male CNA fired for "I love YOU"

hollyster · May 30, 2005

It sounds like you rocked the boat by being smart. Nothing will get the insecure souls circling faster than a smart person who they fear might expose their ineptness or start making suggestions that could lead to change. They probably

did feel threatened but it had nothing to do with I love you or anything sexual. I would talk to an attorney.

medsurgnurse, RN · May 31, 2005

edgreen, I would love to work with you. I love students, not because I think I'm so smart but because I love watching the light of understanding flicker on in their eyes. I wasn't there but my opinion is that your dismissal wasn't anything to do with the 'i love you' statement. More likely, the nurses got offended by inquisitiveness (questions revealed their lack of knowledge). Also, over time I have learn the employers really don't particularly want to keep the above average excellant employee. Its to hard for the other employees to keep up. They know the excellant nurse will be moving on to greener pastures. ( or you when you graduate). But the mediocre nurse will still be there 20 years from now, she/he has no reason to leave.

kadokin, ASN, RN · May 31, 2005

That is so wrong, edgreen. As previous posters have commented, you are probably better off not being in that environment. And, yes, get a lawyer if you think you can stand it/afford it. Better yet, report them to the labor board, dep't of public health, JCAHO. This may sound "catty" to some, but I'll bet they probably need investigating if they disliked you for ASKING QUESTIONS. OMG, what IS going on in that place.!

SmilingBluEyes · May 31, 2005

Yes, you can retain an attorney. Maybe you can speak to one about this and find out what is best to do next. But----Tweety is right; it is expensive and tough to fight such systems. It may be worth it to you. Based on what you say, it sounds as if wrongful termination was indeed the problem. You can fight it. Are you prepared for that?

I wish you well; I am sorry this happened to you.

barefootlady, ADN, RN · May 31, 2005

I read the story with interest. I am sorry and mystified that you were fired. I do think you have a case but is it worth the cost? I hope you get another position that will appreciate your caring and kindness of others soon. Something tells me you will be hearing this place is having problems keeping staff members who are capable and competent workers. I wish you a brighter future and would love to have worked with you too. :balloons:

Havin' A Party!, ASN, RN · Jun 8, 2005

... OTOH, maybe you're better off outta there, since they seem to tolerate some unsafe things. You can find a more supportive environment, I'm sure.

Absolutely!

Sorry this has happened to the poster.

Only concern is that raised by another above, dealing with whether anything related to the matter has been placed in your record.

Good luck!

mtymom · Jun 8, 2005

I'm sorry this happened to you. I just don't get some people. That is very childish if you ask me. I say I'll love you for it all the time; male or female. Maybe I better watch what I say. In my state when a potential employer calls a past employer all they are allowed to say is that they did work for them and wheather or not they would hire them back again. I have heard my boss tell other companies this many times. I feel that you will make a great nurse and I would enjoy working with you also. Good Luck. Hope this helps.

edgreen · Jun 9, 2005

Thank you to everyone who have replied. I haven't yet given up on my dream to become a nurse. I feel this minor set back can be used as a learning experience. being a male, I have to watch my P's and Q's alot closer, because, lets face it, women will stick together in order to save face. ( some, not all, you know who u are!) So do men I guess. but nevertheless, it has made me appreciate bed-side nursing alot more. I don't see myself happy in any other career (unless i could sit around all day and watch mythbusters and get paid for it!!!) I'm trying to keep my head up, but im not sure if its out of depression or malnutrition! J/K anyways, im trying hard to stay positive. see yal on the flip side.

Roy Fokker, BSN, RN · Jun 9, 2005

Having been fired for similar reasons from my first job - I think I can appreciate what the OP feels like.

Trust me, I wouldn't trade the job I have now for the one I got fired from. Those jokers want to run a unit that way? Makes me kinda glad I got fired!

