I really hate going to clinicals

[raindrop]

Here I am on vacation, but already dreading starting school again b/c of clinicals.

I've pinpointed a few reasons why I hate them, and I'm hoping someone here can help me out...

1) It's not so much the fear of the unknown that haunts me when I roll out of bed at 5:30 a.m., it's that I'm scared that something bad is going to happen, and the finger is going to be pointed at me.

2) One of my instructors rides the hell out of me and I don't understand why. I was warned about her from previous students. they told me that she finds one person in the group to ride, and she rides them during the whole rotation with her - which was 6 weeks for me last semester....WTH?....

I always get there before any other student so I can get organized. I never smart back, etc, etc....but, i do get VERY nervous when she comes around me that I always make a silly mistake or say something silly - nothing major at all...i.e.,

I put a blood pressure cuff on on of my patients upside down, but realized it myself. She embarassed the hell out of me. And one time I grabbed for some gloves to give an IV push and she asked me what I needed them for...."do you see any drainage coming from his IV?" Then rolled her eyes.

She once cornered me and told me that I need to be more assertive with the staff nurses because they are using me to do everything and now I've put HER behind schedule and how she may write me up. I cried when she walked away.

I was looking thru one of the charts and I guess the unit clerk was looking for it. She told me to go give it to her, while adding..."she's got your number now" WTH?

I'm going to have her for 6 more weeks next semester, and I hope she will find someone else to pick on b/c I don't know if I can take anymore. The stuff that I listed is only a few, and it's very hard to describe the condescending tone she uses and the faces she gives.

Also, in post conferance one time we were talking about the Hesi test. That is the "final" exam after 4th semester and we get 3 tries to pass it. If you don't pass by your 3rd try, she stated, "that means you are too stupid and you need to repeat 4th semester - hahaha" I thought that was very unprofessional. In my opinion, you must have something going on upstairs to make it to 4th semester. If you don't pass Hesi or state boards, you probably have some type of anxiety issue. That response was not called for at all.

She also embarasses people during post conference.

So, how do I deal with her? I was thinking of going to my doc to see if he would put me on Zyprexa or Ativan to take PRN, and I would take one before every one of her clinicals. I absolutely dread them.

Any other advice you can give will be greatly appreciated.

[dustydog]

This is a very sad, familiar story. We have them at our school as well and one in particular is infamous and thoroughly enjoys being the bully. I think its probably just natural that toxic people like this make you ill. Most of us just don't operate on this level and it drains the life out of ya to just get thru it. I have been one of her targets and decided to write the incident up in a professional, nonemotional fashion and basically told the director of the program how it had adversely impacted my learning capability. Word went out to the instructors in some form or fashion. When I go back I will have her as my theory instructor and expect there to be some confrontation. Personally, I know I can't live with myself if I don't say something when she starts her little silly tirade. I will keep it professional, but I will also call her on her unprofessional behavior. I've been around a bit. I know these witches know better than to do what they do to students. I especially get bent out of shape when they stalk you just waiting for you to make the wrong moves. :uhoh21: I feel protective of the young ones in our class that would make such excellent nurses but fall prey to these unstable types who wouldn't know compassion from a fomite. It's ok to be afraid, but go in there anyway and do your best and know that you will leave these cretins in the dust when you finish.

[S.N. Visit, BSN, RN]

[quote= I'm paying very good money for this education and I expect a teacher, not a judge, when I'm at clinical.

QUOTE]

That is a classic come-back! I love it :chuckle

[LPN1974, LPN]

I agree with what the last 4 posters all just said. I didn't have to go thru the experience in nursing school of having a bully for an instructor, but I have worked under a one for 20-something years. If it were not having so many years invested on my job I would leave today. However, I have learned to somewhat deal with it, mostly I try to stay out of her way, but in some situations I have called her on her bullying. And she DID back down. She is also an "eye-roller" and I find that very unprofessional.

