Published Jul 24, 2008
acaringhusband
4 Posts
Hello,
My wife has completed her first year of nursing school and did a GREAT job (near all A's) even though she constantly dreaded every test and quiz and questioned herself being there. She definitely underestimates her ability :)
The first year was tough but I wanted to give her good time to study and be there for her to take care of the kids and just give her what she needed to do well. The next (her final) year is coming up in about one month and she's absolutely dreading going back!! I can see it in her eyes all the time. I think it's just all the work and being away from the family and feeling tired and well, you all know what I mean I know she wants to do it for the family, and it's always been her dream to be a nurse since we've been married (11 years).
I really really want to encourage her and show her that we support her - help her feel good about going back. But, I'm just not sure how to do that. All of the encouraging words I know do help, but I guess I'm looking for that extra special something....... Any ideas, thoughts, etc most welcome :) Thank you
NursingAgainstdaOdds
450 Posts
Holy. Sweetness. Batman. You really are "acaringhusband". :)
FWIW, I dreaded the return to school after every break as well. It was difficult! I really think the key thing is to just "keep your eyes on the prize", and remind your wifey to do so. She might know what she needs to do in that, and other, regards, but still - hearing it from you is helpful.
Is she already on AllNurses? I found this site immensely helpful as a student nurse and new grad (and now too!).
psalm, RN
1,263 Posts
Yes, I felt the same way after every break and vacation. I think it is performance anxiety, plus all the expectations the instructors have...and the animosity at clinicals from many (not all) floor nurses and aides. I really appreciated my younger son's feelings towards school WHEN I was a nursing student. By then he was in college and the stress was gone for him, lol!
luvschoolnursing, LPN
651 Posts
I went back to school for my BSN a few years ago and while it wasn't hard like nursing school, it still was time consuming and difficult to manage everything. My husband was GREAT. My best advice is just be supportive and remind her why she is doing this and how great it will be for her when she is done. Make sure the kids know that when mom is doing homework, they need to come to you, not her.
By the way, I thought it was a good example for my kids that even if you are "old" you can still go back and reach your dreams-which in my case was getting OUT of the hospital.:nuke:
Thanks for being acaringhusband!
Hands and Heart
217 Posts
Definitely direct her to this site if she isn't already here. This is a great place to find information, share experiences, or just to vent. People here are either going through the same thing and can commiserate or have been through it and can offer advice. Continue to be supportive and do your part to ease the stress that nursing school creates.
rnmomtobe2010
1,051 Posts
Just keep encouraging her and stick by her. Hopefully she will come around. Good luck...
CHATSDALE
4,177 Posts
nursing school is dificult because you are trying to absorb knowledge that is different from anything that you are use to and the instructors can put a lot stress on you esp if you show any signs of blinking
tell her it will be worth it in the end and that you are thre for her so she has a place to retreat
4jen
92 Posts
You are an awesome husband which is probably all the support she needs. I am wrapping up an awful and I do mean awful summer session and in 4 wks I am starting my senior semester. My husband has been amazing, our children are very young so it has been alot of work on him. He tells me all the positive things I bet you tell your wife and that is all you can do. Just continue to be compassionate and supportive it makes all the difference in the world.
pagandeva2000, LPN
7,984 Posts
Refer her here if she hasn't discovered this gold mine already. But, in the meantime, remind her of her goals, and that this is what she has to go through in order to finally become the nurse she craved to be. It will go quickly. I can say from my experience in nursing school that I can totally understand what she is going through.
Bortaz, MSN, RN
2,628 Posts
I woke up today and realized I have just about a month before I go back to school, and suddenly started dreading it myself.
I thought I was ready to go, because I'm looking forward to our peds/ob rotations. I've even been reading and pre-studying a good bit, in anticipation.
Now, though, it's all "Oh, s&%*, my summer is nearly over!"
RN1989
1,348 Posts
Sounds like she needs to work through why she is dreading going back to school. Time away from family when you are a nurse is a given. Nurses spend more holidays with their coworkers than their familys. Nurses miss recitals, ball games, plays, and sometimes even graduations. If this is the type of thing that she doesn't like about nursing school - that isn't going to get any better. She needs to decide what her true goals in life are before she gets "locked" into being a nurse and is unhappy.
janis9799
89 Posts
Last year I was dreading it myself...felt like I had early senioritis. We had to take psych over the summer so we didn't have much summer time off...three weeks I think. I kept telling myself that it was only nine more months...and take one month away for winter break. Also on my first day of school last fall I thought," This is my last first day of the school year." I would encourage her to do fun things now...try not to think about school right now. Maybe get her a nice relaxing day at the spa or at very least a massage and pedicure. I know that would make me feel better. It really goes pretty quick and if her program is anything like mine the second year is easier, you are organized, you know what the tests will be like, and you live happily in the thought at least you have one year down :) Also if she doesn't have it get her APA program for her papers, helps do the references and citing through the paper...I loved it. You can download it at perrla.com and it costs about $23. Best money I EVER spent.
Janis
Who gets tired just thinking aboutpeople going to nursing school now that I am out.