Is making friends in school important?

BacktotheBeach, ADN, BSN, RN · May 25, 2011

I think the small group of friends I have made in nursing school has helped me tremendously! Moral support is great, someone to commiserate and celebrate with! I don't really study with this group, but we do share helpful tips all the time. We are finishing our first year and it has turned into a really tight friendship.

I am an 'older' student, haha, and I did not expect to make friends. I thought I would just go in there and work hard with my head down! I wouldn't trade these girls for anything in the world. I seriously don't think I could continue without my support group.

JBMmom, MSN, NP · May 25, 2011

I'm half way through my program and I doubt I've met anyone that I'll ever see again after graduation. I don't dislike them, but I'm not in school for friends and we're friendly enough because of proximity, but that's about it. I don't generally study in groups and I've gotten along very well with my classmates in clinical settings. I don't think that friends have a make or break for nursing school, but I know for many it's very important.

Lovely_RN, MSN · May 25, 2011

I wasn't seeking friends but I made a few and still speak to some of my classmates. It's been nice for networking purposes; we trade information about job openings or educational opportunities for the most part.

healthstar, BSN, RN · May 25, 2011

I like my college friends more than the friends I've known for so many years. I think this is because we are studying the same thing and we have more things in common. I can't talk to non-nursing major friends about nursing bc they will get bored and will not understand how busy I am. When I am in school I barely see my non-nursing major friends. You can always keep school friends and family friends separated.I think it is very important to make friends in college, it doesn't hurt you.

allnurses Guide · May 25, 2011

No.

But I do feel it's important to be friendly and supportive.

caliotter3 · May 25, 2011

Making friends is always important in any facet of life. You never know when you can help each other. My daughter made friends in nursing school. Know what they were doing besides study groups? Helping each other get jobs at their respective places of employment, that's what. There is a proverb in the Bible about walking with another so that if you fall, your buddy is there to pick you up. When you walk alone, there is no one there to pick you up when you fall.

Trauma Columnist · May 25, 2011

Not necessary.

I was an older student with family also - I don't remember anyone's name; student or teacher.

CT Pixie, BSN, RN · May 25, 2011

During my LPN schooling I was friendly with most of the class but not what I'd consider "friends" with them. Only keep in contact with a few of them via Facebook etc. but we don't call each other, text or go out. We do give the other a heads up on possible job opening etc..but not much more than that.

Now, this time around (doing the LPN to RN) I've made a friend in each pre-req class I've taken. We just clicked and became friends outside of class. It helped in the sense that I had no qualms about calling/texting if I had a question about the reading, homework etc..or if I was going to be out and to ask them to fill me in on what I missed, loan me their notes etc and they did the same with me. It went from being friendly..to being friends. I talk with and go out with those friends even though the class has ended.

Does it give me an "edge"..I don't think so but its nice (in my opinion) to make new buds :)

emtbtofuturenurse · May 25, 2011

I've found that making friends within nursing school has helped my sanity!

Without the friendships I've been developing, I don't think I would have been able to survive through my first year. I would attempt to talk to family but they didn't really understand what I was going through.

We all tend to study alone at first but a few days before the exam we all get together and bounce NCLEX questions off of each other. It's incredible how much I've learned just by listening to the rational of other students.

I would just say don't go into nursing school with the expectation that you have to do everything alone. Make friends so when you have the stressful day in clinicals or exam that didn't go just right- you have someone there next to you to provide additional support.

JRP1120, RN · May 25, 2011

I will say here only my thoughts, opinions and experiences as I'm sure there are many others with differing opinions and experiences. While in college taking my pre-nursing classes, I formed some friendships with ladies I had the same classes with probably because we had the same goals or were on the same track (nursing school being the goal). While I didn't necessarily seek out friendships, I am a bubbly type personality and love meeting new people, etc..., so it was a natural feel for me to be friendly and talkative to others. However, am I still actual friends with any of them? I, like most people, lost track of most of those ladies as some of our college goals changed, life got in the way, etc...and some I keep in contact with every now and then. But what defines a friendship? In pre-nursing we had the same goals (to get to nursing school and to pass the classes). I think the like-mindedness alone brought most of us together at that time and as I said, then things change and people move on.

