Need a backbone...

jgillyrn · Aug 29, 2004

First off I'm a supervisor in a nursing home ane noone should be screaming at you including nurses. It's harder than you think to get rid of bad employees. People start to give up and not write them up. What I tell my staff is continue to write them up because we do track it and as soon as we can legally fire them we will and we do. If you like your job and don't want to leave talk to your boss and don't let the nasty's get you down!

SmilingBluEyes · Aug 29, 2004

Paper trails are extremely helpful. Without documentation, it can be impossible to get rid of bad employees, be they aides, nurses or ancillary staff.

cabbage patch rn · Aug 30, 2004

I dealt with something similar with my last job, one of the reasons I finally got fed up and left. The thorn in my side was another RN, and everyone put up with her crap, of course she kissed our manager's orifice, but even the manager recognized how she treated people and did absolutely nothing about it. I was new in the specialty that I was working although I was in no way a new nurse, had been a nurse longer than her actually. Instead of her trying to help me learn, she nit-picked everything I did, criticized me and my nursing care constantly, and talked about me behind my back to my co-workers. I felt so undermined and began to hate going into work, even though I loved the actual job. I did stand up to her once when she bashed me in front or my co-workers and she stopped harassing me for a few days, I thought it was over. Then it started all over again when she started going to my manager complaining about me once again. It wouldn't have bothered me as much if I didn't believe with every fiber of my being that I am an excellent nurse, I care about my patients, and I do everything possible to take care of them. Granted there were things I did not know, as I said, I was still learning. But she didn't make it easy at all. I thought when I went to a night position that things would calm down a little, when I no longer had to work with her. Instead, I think it became even worse. During report when I would speak, she would roll her eyes up, dart glances at other nurses, and even whisper. I even overheard her talking about me one morning after she thought I had already left. That was the final straw for me. Sometimes you have to get out of a bad situation while you still have your sanity left. This situation hurt me so deeply that I almost had an emotional breakdown. I became so depressed and irritable with the ones I love, and at work I was paranoid and constantly feeling a high level of stress. I found another job in the same specialty area and I am loving it. And guess what? I have the respect of all of my co-workers and my manager begs me everyday to come work full-time even though I can't because of family obligations. One of the doctors that practices at the hospital told me the other day how glad he was that I was working there and that it was so good to have a competent nursing help. He even asks my opinion in many situations. In a way, I'm glad all of that happened. If I hadn't gone through it, I wouldn't have found my job that I have now, and I probably wouldn't appreciate it half as much. I hope you find peace in your current situation, but remember if you don't, it's not the only job out there and there just might be something better waiting for you! :)

RN NYSDOCS · Aug 30, 2004

You tolerate that? Where I work I would have sent her out, without pay. That kind of thing is never tolerated. If you are an RN or LPN you are her supervisor. You need to deal with it or report it to your supervisor.

mscsrjhm · Aug 30, 2004

Play smart. Burn her.

Farkinott is correct. Offensive maneuvers.

laughing weasel · Aug 30, 2004

Laugh at a bully it destroys them and their power so they will fear you. Seriously laughter at their expense is the most dangerous weapon that you have if and only if you can take a little laughter in return.

laughing weasel · Aug 30, 2004

Tell your human resources why you are leaving before you leave. If she causes enough trouble with staffing, she will be the one looking for work. Bullies enrage me like no other force in the world.

boulergirl, CNA · Sep 1, 2004

Thanks for all your responses everyone! I've been offline for awhile.

So far this week, I've managed to avoid confrontation with this person because we say as little as possible to each other and keep our distances. But if we do have a "showdown", I'll just have to consult "Verbal Judo" (or act like I'm going mad...) :devil:

I have to keep reminding myself that I've been at that facility much longer than she has, and I don't work under her. Since I'm not HER supervisor, I can't fire her--POOEY!! (We're shift supervisors, but on different shifts.)

As far as bully nurses go, my old boss was one. She would cut people's hours if they went over her head or did other things she didn't like. More than once I heard reports of someone holding the phone away from their ear while the boss cussed them out. :eek: She didn't last long. We also had a girl on night shift who was straight from the Bronx, and was extremely loud and intimidating. I had to stand up to her one night, but not without someone else there for backup. She didn't last long, either--too many complaints from the staff. So I'm hoping that this broad will either warm up to me, learn to get along with me, or one of us leaves. Probably me--she can retire there for all I care...

Anyway, I will definitely keep everyone's advice in mind in case she or anyone else decides they can walk all over me. Bullies enrage me, too.

purplemania, BSN, RN · Sep 1, 2004

Our facility is making an effort to get rid of people like that because they run off GOOD employees. I think it is about time!

boulergirl, CNA · Sep 3, 2004

You know, when I first started my job four years ago, I was on day shift (7-3). I NEVER intended to work the night shift. I wasn't performing fast enough or well enough for day shift, so their complaints got me placed on the night shift after two weeks on the job. Management placed me on nights for two weeks, but 3-11 did not appeal to me, and I wasn't about to rejoin the backstabbers on 7-3. So I'm still working nights.

The ladies on day shift who tried to get rid of me managed to run off a LOT of good employees--either to another shift or to another job! They ruled the roost, until a new exec. director came in. They had him wrapped around their lil finger 'til he cut their overtime. They hollered about it and he blew them off, so they quit. It worked itself out. I would like to see management take a stand against employees like this, though, and not mollycoddle them and be their buddies.

jannecdote · Sep 3, 2004

When I started my current job, I had several years of med/surg under my belt and was confident in my nursing skills. That was a plus for me, because there was a group of nurses who were always nit-picking, watching me to see how long I was off the unit(I could see them watching me from the window while I was on break), being aggressive towards me, etc. and reporting things to the supervisor about me. I always wondered...how could they be doing their job if they were so busy watching me do mine........I guess if I weren't so laid back I might have blown a gasket, but I stayed calm and one by one these same nurses were fired for incompetence during my first year. Even the supervisor got fired. The only thing I did was my job and did not let myself get sucked into their negativity. :rolleyes:

jeepgirl, LPN, NP · Sep 3, 2004

I had something similar happen to me. all i have to say is that you have to be very assertive. She won't continue to treat you this way if you insist on addressing it.