I have my FB name as a modified alias of my real name, due to a few parents crossing boundaries in the past. It is easier if parents can not find me on FB, rather than having the find me and friend request me.
I strive to not share personal info but I struggle with that. If I'm gonna work in your home for 8 hours I'd like to have a good rapport. It is a tough balance, at least I have found it to be.
I have my FB name as a modified alias of my real name, due to a few parents crossing boundaries in the past. It is easier if parents can not find me on FB, rather than having the find me and friend request me.
I strive to not share personal info but I struggle with that. If I'm gonna work in your home for 8 hours I'd like to have a good rapport. It is a tough balance, at least I have found it to be.
That balance is tough. Too little info and you're cold, unapproachable, and distant. Too much and they will think you share their info, they will find something to dislike, etc. Either way feels like a no win.
I will discuss generic things. I will discuss my kids to a certain point. I use their nicknames rather than their real names... and I don't disclose the town I live in. I'd directly asked where I live, I'll say way out in the country... not really true but it's nicer than saying "none of your business".
Specializes in Cardio-Pulmonary; Med-Surg; Private Duty.
I talk about my son and the fact that he plays hockey (and that I drive him 50 miles one-way to hockey practice), and if they are an animal family, I talk about my two rescued black Labs and their neuroses.
I don't get into anything really personal, but I do like for them to see that I understand what it's like to love your child and make sacrifices for your child's sake. And ditto on the animal thing -- if they're a dog family, knowing that I'm also a dog person gives us something in common and can make them feel more comfortable with having me in their home with their dog, knowing that I won't freak out if the dog comes into the room, or if I get some dog hair on my clothing, etc.
That's not to say that a non-parent or non-pet-person can't also build a rapport, but it gives us a common subject that is safe to discuss while still feeling more personal than just talking about the weather, etc.
I do have to share my religious beliefs esp during Christmas and birthdays.
One of the nurses on the cases invited the family to her big cookout.
They went but i am not sure if they had a blast. I only know because i was working with the kid while they went at 12am on a Friday night.
What do you mean by "I have" to share my religious beliefs? Do you mean you feel compelled? How has that worked out for you? I'm not being snarky, just genuinely curious, as I can see that being a potential crud storm of complaints to your agency.
What do you mean by "I have" to share my religious beliefs? Do you mean you feel compelled? How has that worked out for you? I'm not being snarky, just genuinely curious, as I can see that being a potential crud storm of complaints to your agency.
I've never once felt that I HAD TO share my religious beliefs... or lack thereof.
Believe smartnurse lives in a region where religion tends to become a part of nearly every conversation. She would be pressured to participate. I know how much I was pressured about religion when I lived in those areas. It bothered me so much I remember it to this day, decades later.
Specializes in Cardio-Pulmonary; Med-Surg; Private Duty.
Actually, the comment about Christmas and birthdays makes me think of Jehovah's Witnesses.
I do not typically use Wikipedia as a source, but in this instance, the information is sufficient for the situation:
Weddings, anniversaries, and funerals are observed, though they avoid incorporating certain traditions they see to have pagan origins.[138][139]The Watchtower has stated that the use of wedding rings by Witnesses is acceptable, even though wedding rings may have first been used by pagans, based on its conclusion that there is no definite evidence wedding rings were used "as part of false religiouspractices" (emphasis from original).[140] Witnesses typically observe wedding anniversaries, with the Watch Tower Society noting that wedding anniversaries apparently do not stem from pagan origins.[141]
Other common celebrations and religious or national holidays such as birthdays, Halloween, andChristmas[142] are not celebrated because they believe that these continue to involve "false religious beliefs or activities."[143][144] Watch Tower Society publications rule out the celebration of Mother's Daybecause of a claimed link with pagan gods[145] and concerns that giving "special honor and worship" to mothers is a form of "creature worship" that could turn people away from God.[146] The Society also directs Witnesses to shun May Day, New Year's Day and Valentine's Day celebrations because of their pagan origins.[147]
Their opposition to birthdays is said to be based on how the Bible presents them. Watch Tower Society publications note that the only birthday celebrations explicitly mentioned in the Bible are those of an unnamed Pharaoh and Herod Antipas, and that both were associated with executions, and neither celebrant was a servant of God.[148] Though some religions interpret Job 1:4 to indicate birthday feasts of Job's sons, Jehovah's Witnesses interpret them as a circuit of feasts from one house to the next.[149]The Bible does not show Jesus or his apostles celebrating birthdays and The Watchtower claims the absence of any record of the date of the birth of Jesus or his apostles indicates that "God does not want us to celebrate any of these birthdays".[150]
What do you mean by "I have" to share my religious beliefs? Do you mean you feel compelled? How has that worked out for you? I'm not being snarky, just genuinely curious, as I can see that being a potential crud storm of complaints to your agency.
I cannot say "merry Christmas" nor "happy birthday".
If i do not say anything back,most will think i am being rude.
Specializes in Complex pedi to LTC/SA & now a manager.
I cannot say "merry Christmas" nor "happy birthday".
If i do not say anything back,most will think i am being rude.
This is why religion has to come up.
For merry Christmas what about. "And the same to you" as I understand happy holidays is not a good substitute
If it's a birthday, can you say "are you having a great day so far?", such as you arrive at home of a partially verbal child...
Hi Ms. Smart nurse, it's my birthday!
Are you having a great day today?
Birthdays are a non issue for meas I can barely remember my own and my child's.
Can you substitute compliments for birthdays, such as "you look so big today, my how much you have grown"
As far as revealing your high functioning autism, why would you? It's no ones business but yours and your personal healthcare team.
Things I reveal
I live in XX county
I like science
I'm involved in scouting (many of my patients or siblings are Boy or Girl Scouts)
I have two adopted dogs, one special needs.
I'm allergic to cats
I hate water other than showers but I will accompany their child in water therapy or other water activity if that is what the patient likes
I do reveal that I have a special needs child,if asked, as when I take my own child to appointments or therapy, I often see patients/families since there is only one pediatric care center for 3 counties. But I do not volunteer the info. I don't permit client managers to release that either as some think it will make families more receptive to me as a new nurse.
Oh ok...wasn't sure what you meant by that...I guess it is your choice to bring it up...if a Jewish person wished me a happy (insert Jewish holiday here) that I do not celebrate...I would be offended...If I know they celebrate it I would just wish it to them back...
Acknowledging that something exists does not mean you are complicit with it...I don't understand why you can't wish someone a happy birthday. Maybe you can't "celebrate" with them. But not even use a cultural nicety?
In 3 words I can sum up what I've learned about life: it goes on.
Adele_Michal7, ASN, RN
893 Posts
I have my FB name as a modified alias of my real name, due to a few parents crossing boundaries in the past. It is easier if parents can not find me on FB, rather than having the find me and friend request me.
I strive to not share personal info but I struggle with that. If I'm gonna work in your home for 8 hours I'd like to have a good rapport. It is a tough balance, at least I have found it to be.