I started my CNA class this week (it is required for acceptance into nursing school here). I was telling him about the different things I'll be doing as a CNA and then as a nurse. He became upset when I talked about bathing people.
My husband is concerned that I will be touching other men to bathe them. I tried to explain that it's just a bath, kind of like bathing a child, nothing sexual, but he's still concerned.
Now, he hasn't gotten angry or tried to talk me out of nursing, but he still isn't comfortable with me touching other men. Any suggestions on how to ease his mind?
I can see where everyone is coming from. I have also endured a controlling, abusive relationship. It makes me hypersensitive to the "signs" with others now because I don't want to see anyone hurt as I was. I'm sure that was the kind of place others were coming from. This certainly could be a first sign of a problem.
Obviously the young lady who posted is not in that situation. I agree that age is probably a big part of what is going on here. We can thank the media image of "naughty nurses" for a big part of this problem.
Definitely share your class materials with him. Reassure him that his worries are important to you and you are glad he cares. There can be sexualization by the patient of personal care. Not many of us get through without being sexually harrassed at some point in our careers. There are ways to handle it and you will learn those too. Assure him that there is always someone there to help you out if any man is taking the professional care you give the wrong way or becomes physically threatening. I'm sure he really is concerned for your welfare and safety. Good Luck.
We can thank the media image of "naughty nurses" for a big part of this problem.
I don't know how the media is going to project an image of a male nurse??
Unfortunately, the media has created an image for the public where the female nurses are portrayed as vampy sex kittens and the male nurses are obviously gay, or less masculine.
It couldn't be further from the truth, but this is what a lot of people think about us.
Unfortunately, the media has created an image for the public where the female nurses are portrayed as vampy sex kittens and the male nurses are obviously gay, or less masculine.
It couldn't be further from the truth, but this is what a lot of people think about us.
Thats good! That will prevent more and more male nurses from coming into this field. As long as I get good pay, I'm just gonna tell all the girls I'm a medical doctor. I'm going to live in a cheap area so that I got lots of money left for me to travel around the world.
Its better than working as a engineer in a tense competition company in a expensive place and still just getting 94K a year. I'd rather only get 80K as a nurse in a suburban area in California and live in a big house with a swimming pool so I can invite girls to come party with me every night.
Specializes in clinical pathways - ED, home infusion, IT, lab.
Kinda reminds me of some folks' discomfort with women breastfeeding - seeing it as something sexual.
Tell him it's like a (male or female) gyne doing an exam - just getting the job done (in a professional, informed manner). Don't get me started on common cultures' representations of nurses as hotties/sexpots, etc., that's been around for 50+ years...
when i was in my psych rotation in school, a psych pt had written me a wonderful poem.
he had been a published author and his writing talents were evident.
when i showed my husband the poem, he instinctively wanted to know "who this guy was and why was he writing me poetry".
i gave him a quick dopeslap and swift kick, conversation over.
a yr or two later, i saw this pt out on the street and i yelled out "hi john!!!!"
my husband, who was with me, asked me who that was and i told him.
his eyes bugged out of his head saying, "that's him???"
i think the jealousy/insecurity thing is instinctive in many, and these guys just can't connect the dots.
yet when they see these people, a big "oh" floods their face.
they get it.
they see it.
click.
i'm with sue and jls...
i'm not ready to call this guy an abuser because they don't immediately see what we do.
the biggie is, these guys/gals needs to know how ridiculous they sound.
and if these jealousies persist, then houston, we have a problem.
leslie
I agree with you here!! Maybe the husband just doesnt understand the reality of the job. Its not like they show on TV with the sexy nurse washing the sexy man come on!!
Well, this is a wild thought - off the site living their lives?
The cavalry will arrive. They always do. :)
I thought there was a mod assigned to every few threads. There seem to be so many. I have no idea how the whole "mod thing" works. It seems like some threads have mods breaking in constantly, so I assumed as threads are happening "they are right there" watching it unfold.
I thought there was a mod assigned to every few threads. There seem to be so many. I have no idea how the whole "mod thing" works. It seems like some threads have mods breaking in constantly, so I assumed as threads are happening "they are right there" watching it unfold.
Nah. The mods each have their own forums and check in here and there as time permits. Works that way on every site.
Back to the original post, my grandfather said the same thing to my grandmother back in the 70's. He was in no way abusive. However, he was born in the 1920's, and he probably also just didn't like here working outside the home. She quit working. I think it sucks because she worked really hard to get her RN. However, that is there relationship, and they have a different belief about how relationships should work. It is possible that this husband just needs more education from his wife about her job. I don't know. It's hard to make a judgment call over the 'net.
getinfall
51 Posts
We can thank the media image of "naughty nurses" for a big part of this problem.
I don't know how the media is going to project an image of a male nurse??