about no champagne on my wedding day or margaritas on my honeymoon. How have you guys delt with this? Has it been difficult for anyone else? Thanks!

Specializes in OR.

The 5 day ones seem to frequently be the precursor to holding you hostage long enough to find out if there's $$$ to be had. In my case it was claimed to be for "neuropsychiatric testing" but in reality was just the first week of the useless 90 day babysitting crap that everyone got shoved through. That place was 75 miles from home and I only packed clothes for a week. There was nothing about that testing that could not have been done in a few hours. What they did was a bunch of multiple choice CBT tests. To be honest I am not quite sure what qualifies as neuropsychiatric testing, but I don't think it's that.

For an even sicker bit of dark humor....the practice where my psychiatrist is does that same kind of neuropsychiatric testing AND has a doc that does evals for IPN. But they (IPN) don't tell you that. I would not have known that had I not casually asked my own doc. They are not affiliated with any treatment center or anything, either. They also are 6 miles from my house and take my insurance.

Hindsight has 20/20 vision, I guess....

Specializes in Psych, Addictions, SOL (Student of Life).

actually when people who I have known my entire life and who knew me in the salad days ask the incredibly rude and intrusive question "Why aren't you drinking?" I smile sweetly and say " I'm actually allergic to alcohol." if they continue with the rude and intrusive "What kind of reaction do you have? " I say "when I drink I get naked and dance on tables, happens every time!" That usually shuts them up. but seriously most people wont care if you don't drink as long as you don't expect them not to. As my daddy used to say you wouldn't worry so much about what other people thought of you if you realized how rarely they did!"

You may find however that life can be pretty sweet without alcohol and changing up what you do for entertainment isn't a bad idea. Probably not the best idea to hang out at bars and breweries but a nice restaurant where there's lots of non alcoholic options is a good way to go. BTW and this may be TMI , the things that you enjoyed while drinking , especially sex are actually pretty fun with a clear head.

Hppy

You could just tell them you're trying to get healthier and decided cutting out alcohol was a good place to start. You could throw in something about trying to eat better or exercise too. Usually people will get start talking about different diets or the next 5k, what they are doing or did, or heard about, successes/failures, etc..and get side tracked off the alcohol. I wouldn't order the Blooming Onion after saying it, but...it sounds like something reasonable, and then you don't have to keep thinking up reasons. Just be loose-y goose-y about it. You're self conscious about it and plus not doing it leaves a void, so it seems like a bigger deal to you than others, even if they poke you a little about it. Also, once you stop drinking for a while it won't be so integral to your activities and you'll start forgetting about it. Reminds me of years ago when I quit smoking. I didn't realize it before I quit, but my whole life revolved around when I was going to smoke next. Going for coffee, having a drink, weddings, up to the cabin; all very un-fun when I first quit smoking. Driving or studying was nearly unbearable. Lol. You might you appreciate the teatotaling after a while. There is something to be said about being clear minded. Good luck. :)

The 5 day ones seem to frequently be the precursor to holding you hostage long enough to find out if there's $$$ to be had. In my case it was claimed to be for "neuropsychiatric testing" but in reality was just the first week of the useless 90 day babysitting crap that everyone got shoved through. That place was 75 miles from home and I only packed clothes for a week. There was nothing about that testing that could not have been done in a few hours. What they did was a bunch of multiple choice CBT tests. To be honest I am not quite sure what qualifies as neuropsychiatric testing, but I don't think it's that.

For an even sicker bit of dark humor....the practice where my psychiatrist is does that same kind of neuropsychiatric testing AND has a doc that does evals for IPN. But they (IPN) don't tell you that. I would not have known that had I not casually asked my own doc. They are not affiliated with any treatment center or anything, either. They also are 6 miles from my house and take my insurance.

Hindsight has 20/20 vision, I guess....

Catsmeow, I appreciate the truth you drop. I called that investigator the beginning of this week and left a message saying I had called the evaluators as I was told to. I have not received a call back to even know how to get this ball rolling. Unfortunately (more for me than them i am sure), there is NO money to be had from me. Or my family. And if they try that nonsense with calling my family, they'll see through that ****. I have been sober for three years and in fact have been living with my mother pretty much since having my child and going through school. So I have had eyes on me to see I have been sober. Suggesting further treatment (which I am scared of because as you and I have sort of discussed- just because they can) would be criminal! I keep telling my self that just can't happen but who knows!

