Graduate Nurses vs Experienced Nurses
1. A Graduate Nurse throws up when the patient does.
An experienced nurse calls housekeeping when a patient throws up.
2. A Graduate Nurse has so many pins on their name badge you can't read it.
An experienced nurse doesn't wear a name badge for liability reasons.
3. A Graduate Nurse charts too much.
An experienced nurse doesn't chart enough.
4. A Graduate Nurse loves to run to codes.
An experienced nurse makes graduate nurses run to codes.
5. A Graduate Nurse wants everyone to know they are a nurse.
An experienced nurse doesn't want anyone to know they are a nurse.
6. A Graduate Nurse keeps detailed notes on a pad.
An experienced nurse writes on the back of their hand, paper scraps, napkins, etc.
7. A Graduate Nurse will spend all day trying to reorient a patient.
An experienced nurse will chart the patient is disoriented and restrain them
8. A Graduate Nurse can hear a beeping I-med at 50 yards.
An experienced nurse can't hear any alarms at any distance.
9. A Graduate Nurse loves to hear abnormal heart and breath sounds.
An experienced nurse doesn't want to know about them unless the patient is symptomatic.
10. A Graduate Nurse spends 2 hours giving a patient a bath.
An experienced nurse lets the CNA give the patient a bath.
11. A Graduate Nurse thinks people respect Nurses.
An experienced nurse knows everybody blames everything on the nurse.
12. A Graduate Nurse looks for blood on a bandage hoping they will get to change it.
An experienced nurse knows a little blood never hurt anybody.
13. A Graduate Nurse looks for a chance "to work with the family"
An experienced nurse avoids the family.
14. A Graduate Nurse expects meds and supplies to be delivered on time.
An experienced nurse expects them to never be delivered at all.
15. A Graduate Nurse will spend days bladder training an incontinent patient.
An experienced nurse will insert a Foley catheter.
16. A Graduate Nurse always answers their phone.
An experienced nurse checks their caller ID before answering the phone.
17. A Graduate Nurse thinks psych patients are interesting.
An experienced nurse thinks psych patients are crazy.
18. A Graduate Nurse carries reference books in their bag.
An experienced nurse carries magazines, lunch, and some "cough syrup" in their bag.
19. A Graduate Nurse doesn't find this funny.
An experienced nurse does.
Hope you enjoy it!
When I do my spontaneous routines at local bars, I poke fun at myself and my family - and many a time, I don't have to make stuff up. You should see me doing impressions of my brother or my father 
madwife2002, BSN, RN
26 Articles; 4,777 Posts
You know the way I read it was, when you first Graduate you do everything with enthusiasm and try to see and do everything but the more experience you have you become less enthusiastic and dont need to prove yourself and no longer want to see and do everything not as somebody stated about eating their young.