i am a new grad rn who started work recently. i was going ok at first, i really enjoyed it, and felt a sense of accomplishment that i was making a difference to peoples lives. but recently it all seems to be falling apart, i feel that i am going backwards and getting more incompetent by the day. there are moments where i feel totally utterly and completely lost and i really just don't know where to begin....and once the panic sets in, i fall to pieces.......after that it is all i can do just to make it to the end of the shift. i really don't care about what i'm doing, i just want it to be over.....i start with one pt, and eventually find something i don't know how to do, one of the meds, a dressing, or whatever, so i just leave that pt for the moment and move on to something i can do for the next person, until of course the same situation arises in the next person, and i just move on the next and so on..... eventually the only things i have left to do in my shift are things i don't know how to do, and i panic, and the shift gets worse and worse and worse as i go.
i'm not usually a tearful person, but would find myself in tears during each shift, even over the slightest things. it was an awful week this week, i couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, i was just so stressed and i hated it....there were so many times during the shift where i just feel like walking out the door and never coming back.. the worst bit is i get so focused on the "things" i have to do, i almost forget about my "patients." the only way i make it to the end of the shift is by telling myself that i will resign tomorrow and never have to come back here.
i have called in sick 3 times in 3 weeks (once i didn't even call, just didn't show up) because i just couldn't bring myself to go to work. i feel so sorry for my patients. i really don't know what i'm doing. they ask me questions and i haven't got a clue how to answer. and when i get home i start to remember all the little things i forgot to do, or should have done.....all the other new grads are doing so well, and there really are no excuses anymore for my inability to be a good nurse.
the other staff are so nice to me, and this stresses me out even more. even when i do stupid things they just tell me its ok. but its not ok!! i should know better. they think i am a good nurse (or so they told me)....and really i am not! i am terrified they will find this out eventually...i know it shouldn't matter so much what others think, but it really does......they have such high expectations of me, and have spent so much of their time trying to help me, and i don't want to disappoint them. they all help me so much. they help too much, i should be able to do things on my own, but don't seem to be able to get through the shift without an enormous amount of help from the other nurses. i even had a student rn working with me this week who was 10 times better at the job than i was. i couldn't have got through the shift without her help. this is very wrong as i was supposed to be the one teaching and helping her, not the other way around. i really don't know how i even still have a job. people keep saying that i'm a good nurse, that i just need more confidence, etc.......i don't understand how they can say this after they see how hopeless i am and all the stupid things i do??????? i really have started to hate the job, or at least i hate that i am no good at it.
i wish i could go back to my old job as a nurses aide. at least i knew what i was doing and i enjoyed it, and at least i felt i was giving competent care to my patients. people told me all along i'd never make a good rn and i really should have listened. i suppose i just didn't want to face the fact that i really am not cut out for nursing, and i still don't want to face it or else i would just resign and get it over with. you probably cant tell from this post, but i really do love nursing. i really don't want to give up, is there anything i can do? any hope i will get better at this job? or should i quit while i'm ahead?
We all go through something like this every day. Although I am an experienced nurse, I'm relatively new at my job as a nursing instructor so in a sense I'm a new grad all over again. I would find a mentor or your preceptor and talk about your needs, because at the rate you're going you're going to either quit or be fired (over absenteeism and no call/no show, NOT for incompetence!!). You need a lot of support and I hope you're in a situation to get it.
Good advice! Have you thought about maybe applying to medical school?
there are times i feel i want to quite too. in fact my first experence in the hospital was so bad that ive avoided it ever since. that was over a year ago. im fairly a new grad of one year. i do home health and hospice cause that is less frightening. i dont know why we feel this way. other nurses feel the same as we do. for them they agency nursing to avoid the commentment. for me it was different cause the nurses didnt help me. i was told by some i was doing a great job, but never by the boss. i was not given support, alot of gossip took place . i wasnt part of it and so i was excluded. i have my b.a.degree and im staying in school to get my master's to teach. i dont think i want to nurse. i stay cause i cant make better wait now.
