Male Nurses, the reality of false allegations and the potential dooming effects

barcode120x, RN, NP · Oct 28, 2016

I don't think about it much, probably won't until or if it will ever happen. Anything invasive, especially regarding the opposite sex, I always explain to them exactly what I'm going to do and why and get their verbal (or written if needed consent). If the patient is not oriented, I would definitely get a co-worker and definitely one of the opposite sex to be my back up like your coworker or at least witness what I'm doing. The are reasons and orders why we do things to our patients so even if the patient claims something different, you have your training, your hospital, and your policies as back up and if you had a coworker there, even better. I honestly think this isn't something to be dreading over every time you do some invasive. But that's just me, I don't go around working constantly looking over my back.

A few months ago, I was in an overflow unit and received a very unhappy female, elderly patient with severe sundowners (I did not know at that time, unfortunately). Things got out of hand to the point where she was getting out of bed (she was to be on strict bedrest and her gait was very unsteady). She yelled things at me and told me not to touch her. At that point, I did not attempt to touch her or bring her back into the bed (she was standing with her cane at the doorway). I immediately called for help and female coworkers came to put her back in bed. She claimed that I had kidnapped her and took her home (of which all of us were just smiling). And of course, she had already pulled out her IV. I am not a fan of restraints and I felt that she did not need to be restrained (despite having an unsteady gait, she herself was not strong or fighting us). I attempted to reorient her but she already had it out for me. After the situation (which was on-going), I notified my charge nurse about what happened. I called the family of the patient and notified what had happened. They even spoke to the patient, who told them I had kidnapped her. Family was understanding and told me they would be there soon to be with her and help calm her down. Situation handled perfectly if I may say. I had plenty of charting typed up to cover myself. When I clocked out, I clocked out and went home to sleep and mind dumped. Didn't think about that situation until now haha.

OldDude · Oct 28, 2016

Absolutely. The potential is there every day. I narrowly avoided such a career ending disaster from a completely false allegation against me several years ago. That incident compelled me to change my professional insurance from a policy that defends me in cases of alleged negligence to a policy that covers legal fees for any circumstance wherein I need to defend myself from situations arising from work. Fortunately I haven't had to use it. Yes, nowadays you are guilty until you prove yourself innocent and sometimes a career is ruined even if you do prove your innocence.

zacarias, ASN, RN · Oct 30, 2016

I don't think about this possibility very often but you're right, it is something that could happen to any of us, at any time. My own policy is if I'm going to to put a Foley in a female pt, I will bring in a female to assist me or I will have another female nurse put in the Foley while I give all her meds or do some other intervention for her.

I've had a little old lady confused off her rocker thinking that a male CNA and me were trying to "do unnatural things" to her while we tried to get her back in bed but the door was wide open and other people were involved and there was no issue obviously.

The situation I would really think about is if it were a younger female ESPECIALLY with any type of psych issue such as BPD or Bipolar. Those are the ones that cause trouble. The point is we just need to be clear about our interventions and have witnesses as helpers for certain things that could be misinterpreted by a female or even male patient.

Z

Alex Egan, LPN, EMT-B · Oct 31, 2016

Well. It happened to me. I work in peds privet duty. When the mother of a non verbal toddler gets it in her head that her child may have been abused, it sets in motion protective apparatus that can't be stopped.

I was out of work for four months. Police investigation the whole deal. It was awful. My employer was genuinely not trying to put me under the bus but of course they had to.

The other nurses and cases noticed that I just disappeared, so I decided to get out infront of the rumor mill. Best decision I ever made, but now the cat is out of the bag, I can't pretend that the accusations didn't happen, everyone knows. Recent changes in the law here in PA means that I must disclose this to EVERY employer.

After all this. I went back. To privet duty overnights. Alone in a room with nonverbal children. It's the job I enjoy, and I'm not gonna let some crazy run me out of it. Being falsely accused is an occupational hazzard. My end of the business, its big and hard to mitigate. There is not a lot I can do about it. I listen to my gut and get out of cases that feel off or extra crazy. I prefer cases with cameras very strongly. In the end non of it matters though if someone makes an accusation in pediatrics the entire CPS mechanism slams into action and it has no regard for founded or not, crazy or sane.

My advice, do what you can do to mitigate risk within reason. If your gut tells you to be careful, listen. Accept that your risk can never be zero. You could get hit by a bus when you cross the street. We don't create bus free streets, or not cross the street at all. We accept that it could happen, but probably won't.

HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD · Nov 2, 2016

GAAAHHH! I HATE the idea that you are so vulnerable to these types of situations. As a manager, I have had a male staff member come into the crosshairs due to an accusation by confused/demented patient, so I "know the drill". But, I did not permit him to be suspended. I did insist on fair and equitable due process. He was completely exonerated without (I believe) any negative impact on his reputation.

This experience had a huge impact on my own awareness... afterward, I have always tried to be very sensitive of this risk & avoid assigning male staff to highly manipulative or loopy female patients who may be most likely to 'go there'.

I don't have any answers - just wanted to express my support. We love you guys. We've got your back.

Buyer beware, BSN · Nov 3, 2016

OP:

I can tell you without reservation that this has been a semi-conscious serious issue in hospital patient care for a long time. Traditionally the main targets of accusations/allegations have been male nurses and radiology technologists. This would figure. I have seen lives ruined over this and the irony of one case I clearly remember involved an elderly lady in some stage on the continuum of sun-downing (no kidding) late at night in this dingy ICU back in the 1990s. It involved a male nurse who was accused by the patient of molesting her during Foley care or something.

