Hurt and Betrayed

jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B · Nov 23, 2015

This is a real issue. And I am so sorry that this has happened to you. I am curious as to how the other person reacted when you confronted this with them. Apologize? Denied? Did the person offer to do "damage control"?

The reason I ask is that it could affect you going forward. And frankly am a bit shocked that students who want to become nurses didn't nip this in the bud from the get go. The bottom line is that you are paying money to attend school. So you need to get the full benefits of the education. And if people "won't work with you" or some other such nonsense, it will not work well for your education or goals.

Highly regarded professors do not take this lightly. And I would have conversation with your academic advisor on what has occurred, and how to move forward successfully. Most universities have a zero tolerance process for this stuff.

And you know, after speaking with your professor, you may want to just tell your side of it as a presentation in class. Yes, agreed that it is none of anyone's business. But now it has been disclosed. And a good lesson in privacy in healthcare and in future careers. About differences, and how that can strengthen a team. And how devastating this kind of disclosure can be on a person. Meet it head on.

Another source of strength for you is your family, perhaps a support group, a mentor of some kind who has walked your shoes.

Wishing you nothing but the best.

ixchel · Nov 23, 2015

I am so sorry. I agree this needs to be reported. Sharing with your advisor is a good idea. Looking at the bigger picture, if this friend were your nurse, this would be a HIPAA violation. That is not taken lightly, and it shouldn't be. Those of us with chronic conditions that may encourage judgment don't need more speculation from people who don't get it.

I hope you are able to find a good resolution for this.

meanmaryjean, DNP, RN · Nov 23, 2015

I am sorry that this has happened to you. However, if you are in your first semester of a BSN program- you have likely not even begun clinicals yet. This is NOT 'incivility in nursing' - this is you sharing something you would have liked to have kept secret, and the person you trusted not being trustworthy. It has NOTHING to do with HIPAA because a conversation between two college freshman is not 'protected health information'.

In future, if you don't want people knowing your business- don't TELL them your business. But you already learned that lesson, right?

MeiDei · Nov 23, 2015

I am sorry that this has happened to you. However, if you are in your first semester of a BSN program- you have likely not even begun clinicals yet. This is NOT 'incivility in nursing' - this is you sharing something you would have liked to have kept secret, and the person you trusted not being trustworthy. It has NOTHING to do with HIPAA because a conversation between two college freshman is not 'protected health information'.
In future, if you don't want people knowing your business- don't TELL them your business. But you already learned that lesson, right?

On the contrary, I did not share my personal information on this matter. If you read the post, it isn't anyone else's business. This person was under the false assumption and acted with such. Regardless of whether clinicals have begun for my class, it IS incivility in nursing in an academic setting. I would suggest reading the new position statement set by ANA July 22, 2015. "Incivility, bullying, and workplace violence also occur in academic setting, thus affecting students, faculty members, and all people in the campus community." I am a junior in my universities program and I have earned my right to be here. Regardless, it is a violation of my privacy.

MeiDei · Nov 23, 2015

This is a real issue. And I am so sorry that this has happened to you. I am curious as to how the other person reacted when you confronted this with them. Apologize? Denied? Did the person offer to do "damage control"?
The reason I ask is that it could affect you going forward. And frankly am a bit shocked that students who want to become nurses didn't nip this in the bud from the get go. The bottom line is that you are paying money to attend school. So you need to get the full benefits of the education. And if people "won't work with you" or some other such nonsense, it will not work well for your education or goals.
Highly regarded professors do not take this lightly. And I would have conversation with your academic advisor on what has occurred, and how to move forward successfully. Most universities have a zero tolerance process for this stuff.
And you know, after speaking with your professor, you may want to just tell your side of it as a presentation in class. Yes, agreed that it is none of anyone's business. But now it has been disclosed. And a good lesson in privacy in healthcare and in future careers. About differences, and how that can strengthen a team. And how devastating this kind of disclosure can be on a person. Meet it head on.
Another source of strength for you is your family, perhaps a support group, a mentor of some kind who has walked your shoes.
Wishing you nothing but the best.