shalom
hi everyone,
i am a new grad rn who started work recently. i was going ok at first, i really enjoyed it, and felt a sense of accomplishment that i was making a difference to peoples lives. but recently it all seems to be falling apart, i feel that i am going backwards and getting more incompetent by the day. there are moments where i feel totally utterly and completely lost and i really just don't know where to begin....and once the panic sets in, i fall to pieces.......after that it is all i can do just to make it to the end of the shift. i really don't care about what i'm doing, i just want it to be over.....i start with one pt, and eventually find something i don't know how to do, one of the meds, a dressing, or whatever, so i just leave that pt for the moment and move on to something i can do for the next person, until of course the same situation arises in the next person, and i just move on the next and so on..... eventually the only things i have left to do in my shift are things i don't know how to do, and i panic, and the shift gets worse and worse and worse as i go.
i'm not usually a tearful person, but would find myself in tears during each shift, even over the slightest things. it was an awful week this week, i couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, i was just so stressed and i hated it....there were so many times during the shift where i just feel like walking out the door and never coming back.. the worst bit is i get so focused on the "things" i have to do, i almost forget about my "patients." the only way i make it to the end of the shift is by telling myself that i will resign tomorrow and never have to come back here.
i have called in sick 3 times in 3 weeks (once i didn't even call, just didn't show up) because i just couldn't bring myself to go to work. i feel so sorry for my patients. i really don't know what i'm doing. they ask me questions and i haven't got a clue how to answer. and when i get home i start to remember all the little things i forgot to do, or should have done.....all the other new grads are doing so well, and there really are no excuses anymore for my inability to be a good nurse.
the other staff are so nice to me, and this stresses me out even more. even when i do stupid things they just tell me its ok. but its not ok!! i should know better. they think i am a good nurse (or so they told me)....and really i am not! i am terrified they will find this out eventually...i know it shouldn't matter so much what others think, but it really does......they have such high expectations of me, and have spent so much of their time trying to help me, and i don't want to disappoint them. they all help me so much. they help too much, i should be able to do things on my own, but don't seem to be able to get through the shift without an enormous amount of help from the other nurses. i even had a student rn working with me this week who was 10 times better at the job than i was. i couldn't have got through the shift without her help. this is very wrong as i was supposed to be the one teaching and helping her, not the other way around. i really don't know how i even still have a job. people keep saying that i'm a good nurse, that i just need more confidence, etc.......i don't understand how they can say this after they see how hopeless i am and all the stupid things i do??????? i really have started to hate the job, or at least i hate that i am no good at it.
i wish i could go back to my old job as a nurses aide. at least i knew what i was doing and i enjoyed it, and at least i felt i was giving competent care to my patients. people told me all along i'd never make a good rn and i really should have listened. i suppose i just didn't want to face the fact that i really am not cut out for nursing, and i still don't want to face it or else i would just resign and get it over with. you probably cant tell from this post, but i really do love nursing. i really don't want to give up, is there anything i can do? any hope i will get better at this job? or should i quit while i'm ahead?
I am also a new grad, June this year. I worked in the same hospital I am at now as an LPN for 2 years, so making the transition has been a little easier,(note easier not easy!!) as I am already familar with the staff and the routine. I also have a great group of co-workers that are always ready to lend a hand or answer a question when I have one, (which is frequently). But there are the incredibly overwhelming shifts, but you have to realize you are not supernurse, take a deep breath and just do the best that you can, and do not be afraid to ask for help when you need it. Good luck to you!
hi new grad! please don't give up on yourself. first thing you need to do is quit looking around at what everyone else can do/knows about/etc. keep your focus on yourself and understand there is a lot you don't know. nursing school only takes you so far, the rest is on the job (or i prefer to say combat!) training. i have been a nurse since 96 and am currently trying to get back in the hospital, been in home care/administration since 99. having a hard time trying to get back in, you're already in so now is where you have to let yourself relax, go into work understanding you are going to learn some new things today. understand that there are experienced nurses who know those things that you don't and they are there to guide and teach, to pick up where nursing school leaves off. i believe you haven't found your groove yet and now you may be too wound up to be able to find it. relax, pat yourself on the back for the things you do know and approach it the way you did in nursing school, learning new things, we, as nurses, learn new things every day and we learn it from each other. and quit being so hard on yourself!
