My husband has Cancer and not sure If I should go to school this fall.

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Hello everyone,

:cry: We just found out my 26 year old husband has cancer and I'm not so sure if I should go to school this fall. I never throught that at the age of 27 that I would be caring for my sick spouse. I have take AP 01, remedial Algebra math and work 25 hours a week. My goal is to apply to two BSN programs for the Fall 09. I still have to pass college algebra, most of my science courses, and lastly pass my entrance exams. If I can not get my gen ed class finish I might have to wait maybe another year. My mother-in-law wants to help but to she has just gotten through cancer herself. Mike (My husband) wants me to go to school but I am not so sure. My class starts on Aug 20 so I have to make up my mind.

Thanks

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I'm sorry to hear about your husband.

You know what your responsiblities and limitations. If you believe you can do it then I don't see why it should stop you. Your DH wants you to go so I think you should go.

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No one can tell you what to do. You have to do what feels right in your heart! If it was me, I would probably take the semester off or take online classes! I will keep your family in my prayers! :icon_hug: Hope everything works out ok!

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I am unsure of the kind of cancer your husband has as you don't say.....depending on what kind will also depend on his treatments. If he is supportive of you contining your education at this point, then I say do it....why? You will both need the small break from each each other. He will need lots of rest after a treatment and your classes will, although will not change anything, will help divert your mind. He will most likely at some point become a little depressed,....You will need to keep a clear head, so that you are not depressed along w/him, school will help w/that.

You can schedule most of his appointments around your classes and study while he sleeps, which he will. If your MIL wishes to help some, then let her....this will give her something to do and keep her from being depressed and help fill that Mom/Child void....this does not mean, let her take over your home.....it just means, let her help once in a while by cooking a meal,doing a load of laundry, sitting w/your DH while you attend a class.

Good Luck to you and keep us posted....maybe visit the Specialty section for Nurses and locate the nes who deal w/cancer and ask their opinion......You can do this and in the long run, Your "Husband" will be the first one there congratulating you.....You need to stand by each other and support each other.....that comes in many different forms.

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My prayers are with you and your husband.

God bless,

A

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Specializes in ICU.

Could you maybe take a class or two online? Then you could work on them whenever your schedule allows.

Whatever you decide, I will say a prayer for your husband.

take care,

Kim

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If it were me, I think I would take a very light course load (like one course), just so I kept my hand in it, and so that I still felt like I was proceeding toward my goal. It would all depend on:

(1) his prognosis;

(2) the treatments he might be scheduled for (surgery? chemo? radiation?) and whether I would have to take him to a lot of those treatments and doctor appointments;

(3) my mental state -- whether I felt I could handle dealing with his medical issues and school at the same time.

This is all very new and your brain is still processing the information. So take as much time as you are able to make any decisions. Our thoughts are with you and Mike! :icon_hug:

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I think CracklinRose gave you some really good advice. I just wanted to wish you and your husband luck and you're both in my prayers.

Kris

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Specializes in correctional.

There is such a huge difference between the different 'cancers' and 'treatments'. My husband worked a 40 hour/week job thru his chemo. Once you have more info, you can make reasonable decisions. I advise you both to find a support group, Gilda's Club is a great one. You will find others in the same boat, with practical advice & much kindness. The main thing is, you 2 are a balanced TEAM. Do not let anyone separate you, or discount you as merely the 'caregiver', or merely the 'family', as if only the patient counts. You both need each other more than ever. Please please keep in touch, with yourself, your husband, and us.

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I have no sage advice to add other than what has already been given but wanted to add my thoughts and prayers for your husband.

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I'm in this exact same boat as you. My husband was diagnosed with Testicular cancer in May. He is 28. I never thought at age 23 I could be a widow. I work FT 5 days a week and my class schedule will be M-T until October then it will be M-F. We have a 4 year old son. I decided to continue school (I took the summer semester off) for myself and because my hubby wanted me too.

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Specializes in ER, ICU, Medsurg.

My thoughts and prayers are with you as well. I strongly "ditto" cracklinrose's advice. Excellent, excellent advice.

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