Keep the faith dude - who knows? Maybe you'll find a better job like I did :)

markjrn · Jun 9, 2005

:angryfire Ok, here goes,
I am a nursing student who has bee an CNA for 2 years now. I was recently fired for "harrasment" let me explain...
I was the only male CNA in a pediatric rehab hospital, I worked with around 15 to 20 nurses techs and RT's all the time. we got a new DON a few months back and suddenly I started noticing alot of position changes in management and new pollicies that never got followed up on and things like that. as one of the supervisors was leaving her last day she looked at me and said, "you wont last long, you do your job better than the people that have been here for ten years and that pisses alot of peole off. plus you are a guy." I wasent sure if it was just her being bitter or if it was due to actual information she had. I found out this week.
I was called in to discuss my anual eval when my DON says to me, "i've gotten a complaint about you harrassing a nurse."
Really? i said. "yes, apparantly u told her you loved her."
"Yeah, i asked if she could find me another shift and after 4 hours of asking and wondering if she was going to look for me, she said she had found me an extra shift, so I was like THANK YOU THANK YOU!! I LOVE YOU FOR THIS THANKS!!" i really needed the money for my kids birthday party.
So my DON goes on about how people should feel safe around their workplace and they shouldent feel like there trying to compete with me. so she was terminating me due to conduct. (this woman once told me to stop asking the nurses questions because it made them feel stupid when they didn't know the answer, my thoughts are u SHOULDfeel stupid for not knowing why you are pushing that drug or whats wrong with a patient:angryfire )
so now i am looking for a job. I'm sereously considering gettin my EMT-P first and get some time on the box. just for the experence.
dont that just get you right in the orifice!!!

Maybe a simple "thank you" would have been appropriate.

It sucks, but it's all pretty subjective. For example, where I work recently, a female nurse told a male nurse that she wanted to "ride" him. This makes me uncomfortable. A female nurse was talking to me about having "quickies". This also made me uncomfortable. If you were a woman and told me "I love you" for any reason, I would feel uncomfortable. Plus, my DW would kick your a$$! :rotfl:

In hindsight, just be happy you're out of there without someone trying to actually claim sexual harrassment.

GLORIAmunchkin72 · Jun 9, 2005

I can see where you might come across as a "know it all" and a "smartass". Not saying that you are. I think the friendly "I love YOU" had little bearing on you getting fired

yeah, but apparantly its ok to here about sexual encounters and how bad threr period is and all the little details of their personal life that I dont really care to hear about. we had one nurse who recently got married and we all got to know how "big" he was. its unfortunate that that stuff dosent really offend me, I just let it go. but Im the one who pays the price when someone is offended.
I was also told that it is my responsibility to report things like that even if they dont offend ME. So, i guess im supposed to be the tattle tale!
I am going to keep a notebook on my next job that will have every concern written in it that I have and who I went to about it. this way if this ever happens again, or ANY issues come up, ill have proof that they never got resolved and who is to blame.
Personally, I think ijust pissed off the wrong people by calling them out on STUPID mistakes that a nurse of 15 years should know better (like pushing zyrtec through a IV line! yes the patient was ok, but still)
dont get me wrong, im not cocky, I never called any one out in front of a patient, or fellow staff, I would simply say something like; "now why did xyz happen and why would we do abc to correct this?" everyone knew i was a nursing student and i was interrested in learning at al times. few people actually took the time to explain things and let me learn. but mostly the universal answer was "we'll have to ask the Dr." Im sorry, but when Im a nurse im not going to put my lisence in the hands of any human being, Dr. or not. they make mistakes too!!
Sorry for venting so loudly, but if I am doing things wrong I need to know about it so it dosent happen again. any thoughts?

2bRn-STAT · Jun 9, 2005

Nursemike gave you some great advice. If you think that you got fired for saying I love you then you are as stupid as THEY think you are. I cant even believe they tried to tell you that was the reason. We are "at will" employees without a union and there is not a thing you can do. They can give you any reason as to why they fired you and have something else in your personal file. They could say something as simple as, "we just would like to get someone that is a better fit" and you will be fired, on about your marry way. Take it as a learning experience. Most places LOVE male nurses. I get a vibe of arrogance and cockiness. Dont rub people the wrong way. They could have set you up to get you out of there becuz they feel that you disrupt their environment. If people really knew you, they probably would find a nice guy in you, but when all they know is your "corrective, informative, criticism, it just doesnt fly by too well.

Good Luck, stay a nurse-you dont need to go to EMT to start over- you just need to revamp your approach on people- cuz if it is bad where you were, then it will be bad as an emt. You are good at what you do, so dont leave it.