hi everyone,
i am a new grad rn who started work recently. i was going ok at first, i really enjoyed it, and felt a sense of accomplishment that i was making a difference to peoples lives. but recently it all seems to be falling apart, i feel that i am going backwards and getting more incompetent by the day. there are moments where i feel totally utterly and completely lost and i really just don't know where to begin....and once the panic sets in, i fall to pieces.......after that it is all i can do just to make it to the end of the shift. i really don't care about what i'm doing, i just want it to be over.....i start with one pt, and eventually find something i don't know how to do, one of the meds, a dressing, or whatever, so i just leave that pt for the moment and move on to something i can do for the next person, until of course the same situation arises in the next person, and i just move on the next and so on..... eventually the only things i have left to do in my shift are things i don't know how to do, and i panic, and the shift gets worse and worse and worse as i go.
i'm not usually a tearful person, but would find myself in tears during each shift, even over the slightest things. it was an awful week this week, i couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, i was just so stressed and i hated it....there were so many times during the shift where i just feel like walking out the door and never coming back.. the worst bit is i get so focused on the "things" i have to do, i almost forget about my "patients." the only way i make it to the end of the shift is by telling myself that i will resign tomorrow and never have to come back here.
i have called in sick 3 times in 3 weeks (once i didn't even call, just didn't show up) because i just couldn't bring myself to go to work. i feel so sorry for my patients. i really don't know what i'm doing. they ask me questions and i haven't got a clue how to answer. and when i get home i start to remember all the little things i forgot to do, or should have done.....all the other new grads are doing so well, and there really are no excuses anymore for my inability to be a good nurse.
the other staff are so nice to me, and this stresses me out even more. even when i do stupid things they just tell me its ok. but its not ok!! i should know better. they think i am a good nurse (or so they told me)....and really i am not! i am terrified they will find this out eventually...i know it shouldn't matter so much what others think, but it really does......they have such high expectations of me, and have spent so much of their time trying to help me, and i don't want to disappoint them. they all help me so much. they help too much, i should be able to do things on my own, but don't seem to be able to get through the shift without an enormous amount of help from the other nurses. i even had a student rn working with me this week who was 10 times better at the job than i was. i couldn't have got through the shift without her help. this is very wrong as i was supposed to be the one teaching and helping her, not the other way around. i really don't know how i even still have a job. people keep saying that i'm a good nurse, that i just need more confidence, etc.......i don't understand how they can say this after they see how hopeless i am and all the stupid things i do??????? i really have started to hate the job, or at least i hate that i am no good at it.
i wish i could go back to my old job as a nurses aide. at least i knew what i was doing and i enjoyed it, and at least i felt i was giving competent care to my patients. people told me all along i'd never make a good rn and i really should have listened. i suppose i just didn't want to face the fact that i really am not cut out for nursing, and i still don't want to face it or else i would just resign and get it over with. you probably cant tell from this post, but i really do love nursing. i really don't want to give up, is there anything i can do? any hope i will get better at this job? or should i quit while i'm ahead?
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
never, never, ever give up! If this job is a poor fit, look for other opportunities. Hang in there and be good to yourself. You are all you have. Best wishes!
i have been a nurse since 96 and am currently trying to get back in the hospital, been in home care/administration since 99. having a hard time trying to get back in,
hi can you tell us what difficulties are involved in getting hospital work? thanks
Until you get over your self hatred you will not do well. You are your own worst enemy and because of it a selfulfilling prophecy. Does your employer offer an employee assistance program with pyscological counseling serviecs? If so run don't walk there. Otherwise you would do well to use your health insurance benefit to seek counseling.
This is NOT something that you will overcome over night nor without tough counseling.
It has nothing to do with any real or imagined lack of ability it has to do with your thought processes and until you do something it will continue to hold you back and ever destroy you.
thanks so much angie o'plasty for your very encouraging words to us new grads!!!
i precept new grads on a daily basis, in addition to remembering the new nurse experience all too well.
i want you to try approaching this job as a learning experience. not "i'm bad" or "i'm good," but "i'm learning." please stop critiquing your work; that's your preceptor's job. if you're hearing that you're doing ok, go out on a limb
this is why you must stop beating yourself up for not knowing it all. you can't. none of us can.....
your stumbling block is that you think you can know it all--or at least a really large part of it--and it's much too soon for you as a new grad to be able to handle yourself without help.....
please understand two things:
1.it's ok to ask for help--experienced nurses do it all the time.
