I posted awhile back about my friend who graduated from nursing school (now over a year ago) & delayed getting a job because she had elective surgery.
She is very smart (3.9 GPA in a very competitive program) & this was her second bachelors degree. But because she delayed applying for jobs (she was offered a residency before she even passed her boards) now she is having a very difficult time landing an interview, let alone a job!
She is applying to hospitals in San Antonio & has only had 2 interviews. I've tried to tell her to expand her search outside of San Antonio to smaller towns, but she doesn't listen. I also suggested that she apply to Kindred, the VA & LTC. She always has a bunch of excuses not to. She says she will get a hospital job. But the fact that she is applying to jobs in a city saturated with new RNs doesn't look good for her.
I almost have given up caring. She did it to herself & I've tried to give her suggestions but she just doesn't listen/care. I've been an LVN for 4 years, she's been an unemployed RN for 1. She says she's starting to give up & would rather bag groceries or go back to school, again. For her third bachelors degree.
It just irritates me because she does NOTHING to help herself. She just wants to whine. She doesn't take refresher courses, so it just looks weird having a 1 year gap. She talks about how all of her classmates have jobs. I think to myself, well yeah...you would too if you took that residency & didn't turn it down because it wasn't the speciality you wanted or had surgery. Ugh!
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
Bet she's re-thinking that!
Yeah she is. Where I live there are a couple RN positions but she refuses to look outside of San Antonio. Nothing I can do to change her mind so I just have to let her drown.
A few things - your friend may really be clinically depressed and needs evaluation and medication.
She may really not want to be a nurse. Maybe didn't like it in school and regrets her education. So she's not pushing it.
She may enjoy all the sympathetic "oh, you poor thing".
She may really enjoy NOT having to work and just staying home.
Of all my reasons, I kind of like my first. Depression can immobilize and cause inertia. She's not in any position to heed advice from ANY source until she CHOOSES to. Your caring is NOT getting through to her - she's not ready. You can only stand by.
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
A few things - your friend may really be clinically depressed and needs evaluation and medication.
She may really not want to be a nurse. Maybe didn't like it in school and regrets her education. So she's not pushing it.
She may enjoy all the sympathetic "oh, you poor thing".
She may really enjoy NOT having to work and just staying home.
Of all my reasons, I kind of like my first. Depression can immobilize and cause inertia. She's not in any position to heed advice from ANY source until she CHOOSES to. Your caring is NOT getting through to her - she's not ready. You can only stand by.
That's all very true. That pretty much hits the nail on the head, although I never thought about her being depressed. But all of those reasons sound about right.
Specializes in Clinical Research, Outpt Women's Health.
Hard pill to swallow, but we all deal with that when we hit the working world. It is a humbling place!
It is like when you have a girlfriend who has a boyfriend who treats her like garbage. She spends endless hours crying to you about it, but is not willing to do anything to change the situation. After your soul gets sucked dry for a long long time you end up not wanting to even talk to the person. Eventually when a person refuses to help themselves you have to take a huge step back or you are actually enabling them and at your own expense. You feel terrible because you care about the person, but if they just will not do anything to help themselves what can you do?
OrganizedChaos, LVN
1 Article; 6,883 Posts
Yeah she is. Where I live there are a couple RN positions but she refuses to look outside of San Antonio. Nothing I can do to change her mind so I just have to let her drown.