Need a backbone...

[boulergirl, CNA]

Hello everyone,

There's a CNA on day shift I absolutely cannot stand. She makes everyone, including the boss, feel that they're not doing their job. Yesterday morning, I went to the dementia unit to ask her where my co-worker was (I needed to relay a message to her). As soon as I asked her, she just gave me a blank stare as she walked past me. I asked again to see if she heard me. She practically snapped my head off. "Calm yourself down, WOMAN!! You can go look for her yourself. I'm sure you'll find her if you look in the rooms." I did find her, but that woman's sharp tongue and flippant attitude just unnerved me. She is also mean to the other ladies on my shift (11-7). Another person on day shift told me that the boss has already talked to that CNA about her tone of voice. I need to get some assertiveness training or something. I'm getting tired of this woman's rude, condescending treatment of me and my co-workers. :angryfire

[kidluvinRN]

Aren't there always people like this?!? :imbar They aim to intimidate and do it well. While she could have politely answered your question and suggested you look yourself; she ignored and then snapped. Remind yourself, her attitude is her problem not yours. The hard part is not reacting to her negative message and getting intimidated or angry. If someone ignores me I usually say, Perhaps you didn't hear me. . .and try again. Good luck!

[MandyInMS]

I'm sorry someone pissed in your Froot Loops this morning, but where is Ms Jones? ~evil grinz~

[Jo Dirt]

It sounds like we had one where I work who was worse than the one you're describing. She got pissy with the wrong nurse one night and ended up fired.

Is she new? I can't imagine she will last very long at that rate. Even as desperate as some nursing homes are (I assume it is a nursing home) they usually won't put up with too much sass.

[Farkinott, RN]

Play smart. Burn her.

[boulergirl, CNA]

She's been there for about a year (it's an assisted-living home). Oh, and last month she got "Employee of the Month". Oooooooooooo.........:angryfire

Sorry...I know I shouldn't get upset. It's just that I've been there for four years and the boss says I'm doing a good job. Ok......

I was going to move to day shift, but her attitude sticks in my craw, so I might just find a daytime position--somewhere else! In the meantime, this woman will be a good guinea pig for my assertiveness training. Who knows, maybe she won't last long. We had one day shift CNA who had a "know-it-all" bossy attitude and lorded it over me--until she got fired for stealing. The boss caught it all on videotape from the parking lot one night.

[cannoli]

She's been there for about a year (it's an assisted-living home). Oh, and last month she got "Employee of the Month". Oooooooooooo.........:angryfire

Sorry...I know I shouldn't get upset. It's just that I've been there for four years and the boss says I'm doing a good job. Ok......

I was going to move to day shift, but her attitude sticks in my craw, so I might just find a daytime position--somewhere else! In the meantime, this woman will be a good guinea pig for my assertiveness training. Who knows, maybe she won't last long. We had one day shift CNA who had a "know-it-all" bossy attitude and lorded it over me--until she got fired for stealing. The boss caught it all on videotape from the parking lot one night.

Don't they always get "Employee of the Month"? Gotta love it! Sadly, many times they, and many nurses are the same way, will be the ones staying and retiring from the place, while others get run off by their behavior. They don't care, they are getting their paycheck every two weeks, while making it too unbearable for others to stay there and work.

Good luck with your job hunt, I think I would do the same thing.

[boulergirl, CNA]

cannoli, everybody's been telling me to leave that place for four years!! :rotfl:

Anybody have some tips for standing up to someone? When I was growing up I had to deal with bullies. My parents always told me to "ignore them" "pray for them", ask God to help me with the bullying (endure it) because there was nothing I could do. Teachers could care less. So basically I was never taught how to stand up to my bullies. I don't mean anything physical, just learning how to show them that you won't take their crap!!

[SmilingBluEyes]

Check this site out regarding dealing with bullies (they come in all ages and sizes):

http://www.bullyonline.org/

I hope it helps. Talks about how to deal with them and points you to some books/resources out there to teach you what you can do when people bully you. Good luck to you!

[mariedoreen]

Try a book called Verbal Judo.. it's a skill that is taught to law enforcement officers that will help you stay calm in the midst of nastiness, help you verbally deflect their barbs, and help YOU be the one that maintains verbal control in the encounter.

[RedSox33RN]

I've dealt with that type before. I just smile sweetly, and ask what I did to pi$$ them off? And have a look of wonder on my face - not sneering or anything. After the person says whatever they're going to say, just say, "A lot of people feel you are very angry. If so, I hope you can find a way to get over it soon, because you make many people angry with you."

Or something to that effect.

How irritating having to deal with that BS. And even the BOSS puts up with it? I'd say the boss has no backbone.

[tmiller027]

One thing I do, and its harder for me since I am a CNA and we have some flippant nurses, who can write me up if they feel I'm insubordinate, even though they might be the ones completely out of line. One nurse started shouting at me over something stupid one day, and I just looked at her calmly and asked: "Why are you screaming? I'll take care of it." She was pretty taken back by it and didn't say anything to me the rest of the night. I actually think it scared her. People like that tend to freak out when they see they're not getting to you.