2. it's ok that you do not know everything right away.
different students come from different levels of education, training, and experience. please don't compare yourself to them. you know some things that they don't, they know some things that you don't. this is why nurses collaborate with each other, both in real life on the job, and here.
what i'm really getting at is this concept:
focus on improvement, not on judgment.
because if truth be told, we all sucked as new nurses.
focus on getting your inner voice involved in more positive self-talk. say something like, "i will be successful at this. they want me to succeed."
because we--your nurse coworkers and colleagues--really do!
pm me if you need to talk more, and please keep us updated.
from what i have gathered from this post you are having trouble eating, trouble sleeping, feeling sad and alone, and having a lot of feelings or worthlessness and guilt, and no longer taking pleasure in daily activities. these are all symptoms of depression. starting a new job (especially one in nursing) can be very stressful and from the other responses i've read many people seemed to feel frustrated when they first started and this may be a simple case of stress related blues or it may be more than that. either one is a completely normal reaction to such a big change in your life. i am not a psychologist in no way qualified to diagnose anyone with anything but if these feelings persist (or have persisted) for more than 2 weeks i suggest you talk to a counselor. i hope things are going better.
hi everyone,
i am a new grad rn who started work recently. i was going ok at first, i really enjoyed it, and felt a sense of accomplishment that i was making a difference to peoples lives. but recently it all seems to be falling apart, i feel that i am going backwards and getting more incompetent by the day. there are moments where i feel totally utterly and completely lost and i really just don't know where to begin....and once the panic sets in, i fall to pieces.......after that it is all i can do just to make it to the end of the shift. i really don't care about what i'm doing, i just want it to be over.....i start with one pt, and eventually find something i don't know how to do, one of the meds, a dressing, or whatever, so i just leave that pt for the moment and move on to something i can do for the next person, until of course the same situation arises in the next person, and i just move on the next and so on..... eventually the only things i have left to do in my shift are things i don't know how to do, and i panic, and the shift gets worse and worse and worse as i go.
i'm not usually a tearful person, but would find myself in tears during each shift, even over the slightest things. it was an awful week this week, i couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, i was just so stressed and i hated it....there were so many times during the shift where i just feel like walking out the door and never coming back.. the worst bit is i get so focused on the "things" i have to do, i almost forget about my "patients." the only way i make it to the end of the shift is by telling myself that i will resign tomorrow and never have to come back here.
i have called in sick 3 times in 3 weeks (once i didn't even call, just didn't show up) because i just couldn't bring myself to go to work. i feel so sorry for my patients. i really don't know what i'm doing. they ask me questions and i haven't got a clue how to answer. and when i get home i start to remember all the little things i forgot to do, or should have done.....all the other new grads are doing so well, and there really are no excuses anymore for my inability to be a good nurse.
the other staff are so nice to me, and this stresses me out even more. even when i do stupid things they just tell me its ok. but its not ok!! i should know better. they think i am a good nurse (or so they told me)....and really i am not! i am terrified they will find this out eventually...i know it shouldn't matter so much what others think, but it really does......they have such high expectations of me, and have spent so much of their time trying to help me, and i don't want to disappoint them. they all help me so much. they help too much, i should be able to do things on my own, but don't seem to be able to get through the shift without an enormous amount of help from the other nurses. i even had a student rn working with me this week who was 10 times better at the job than i was. i couldn't have got through the shift without her help. this is very wrong as i was supposed to be the one teaching and helping her, not the other way around. i really don't know how i even still have a job. people keep saying that i'm a good nurse, that i just need more confidence, etc.......i don't understand how they can say this after they see how hopeless i am and all the stupid things i do??????? i really have started to hate the job, or at least i hate that i am no good at it.
i wish i could go back to my old job as a nurses aide. at least i knew what i was doing and i enjoyed it, and at least i felt i was giving competent care to my patients. people told me all along i'd never make a good rn and i really should have listened. i suppose i just didn't want to face the fact that i really am not cut out for nursing, and i still don't want to face it or else i would just resign and get it over with. you probably cant tell from this post, but i really do love nursing. i really don't want to give up, is there anything i can do? any hope i will get better at this job? or should i quit while i'm ahead?
(which is frequently). But there are the incredibly overwhelming shifts, but you have to realize you are not supernurse, take a deep breath and just do the best that you can, and do not be afraid to ask for help when you need it. Good luck to you! 
.thumb.jpg.6eeb2c01c27cfd151d706238b7f6d6b7.jpg){kind=small}
Greg06
8 Posts