Is this true about most nurses..

[BecomeNurse06]

I've told some people at work that I'm currently going to school to become a nurse. They told me that I'll be a great nurse because I'm so nice and friendly, but they also told me that most nurses they knew (some of their friends are nurses) are tough people. They said that you have to be tough and be a strong individual, take no crap from anyone, and speaks your mind.

It kind of makes me nervouse about becoming a nurse because I'm not a tough person who speaks her mind. I feel bad saying things I want to say because I'm afraid of hurting other people. I'm the type of person who don't know what to said and step back in an arguement then one who talks back.

My cousin and half sister are nurses and they both are very confidence people who speaks their mind and will burn you down if you argue with them. As for me, I'm the opposite. I guess I'm a soft person.

Do you guys agree with them?

[BecomeNurse06]

Thanks for all the comments on this post. I am kind of a shy and quite person, but I can be assertive at times. I guess I'm just afraid of being yelled at and look stupid to nurses and doctors. I know that I can develope the skills once I'm in the field and just don't worry about what people think of me.

[BecomeNurse06]

Ive been a nurse for 3 years. I was just like you (still am at times) and I was run over by charge nurses and especially assistants. I came home crying many times. You do need to be assertive and not get your feelings hurt too easily. But in time that will come, I think. Your timid attitude can be fruitful for your patients though, you will have patience and a good heart to offer to them. You will be fine. If nursing is your calling, then stick to it.

I'm glad I'm not the only one. I'm glad to know there are people like me out there who's doing fine in nursing. Thanks!

[BecomeNurse06]

I often have people tell me they are surprised I am an ER nurse because I am such a "sweet" person. But I know a ton of "sweet" nurses like me. Like all jobs the spectrum runs from "wimp" to "monster".

There is definately a spot for you somewhere. You will learn to stand up for yourself and your patients but it is a good lesson.

I can honestly say that 99% of the people I encounter everyday are wonderful caring people, from patients to nurses to doctors.

Each encounter is what you make of it for the most part. Of course, there are always an a-hole hiding somewhere.

The people that say everyone out there is nasty and rude need to look in the mirror and see what they are contributing to the mix.

My "schtick" is I start out sweet and nice with everyone, but I can be tough if I have to. The homeless, drunks and psyches seem to respond well to this approach.

Good luck and welcome to the "fray"

Thanks! :nuke:

[leslie :-D]

dang, when i think of what i worried about before becoming a nurse, i have to chuckle now.

i've grown from a bundle of anxieties, to an articulate, confident and competent professional...albeit, sometimes crusty.:)

situations that used to make me cry, now make me raise an eyebrow.

i can now gracefully handle demanding pts/families, patronizing and arrogant md's, and back-stabbing colleagues.

this did not happen overnight, but through a series of events that ultimately resulted in win/win situations.

you will find your niche, and your ways of coping.

you will learn what's important and what to take w/a grain of salt.

you will learn what you have control over, and what you don't...

and you will deal.

because if you don't, you won't survive.

plain and simple.

i have come to respect nsg as a 'brutally tender' profession.

it will challenge your heart as well as your bp.

but it will come to you.

the best nurses i know, are the ones who know how to hit a homerun, using a lot of balls.

their swing is focused, seamless w/a lot of follow-through.

let us know how you do?

i'm sure, it's your time to shine.:icon_hug:

leslie

[proud2b1]

I agree with earle.That is exactly correct,in my opinion!!!!

[proud2b1]

:innerconfI agree with what earle says!!!!!Couldnt have given better advice myself!

[sissiesmama, ASN, RN]

Oh my goodness honey, you need to loose the nice girl skin and toughen up!! Im not trying to be direspectfull but to survive in the nursing biz you have to be assertive and stand up for yourself and dont worry about hurting other peoples feelings. This job is not about worrying about what other people think, it's about the patient that requires your compassion and care!!!! having been a shy/worrying kinda girl when I first started, that got tossed to the side very fast. Drs and old time nurses alike will eat you alive if they smell fear and hesitation. Get out there and be the assertive and great nurse that you can be!!!!!!!!!!

BecomeNurse06 - this poster hit the nail on the head. NOT EVERY ONE is like that, but Ive been a nurse for over 16 years and een eveything from older experienced nurses 'eating their young, belittling them for asking questions, ect. You DO have to have a positive assertive attitude and thick skin. The funniest thing I saw was an LPN and a w. clerk getting into a cat fight at the desk and they started snatching each others wigs off! And they were sisters!!! It was so funny I cried!! But a new nurse will tch flack frm older nurses, CNAs, w. clerks, and on and on. You definetly have to have tough skin!!! Good luck! Oh, and most of them can smell the fear so put on your game face! Ha! Ha!

Anne, RNC:coollook:

[ecnav]

"Aggressiveness" and "assertiveness" are also not the same thing. It takes a while to learn the difference, and progress is usually not a smooth, straight road but a tortuous pathway full of lumps and bumps!

Here are a few examples:

An aggressive nurse is blunt and pushy. An assertive nurse knows that you catch more flies with honey than vinegar.

An aggressive nurse intimidates people into 'respecting' her/him. An assertive nurse knows respect is a two-way street, and expects it in return for giving it.

An aggressive nurse is often cocky and abrasive. An assertive nurse has an air of confidence that lets both patients and superiors know that s/he is in command of the situation.

An aggressive nurse irritates physicians and others with whom s/he must work, often to the detriment of patients. An assertive nurse gets what s/he wants by being courteous but direct, and by having her/his ducks lined up BEFORE calling the doctor, thus avoiding the waste of both professionals' time.

An aggressive nurse is angry and frustrated, and at bottom wishes people would just go to hell. An assertive nurse makes sure they enjoy the trip.

Thank you.

And, how about we make all the aggressive nurses go away. They are ruining our profession.

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

I think your coworkers are right. Hopefully you will find role models and mentors...those that are tough as nails but still nice, kind, friendly and compassionate. Nursing is a profession that demands that of you and you learn it or you leave every day frustrated.

Good luck.

[MaryAnn_RN]

Drs and old time nurses alike will eat you alive if they smell fear and hesitation. Get out there and be the assertive and great nurse that you can be!!!!!!!!!!

That is so true about 'smelling the fear' if they can tell you are scared there are some nurses (that maybe should work in another field ) that will zero in on that.

Still, I found smiling, being polite and then if I had to, stand my ground usually worked.

However usually it is not for yourself that you will need to be assertive, it is for the patient. Once you put the pt first there is no problem being outspoken.

[nyapa, RN]

An aggressive nurse is angry and frustrated, and at bottom wishes people would just go to hell. An assertive nurse makes sure they enjoy the trip.

[wonderbee, BSN, RN]

Yes, you have to be a strong individual but that doesn't mean you can't be courteous and kind. Being assertive has nothing to do with those attributes. Social skills are always appropriate and sadly lacking among nurses. It is not necessary to be a battle axe. It serves no purpose. We do ourselves no favors. People respond to us better when we're approachable. In turn, our day is better for it.