She has always had one person to pick on most, but has bullied all of us to some degree. Then she's also had her favorites, too. Her all time favorite was a tattletale and that person was always tattling on others to get her brownie points.

It just makes me sick to hear about nurses doing this to other nurses, even more so a nursing INSTRUCTOR doing it to students. I have wondered why nursing schools didn't do more to start combating the bully situation while students were students. Now I know why...instructors can be bullies, too.

Best advice I can offer is not to let her see your fear of her. They THRIVE on that.

[bookwormom]

Dear Raindrop,

I graduated in '75, but can identify with your experience. In my case, it was a community health instructor. Looking back, I don't think I was an outstanding student, and I didn't have a clue on how to write a care plan, etc. But it all came together after graduation. I went on to graduate school and am now an instructor myself. My advice: just hang in and do your best. Your goal is not really to please your instructor, but rather to learn nursing. It sounds to me like you are learning, and I urge you to have faith in yourself.

Sincerely,

Bookwormom

[mitchsmom]

Best advice I can offer is not to let her see your fear of her. They THRIVE on that.

I agree. I have an instructor that preys on scared students who lack confidence or who are weaker in their performance &/or preparation &/or academic work. I was always one of those people when I was younger... if I had done nursing school when I was young I would have cried every day I bet... but I'm older now and I probably have more confidence than the instructor - I think she's more rattled by me than the other way around! That's a laugh when I think about how thin-skinned and underconfident I was at one time! Now my instructor doesn't even spend much time on me compared to the other students because she thinks that I'm ok with everything (and I am for the most part, and seek out her help if I'm not).

Don't fear her... you KNOW you can do this program and be a good nurse (you DO, right? If you don't then you need to get that firmly set in your mind 100%)... so she is mearly another step in your path. And if you can't make it, fake it... feel it inside or let it out later, but develop a thick skin and don't let her see you sweat. Be prepared at all times, appear confident and unrattled. At an appropriate point, ask her something mundane/conversational, like how her cat is or where she got her PhD to show that you are calm and collected. I know it sounds impossible to do but when you get there you won't look back. And she'll concentrate her time on someone else.

[Euskadi1946]

Hang in there Raindrop, I had several instructors just like her and was dropped twice from my nursing program but I didn't let that stop me. Trust me, you will be thankful to these instructors when you graduate and you're out on the floors. I had alot of nightmares about nursing school, but I'm grateful for the instructors being such b***hs because they want to make sure they graduate good nurses. If they or one of their familiy members should be fortunate to get you as a nurse someday down the road, they want to make sure that they/they're family members are getting the best care possible and they will because they taught you. You will toughen up and when you're out on the floors you will appreciate it.

[Soleilpie]

hang in there raindrop, i had several instructors just like her and was dropped twice from my nursing program but i didn't let that stop me. trust me, you will be thankful to these instructors when you graduate and you're out on the floors. i had alot of nightmares about nursing school, but i'm grateful for the instructors being such b***hs because they want to make sure they graduate good nurses. if they or one of their familiy members should be fortunate to get you as a nurse someday down the road, they want to make sure that they/they're family members are getting the best care possible and they will because they taught you. you will toughen up and when you're out on the floors you will appreciate it.

granted a person may become tougher after dealing with an instructor with no sense of professionalism, but i think this also perpetuates the bullying environment that continues to exist within the nursing profession. in some cases, this kind of bullying may weaken an already insecure person. it's the instructor's job to teach these nurses a sense of professionalism, not how to survive in a bullying environment. this bullying environment shouldn't even exist and so the goal should be to end it. the start to ending it is by having instructors behave how they want future nurse to behave. in other words, instructors should be role models. if you want to teach students about bullying, then discuss it and let them know that they may encounter less than professional nurses and how to handle them. nursing students are already on an emotional rollercoaster. they don't need an instructor to belittle them on top of it. i seriously doubt this instructor has a legitimate reason for behaving this way. is this the bullying role playing class in disguise?

