How do you remain civil with coworker's you hate :)

chevyv, BSN, RN · Sep 29, 2011

I try to stay professional and stick only to what needs to be done at work and stay within protocol. The back stabbers...I try to get busy doing my thing as far away as possible. I also try to build a working relationship with them. I can usually (but not always) find some common ground. We all need help at times so I help out and make sure I say please and thank you when they return the help. It's not always easy, but most people need to have some balance with coworkers.

xtxrn, ASN, RN · Sep 29, 2011

I'm glad I'm not them. I'm glad they don't come home with me. I'm glad that there are a lot more good things in my life than someone who isn't worth the time of day to think badly of.... seriously. Anybody that lousy isn't worth the energy.

Think of some mental picture of them that helps ease the stress, and whenever they bug you, train yourself to think of that picture- of them. The thought/mental image can be anything you want. Then remember you don't have to spend the majority of your life with them....

Some people just aren't worth the time. Hate (or whatever) involves a lot of energy. They take enough by their presence. Don't give them more :)

OCNRN63, RN · Sep 29, 2011

Hello :) How are you? How do you keep your calm and cool when you working with people you can't stand. How do you work with them. How do you stay at a job for years and still have a good attitude. How do people stay at one place for 2 to 5 years or more. How do you deal with annoying and back stabbing co-workers. Thank you.

Easy. You go to work to work, period. Anything extra is gravy. Occupy yourself more with your work and less with your co-workers.

CharleeJo.RN · Sep 29, 2011

Oh lord, I've dealt with that at quite a few places. My last job I was at for over a year, and was happier than anyone in the world the day I quit because I was moving. It was wonderful! There were maybe 5 people (out of 60+) that I didn't dislike. So many of them were horrible, spiteful, insubordinate, disrespectful, gossiping biotches.

So how did I deal with it? I just went to work, did my job, minded my own business, didn't participate in gossip (if someone were saying something, I might listen, but NEVER gave any comments). They probably thought I was anti-social, but I frankly didn't care about their pettiness or being social with people I didn't care for anyway. My boss felt i was a great nurse and those that mattered respected and appreciated me. If i needed to delegate something, I did - if I needed help, I'd ask someone who was helpful - and at the end of the day, I'd vent to my family, fiancee' and friends. Work is work, and I left it there at the end of the day. :)

CharleeJo.RN · Sep 29, 2011

I agree with xtxrn. Hating someone takes way too much energy - they aren't worth it. Just keep a smile on your face, do what you have to do, and get on with your life.

Juwon · Sep 29, 2011

always stay focused on the primary focus, and that is providing quality and exceptional care to your patients. tune all the other b.s. out. Keep a smile on your face, people who know they upset you feeds off it. Misery loves company.

Home Health Columnist / Guide · Sep 29, 2011

moved to our nurse colleague / patient relations many helpful links at top forum.

ProgressiveActivist, BSN, RN · Oct 4, 2011

You have no friends in nursing, treat them as you would any business partner -contact-associate. Keep yourself in this professional mindset. You can discuss the weather, books, movies, children and NEVER talk about sex, religion, politics or other employees.

Keep it professional and the rest of them will give you the respect that you deserve.

KeepingItRealEeyore · Jan 5, 2016

It seems like the more one tries to stay away from negative co-workers the more they flock to you. I hate a majority of my co-workers. Some of them feel entitled because they have been there so long. The unit I work on is very clicky. I thought I was hired to work, not be around caddy,backstabbers, throw under the bus, run to the manager, think they know it all, and lazy people.

dec2007 · Jan 6, 2016

Easy. You go to work to work, period. Anything extra is gravy. Occupy yourself more with your work and less with your co-workers.

Very sound advice, although I don't always find it all that easy. I am constantly reminding myself that I am there (at work) to do the very best I can for whomever I am caring for that day, and that the folks that come to work just to socialize are not important. The one time this is hard is when your patient requires a team (someone to go get blood, someone to order labs, two people to clean them up and someone else to hang new drips), and you can't stop the chatter long enough to get anyone to help you!

dec2007 · Jan 6, 2016

You have no friends in nursing, treat them as you would any business partner -contact-associate. Keep yourself in this professional mindset. You can discuss the weather, books, movies, children and NEVER talk about sex, religion, politics or other employees.
Keep it professional and the rest of them will give you the respect that you deserve.

Additionally, I always assume whatever is talked about at the nurse's station is overheard by patients and their family members, and that they don't want to hear about anyone's boyfriend, family drama, Facebook conflicts, etc. etc. etc.