Can we have an unofficial policy where all inappropriate NETY threads are immediately reported to the moderators for breaking TOS? The recent NETY thread was closed as I was typing a response that included a request for people to not buy into the poster who was a new member on post #2 and was insulting people and therefore I decided must have been trolling. In that post I was also about to request that the moderators close the thread. Before I hit send, the thread was closed and very appropriately I will add.
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
The problem is not that a NETY is started. It's the bad behavior people give themselves permission to indulge in in response to the OP. NETY is one of thousands of 'nursing issues' that frequently come up, it's legitimate. People bashing each other is not 'caused' by an OP, we always have a choice in how we respond.
Except that in this case, most of the bashing was done by the OP.
Except that in this case, most of the bashing was done by the OP.
Indeed! In particular, I was thinking about the posters wondering if this subject should be 'allowed' on the forum(s). I'd hate for that subject to be 'taboo', it's as important as first year blues, staffing ratios, yadda yadda.
AKA a troll. The comments by the OP were getting worse and worse. I took it seriously at first but then realized that this was someone with a chip on their shoulders and out to personally attack people.[/quote']
But aren't these always the same people who "experience" NETY? They're ALWAYS the victims.
But aren't these always the same people who "experience" NETY? They're ALWAYS the victims.
It could be that they are the most vocal about it. In my first couple of years I experienced it but wouldn't have admitted it to another nurse. It's more like I learned about lateral violence and then saw that some of my experiences were that. A 'real' victim is usually ashamed of it, blames themselves and quiet about it. They don't go 'round drawing a ton of attention to themselves about it. So the loud attention seeking 'victims' give the rest of them bad press. They almost always are the primary source of their own troubles.
Thanks. Found it. I was scrolling on the daily new topics pages. I've read more, and less, entertaining. Usually I miss the good ones until some mod comes around and removes the tasty posts. No matter how many hours in a day one spends here, the good stuff always happens when you dare to step away!
Ha! I usually have AN on in the background, so when I grow weary of whatever I was staring at on the 'puter, I can click on over :)
I happen to think a good rule would be that brand new posters no be able to start threads for a while. .
Brilliant idea! I am involved on another forum that does exactly this and it seems to work well at weeding out the trolls. No starting new threads until a member has responded to a certain number of posts, and until the member reaches a certain number of posts they are limited to responding in only a new member area. They can read any threads in any area of the forum, but can't respond until they have reached enough posts to graduate out of the new member area of the forum.
It could be that they are the most vocal about it. In my first couple of years I experienced it but wouldn't have admitted it to another nurse. It's more like I learned about lateral violence and then saw that some of my experiences were that. A 'real' victim is usually ashamed of it, blames themselves and quiet about it. They don't go 'round drawing a ton of attention to themselves about it. So the loud attention seeking 'victims' give the rest of them bad press. They almost always are the primary source of their own troubles.
I was being sarcastic, in light of the fact that so many of the posters who talk about it appear to bring it upon themselves, as we tease it out of them.
It could be that they are the most vocal about it. In my first couple of years I experienced it but wouldn't have admitted it to another nurse. It's more like I learned about lateral violence and then saw that some of my experiences were that. A 'real' victim is usually ashamed of it, blames themselves and quiet about it. They don't go 'round drawing a ton of attention to themselves about it.
And that's why lateral violence continues, because no one wants to talk about it. It's like school bullying, which wasn't taken seriously until kids started dying. Denying it and banning conversation about it will only make the problem persist. Doctors were allowed to yell, scream, and throw things at nurses for a long time. No one (I hope) defends that behavior today.
How would a "NETY" ban work? No venting? Don't vent about co-workers mistreating you, because it's all your fault?
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
It needs to go both ways. I do realize there is bullying and mean-spiritedness all across the board. HOWEVER, there are new, young nurses who eat their OLD, too. I have had several come out the gate (nursing school) with horrible attitudes, very rude and thinking they should get the shifts they want without waiting their turn-----it goes both ways. These folks run to "mama" (the manager) with every little complaint without having the maturity to discuss their problems with their coworkers. They love to complain about EVERYthing that does not go their way. These people are just as big a problem as the "crusty old bats" who "eat their young".
NETY only describes the phenomenon of "old eating young" and that is a problem. But there are PLENTY of young coming out of school with crappy attitudes and unwilling to listen, learn and respect the experience of their older peers. When I graduated, I listened to my more experienced peers and respected their experience. I did not like all of them; some were mean, but I found I often could get past that with some of that old "killing them with kindness". Most people respond positively if you are kind, respectful and decent.
Again it goes both ways.
The old Golden Rule applies. Be nice, get along. You do not have to like your coworkers, but you do need to respect them. ALL of them.
In that case, can we have a moratorium on "All nurses younger or less experienced than me are spoiled, entitled, and incompetent?"
Ruby Vee, BSN
17 Articles; 14,051 Posts
Except that in this case, most of the bashing was done by the OP.