If you were caught using IV narcotics at work, it sounds like you have a serious addiction. I am not a big fan of the AA model, but there is a saying that rings true for many - sober people, sober places. Also, if your friends are all wondering why you are not drinking (meaning that you usually did drink), I am wondering if ETOH played a larger role in your life than you thought.

Specializes in Med Surg Tele.

You'll get used to it. You'll come up with an answer that you like. Also, you start to realize that people really don't care. They're more worried about themselves.

One of the things I've learned in A&P is that the blood brain barrier that protects the brain and nerves is very impermeable. If you allow these things into your mind, you're only creating damage. The typical reaction from that is "Well, we're all going to die some die".

No, that is not true. People who smoke, play sports, or drink MASSIVE amounts of alcohol will die earlier in life than those who did neither of those three things.

Humans have the ability to make unique decisions other mammals are incapable of doing. We can speak, create things with perfected measurements yet we destroy are uniqueness by drinking things that slip through the blood brain barrier so easily and cause chaos and instability in the brain. Light alcohol is ok. Too much is not ok.

This is one of the things that piss me off about nurses is that they don't remember their foundation. If they remembered what they learned in their pre-reqs, they'd probably have less to worry about such as patient ignorance and personal problems.

The science behind your decisions is there. If you do drugs or drink alcohol beyond reasonable amounts, you're ruining your life. It's not good stuff to do. I don't drink alcohol for many reasons: 1. My dad drinks or used to drink and it made him become an ******* in ways you'd want to call CPS. 2. It causes organ damage and brain damage. 3. It can kill people such as drunk driving. 4. I don't want to be like my dad. Someone who has no self-control and decision making.

Specializes in Varied.

The road to recovery will have many bumps, this is just a small one. Find a reason you like. You don't have to always discuss your situation unless its something you are ready for. I hope you find what works best for you.

You don't owe anyone an excuse for not drinking. I only say no thanks I don't feel like it today.

I totally agree with Oogie. You don't owe anybody an explanation!!!! I'm sure those closest to you in life know what you are going through & the rest of the world can suck it. I often answer inappropriate personal inquiries with the age old "that's none of your business" or "what are you writing a book?" especially to nosey nurses. Anyway I like to drink hence my DUI. When I drink I could care less what the people I'm with are drinking as that's their choice and a decision by another adult in full control of his decisions. I think the biggest problem nurses have & for nursing in general is the inability to form healthy boundaries with the rest of the world. Everybody doesn't need to know everything about you or by extension approve of your decisions. Good Luck!!!

Specializes in OR.
I totally agree with Oogie. You don't owe anybody an explanation!!!! I'm sure those closest to you in life know what you are going through & the rest of the world can suck it. I often answer inappropriate personal inquiries with the age old "that's none of your business" or "what are you writing a book?" especially to nosey nurses. Anyway I like to drink hence my DUI. When I drink I could care less what the people I'm with are drinking as that's their choice and a decision by another adult in full control of his decisions. I think the biggest problem nurses have & for nursing in general is the inability to form healthy boundaries with the rest of the world. Everybody doesn't need to know everything about you or by extension approve of your decisions. Good Luck!!!

Spanked has an extremely good point. What is it about us nurses that nursing becomes our life. There is going out for breakfast after the night shift with our fellow nurses, etc. Instead of people who happen to be nurses. We become nurses who happen to be people on the side. Shoot, even the the vanity license plate on my car advertises that I am a nurse (now that I think about it, perhaps I should have that changed. On the other hand it has gotten me out of a speeding ticket or two;) )

Instead of a job that can be turned off at clocking out, for some of us it becomes us. Then when we fail to be able to turn off that identity we start that slow burn and don't know how to cope. Some turn to those unhealthy coping mechanisms. Some of us that already have illnesses to deal with that require special attention to coping skills may get there sooner.....and we hit that wall and burst into flames. Then frequently, our colleagues, instead of pulling us from the flames, pour gasoline on us......