[dustydog]

Well said Soleilpie. When I went thru LPN school the instructors were awesome role models. They were professionals thru and thru and held us to high standards but without the abuse and ridicule you hear so much of. It was simply not professional to act in this manner. As such, we were never afraid to approach them or fear intimidation and embarrassment. We learned faster and better without the fear which translated into more productive clinicals. So many of the students I encounter now think that this cruel behavior from instructors is just part of the ritual of becoming a nurse and in most cases just suffer in silence and accept it. I try to imagine the other instructors I've had in my life behaving the way some of these prima donas do and I just can't. They've gotten away with it for so long they may actually think - and have others think that this is an acceptable method of instruction Abuse is abuse and it is unnecessary and wrong.

[purplemania, BSN, RN]

I suggest a conference with her IF she starts this up again this semester. Maybe have it in the presence of another teacher or the Dean. Or go straight to the Dean. The good news is, you are getting practice in dealing with difficult people. So far you have managed to stay afloat and that is a good thing. Your fears are very personal, but sometimes we tend to globalize our fears and let paranoia settle in. Been there and done that. As for the test, take one day at a time. Almost EVERYBODY passes it the first time. Don't worry about it now.

[jeepgirl, LPN, NP]

I use gloves for my IV pushes. It is stupid not to... when you flush during your first saline (SASH), you're aspirating back to see if you get a blood return. you're very very close to an infectious body fluid. i'd sure as heck use gloves. What if that INT cap fell off? Or something became disconnected?

And what is the problem with using the B/P cuff upside down anyway? All a BP cuff does is use pressure to obliterate blood flow through an artery. The cuffs I have used have an air bladder inside that is centered vertically in the cuff with a little mark to help you center it.

As long as you have the cuff centered over the artery, its going to blow up, apply pressure, measure the amount of pressure in the cuff and do its job. it's stupid to get pissy over something like that... it looks like she has no critical thinking skills to think through the mechanics of how a manual b/p cuff works. all i can say is "puh - lease".

The reading should not be different if the bladder of the cuff is upside down or not. heck, if you use it upside down then you're not smacking the patient in the face with the tubing thats connected to the wall.

now, i don't know about the dinamap ones. but it should not matter while taking a manual b/p. i'd just ignore her and do what she wants while you are forced to be in her clinical. then, when you graduate, hopefully you'll be able to look at what she taught you and be able to pick out what was really important and what was not.

we all have different styles. but it is my experience that some of these people are just SO picky that they want everything want their way. and they aren't open to different techniques that still fall within the "proper" realm.

it is control issues, honey! take it at that. as i have learned, people like this are really miserable inside and have internal chaos. so, they try to control others around then. just remind yourself that... and believe it... and you'll be a much happier person!

[Mystery5]

We had a former clinical instructor hired this year at our facility. There's an old saying, you know, that those that can't do, teach. Well, this lady supposedly had these great credentials. But the story that sticks in my mind is that she was helping in the CCU and needed to get a UA from a Foley. So, she deflated the balloon instead, and accidentally pulled out the cath. Turns out she was RATHER rusty on her real life skills.

When she was told that she's need more orientation, she got pretty huffy, I'm told, and quit!

[raindrop]

Thanks alot guys. I printed out all of your responses and I will read them all the time during my clinicals with her.

I REALLY don't want to report her. There are 3 nursing instructors for my class (including her). They all teach a different area; however, we have clinicals with each and every one of them. We have 3 rotations total per semester. 2 of them are for 4 weeks, the other one is for 6. Blahhhhh. 2 days a week.

All three of them are very, very close. They've all worked together for eons. They told us on the first day of school that they "communicate with eachother everyday about everything, so, don't you people try to pull any fast ones by us. It won't work. HaHaHa."

There is one that I really like alot, and I know she likes me, but I just don't feel very comfy talking to her about my problem with Paula. I will DEFINETELY speak up though, to the director, when my rotation is over with her - if I haven't had a TIA that is.

Anyhow, I will just grin & bear it, and say lots of prayers until then.

Merry Christmas!