Let me tell you after the accusation this guy was devastated. He got depressed over it and left the unit. I never saw him again. Years later a friend of mine who was the charge nurse in the unit at the time told me that shortly after the incident he confided in her and told her that he himself felt violated first because he would never even consider doing such a thing and second because he was gay. Now I understand that this kind of thing has more to do with exploitation than sexuality but I still can't articulate the ignominy this guy felt and I believe a sense of betrayal.

So if every story has a moral, male nurses now more than ever for some reason must do every kind of intimate care with a chaperone. The problem there is that this puts a strain on the women and the working short staff in general. But what can you do.

In the U.S. at least, and I've read that in Canada it might be different, the ER docs always requested a chaperone for an OB/GYN exam. This seemed reasonable back then because of the litigious nature of things and doctors through experience are wary of being put in a compromised position by a mischief maker for obvious reasons.

But friends you have to have lived through the history of the OP's concerns to know that what seems so obvious today was not considered such a big deal or threat then. People we aware of the danger but there were no specific policies or warnings promulgated. For nurses it was more like an informal CYA.

So 10,000 patients later you let your guard down then bingo you"re on the cover of the pervert express daily.

I have to say that this situation today along with it's increased precautions gives me the feeling that when it comes to patient care it's one step forward and two necessary protect your behind steps backward.

How far we've come, he said sarcastically. Or was it always this way, he asked rhetorically.

JWG223 · Nov 6, 2016

If it happens it happens. Sue the offending party for lost wages, slander and libel, defamation of character, and so forth, and move on. Nursing is all about risk, and you can't cover yourself 100% for 100% of it. Just roll with it and know there are other jobs if the worst happens.

applewhitern, BSN, RN · Nov 6, 2016

In my career, I have known of 2 males who were terminated due to accusations of sexual misconduct. Both of them were nursing assistants. Nobody cared whether the accusations were true or not; they were fired to keep the families happy. I have worked with one male nurse (in Pediatric Critical Care) at a large teaching hospital, who was accused of inappropriately touching a baby girl. He was able to keep his job. So sad this stuff happens.

Cowboyardee · Nov 7, 2016

Back when I was a CNA, I was pulled into the administrative office. There were a few suits there - people I had never seen in the small facility where I worked. It turned out that a patient who had been under our care for some time had accused me and just about every other male employee she could name of some of the most horrific sexual violations I've ever heard. The suits told me this, and then asked for a statement. I remember being shocked speechless. Giving a coherent statement was almost impossible, and I just stammered a denial.

Now, it turned out these allegations were so over-the-top, implausible, and inconsistent (multiple employees assaulting the patient for hours at a time, employees from different shifts attacking her together, situations that were near 'satanic cult ritual' level in their gruesomeness and conspiratorial implications) that the allegations were ultimately deemed unbelievable and no further actions were taken. No one was prosecuted and no one lost their job. Still, I feel quite certain that if the allegations had been against me alone instead of against every male who had any interaction with the patient, I would have been fired and quite possibly much worse.

Many years later, and I'm still not sure how to feel about the whole thing. The patient who made the false allegations didn't appear to be so disoriented (or disoriented at all, really) as to have no grasp on reality, but she also didn't seem particularly malicious, and it's easier for me to believe that she was just more confused than she seemed - I can understand that and feel sorry for her if that's the case. Still, especially at the time, I felt a huge sense of betrayal. I had been kind to the accuser and thought I did good work for her. It felt like I had been viciously attacked out of the blue by someone I liked. I also had a very uncomfortable feeling that her allegations were merely a few over-the-top details away from being believed.

I don't know how it affected the others who were accused - we never talked about it or even mentioned it to each other. But I can only guess that it bothered them as much and as deeply as it bothered me - we didn't normally avoid talking about patient issues at work. I don't think I've ever discussed it with anyone except my wife, who didn't understand why I was as bothered by it as I was - no one believed the allegations after all. The truth is, I actually feel pretty uncomfortable even typing this out, even though it's been years, even though the allegations were found completely implausible, and even though we're mostly anonymous here. I feel suspect even mentioning it.

I don't know. It sucked at the time. I actually still think about it often, even though this is the first time I've discussed it since it happened. On the other hand, it served as a pretty good warning to me early in my career. I don't want to blow it up into a bigger problem than it is - all sorts of terrible things can happen to you in life, often for no apparent reason. But it's definitely scary as a male nurse.

Ruby Vee, BSN · Nov 10, 2016

Protect yourself as much as possible. I asked my husband what he would recommend, and this is what he suggested:

If the patient is within your "dating range" -- which he defines as 10 years older and 10 years younger than he is -- make sure you have a witness for any potentially invasive procedures. If you don't anticipate any exposure of the patient, leave the door open. (Blood pressure, giving meds as opposed to complete assessment, peri care.). If you have ANY concerns, take a witness of the patient's gender with you. If it works out, you'll do the horrific clean-up on the male patient down the hall while your female colleague takes care of your female patient. You have to be open and flexible to this kind of task switching with your female colleagues, and this includes not complaining about being asked to reposition their patients.

Avoid any kind of "flirty" behavior with your patients. Be friendly and personable, but not flirty.

Females who have a history of sexual assault may not want males anywhere near their private areas. That's not about you. It's about them, so try not to take it personally.

Good luck. I think as long as you use your common sense, you'll be fine. My husband is one of the flirtiest males I've ever met, and he made it 35 years without false accusations!

Ben_Dover · Nov 13, 2016

I always bring a co-worker with me when it comes to dealing with female patients. It may be as simple as placing leads for tele/EKG, but I always do.