I wonder if, back in school, Time spent conversing on self care and coping skills and not letting nursing consume you would be worthwhile. We are caring people by nature ( if you went into this for the money, you can only clean enough code browns before it ain't worth it...) When we need to be cared for, we find it isn't there....

Sorry if I am waxing philosophical again.

One of the things I've learned in A&P is that the blood brain barrier that protects the brain and nerves is very impermeable. If you allow these things into your mind, you're only creating damage. The typical reaction from that is "Well, we're all going to die some die".

No, that is not true. People who smoke, play sports, or drink MASSIVE amounts of alcohol will die earlier in life than those who did neither of those three things.

Humans have the ability to make unique decisions other mammals are incapable of doing. We can speak, create things with perfected measurements yet we destroy are uniqueness by drinking things that slip through the blood brain barrier so easily and cause chaos and instability in the brain. Light alcohol is ok. Too much is not ok.

This is one of the things that piss me off about nurses is that they don't remember their foundation. If they remembered what they learned in their pre-reqs, they'd probably have less to worry about such as patient ignorance and personal problems.

The science behind your decisions is there. If you do drugs or drink alcohol beyond reasonable amounts, you're ruining your life. It's not good stuff to do. I don't drink alcohol for many reasons: 1. My dad drinks or used to drink and it made him become an ******* in ways you'd want to call CPS. 2. It causes organ damage and brain damage. 3. It can kill people such as drunk driving. 4. I don't want to be like my dad. Someone who has no self-control and decision making.

I initially wrote a lengthy, scientific post, explaining how the blood-brain barrier alone has very little to do with substance abuse and how, unfortunately, rudimentary A&P can't save us all.

I wrote about cerebral neurodiversity, how addictive substances work in the midbrain, nucleus accumbens, and the prefrontal cortex; the concepts of neurotransmition and neuroplasticity, the roles of dopamine and the subsequent cortico-striatal glutamate release in the brain and what that means for us; CRF's role, and how this all influences the creation of addiction and even substance cravings, etc., yada yada, yada. All to try to explain why your theory won't hold water.

Then I deleted it all because I knew I was wasting my breath. Instead, I'll leave you with this simpler analogy:

A&P also tells us that too many calories over our BMR requirement can make the human body obese...and being obese can have super nasty health consequences. Duh! Don't need to be a nurse to know that, even.

I mean, since A&P educated us so well, who would ever regularly eat way over their BMR if they were truly reflecting on the possibility of getting obesity-related diabetes, osteoarthristis, CAD, HTN, hypermipidemia, OSA, stroke, DVTs, generalized inflammation, infertility, pregnancy complications, and gall bladder and fatty liver disease? Horrible consequences everywhere! It's so simple, right? Just eat healthy and in moderation!!

Hmm...wrong. Somehow, that doesnt doesn't stop some doctors and nurses (myself included) from scarfing too many refined carbs and Kit Kats at the nurses station on the regular either. Or from buying tons of processed food and eschewing veggies and fruit while never exercising up a solid sweat. Why are we doing this?? We know better because we are educated by A&P!

Oh so very, very wrong.

Because the science behind obesity is WAY more complicated than such a simplification like I made! What makes you obese won't necessarily make me obese! I crave food differently than you crave food. You may eat a single cupcake and be happy. I may eat one and spent 20 minutes fighting a nasty craving for 2 more. And then lose that craving and eat 1,500 calories of delicious, chocolatey cupcake in under 15 minutes. But I knew better! Ugh, why??

Because it's INDIVIDUALIZED. We all react to food uniquely. Same with substances!!!

So how will pontificating on the blood brain barrier save us all from addiction?

Answer: it won't. At all. It's a gross oversimplification of a massively complex process that leads to the DISEASE of addiction. Countless things cross the blood brain barrier...sugar included (as glucose). So what? It's what happens after it hits the brain that matters; not the fact that the substance merely hits the brain.

Hmm...well, my post still turned out long. Can't say I'm sorry.

Eris Discordia, BSN, RN (getting my MS to be a LSATP...Licensed Substance Abuse Treatment Practitioner)

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