Thank you for your advice. When confronted, all accounts were acknowledged by this person and after a lengthy discussion, an apology was made. According to our CoN, we do have a zero tolerance policy. I have a mixture of emotions going through me right now and I spoke with my husband about it last night. Our campus has a therapist free for the students so I think I may go speak with them about it and get a better understanding of the situation. As to damage control, that was not offered and I wish I would have thought of that at the time.

meanmaryjean, DNP, RN · Nov 23, 2015

How did this person obtain your personal health information then? If you carefully re-read your original post, it appears that you shared with this person. "Known for a year and trusted" would seem to indicate that they did not go snooping into your files at the school, but rather that they came upon this knowledge by knowing you.

elkpark · Nov 23, 2015

It's school. People talk, and gossip. That's how life is. If someone on the faculty, or other employee of the school, disclosed your personal info (or inappropriately allowed a student access to your school records), I agree that's a serious problem, but, unless that's the case, I don't see what responsibility the school bears in some beef between you and another student. The school can't control everything the students do and say to each other. Everyone's got to be a victim these days ...

JustBeachyNurse, LPN · Nov 23, 2015

It makes a difference if you "shared" your personal information in trust & confidence vs this classmate saw your file, eavesdropped on a private discussion or intentionally sought out your information.

Your OP implies this classmate knew about your condition/accommodations because you shared in confidence.

HIPAA does not apply without a provider patient relationship & insurance billing even if incidental. If in US and this student somehow obtained any medical or educational information about you from school FERPA applies (regardless of how--overhearing, works in office and happened across your file, etc). Once 18 & out of HS your parent can access your confidential school files without your permission.

I just had a major incident at my son's school. It was known a secretary was sharing confidential student information with non staff/non essential personnel. She got caught by sharing an assumption that was wholly inaccurate. Of course the secretary blames the affected parent that she got caught.

MeiDei · Nov 23, 2015

It makes a difference if you "shared" your personal information in trust & confidence vs this classmate saw your file, eavesdropped on a private discussion or intentionally sought out your information.
Your OP implies this classmate knew about your condition/accommodations because you shared in confidence.
HIPAA does not apply without a provider patient relationship & insurance billing even if incidental. If in US and this student somehow obtained any medical or educational information about you from school FERPA applies (regardless of how--overhearing, works in office and happened across your file, etc). Once 18 & out of HS your parent can access your confidential school files without your permission.
I just had a major incident at my son's school. It was known a secretary was sharing confidential student information with non staff/non essential personnel. She got caught by sharing an assumption that was wholly inaccurate. Of course the secretary blames the affected parent that she got caught.

As with your case, the same is with mine. The sharing of information is based on assumption that is inaccurate. Yes, I trusted this person and from my post, I meant I trusted in a way that I did not think this person would spread rumors about me. I don't disclose this particular information with anyone.

JustBeachyNurse, LPN · Nov 23, 2015

As with your case, the same is with mine. The sharing of information is based on assumption that is inaccurate. Yes, I trusted this person and from my post, I meant I trusted in a way that I did not think this person would spread rumors about me. I don't disclose this particular information with anyone.

Different issue then. If you told her and she told others very different. If she assumed or found out through other means, while not necessarily HIPAA it's a total different issue. I've seen people make assumptions based on seeing someone's prescription forgetting alternate and off label uses.

LPNtoRNin2016OH, LPN · Nov 23, 2015

While what this student did was a crap move, since you did directly inform her about it, I do not think she did anything that could ger her legally in trouble or kicked out of school. I think you did the right thing about confronting her. Would it help if you told your classmates WHAT the actual issue was and not what the student is assuming it to be? It could help. Often the rumor is worse than the actual truth. Then she will most likley look silly anyways and feel embarassed.