On to nursing school-I just graduated in May and spent two yrs with pretty much the same 70+ people sometimes on a daily basis. Did I form friendships? You bet! I found nursing school to be quite different than my pre-nursing classes, as many do of course. You all are on the same path with the same goal-to pass and graduate! Did I know all 70+ people personally? Nope but I knew their faces and had plenty of positive exchanges with many of them in the duration. For me, my class became my family. We did hard time together, we cheered each other on, we were saddened each time we lost one, etc...I didn't go into nursing school to seek out friendships but did I make some close friends? Yes I did :) People have a tendency to form groups of likeness and begin hanging out, studying together, etc...when going through tough things like NS. Yes, you have your cliques, some not so nice but they're there. I try to always give everyone the benefit of the doubt cuz that's how I was brought up and I've been stung many a time because of it too but because of who I am, I haven't let it stop me from being friendly to others or let it discourage me from making friends while in school. We had a few "loners" in our class and they all passed and graduated too. So I think it's just personal preference as to whether or not it's important to make "friends" during NS or not. I made 4 of the closest friends ever during our two yrs together and I wouldn't trade any of it for anything. At the same time, I realize that a lot of people feel the camaraderie with one another while in NS but have no real intentions of actually remaining friends once out of school. For me, true friendship is important and once I've made those connections, I have a hard time letting go (i.e. I want to remain friends or think we are going to but the other person is different and doesn't feel the same way). My little circle of the 5 of us were tight during class, clinical, precepting, etc...we shared many joys and triumphs with one another, as well as some heart breaks, let-downs and sadness, in and outside of NS. To me, those are the things that can make friendship real-truly giving of oneself for the betterment of the other. But sadly, I have newly discovered that the other 4 peeps I held dear to me, don't feel the same way. I have had my heart broken and feelings hurt numerous times since being out of NS through circumstances I've experienced with them. I have found that, sadly, these ladies are more like the majority of people in general that take, take, take and refuse to give, love others more than themselves, and are really just intolerant of other people's differences. As NS was winding down, I began to see things in them I was shocked at (back-biting, talking behind others backs, sarcasm, sarcasm, sarcasm, making fun of others, laughing at others, etc...). Yes, NS, especially the end, is more stressful than anything, but I was shocked to see the transformation in these women take place, to a point that I knew I wasn't like them anymore and really didn't think I wanted to be around them anymore. We took a trip together after NS which opened my eyes wider and then stayed together in a house for an NCLEX review week we had and that's when I decided that these were indeed NOT the true friendships I thought we had all through NS. I'm still hurt but I move on. I am not a perfect person by any means; however, I was always taught to be the friend you want to have, treat others as you wish to be treated. I can look back and truly say I was those things to these women but the outcome is not what I thought it was going to be. A lot of it is just the fact we're women-women have the tendency to be catty to one another; that's just the nature of women sometimes. With all of that being said (sorry to have rambled), I still wouldn't trade it for anything. With each year that I get older, I learn new things about myself and other people I associate with. I have chalked it all up to a really good learning experience. I see that I let myself get too close, too invested in those "friends" however, I do believe that we did help keep each other sane and going during NS when at times each one of us was weak, or wanting to give up. Will I make friends in my nursing jobs in the future? Maybe, but never to that degree-I won't allow myself. Does that mean I've changed my beliefs or who I am? Nope. I do believe that people come into our lives for a reason and a season. The reasons and the season of NS is over for now. It's time to move on and continue to experience the ups and downs of the people I'll meet and befriend, but I will still always try to treat others the way I wish to be treated.

Again, this is just part of my experiences, thoughts and opinions. In a nutshell, you will gravitate toward likemindedness with others while in NS because that's just how NS is-tough, and getting thru it with others going thru the same toughness somehow makes it easier (and I know there are plenty out there that have gotten thru without any closeness to anyone else in their class and that's cool too :) ).

Good luck in NS!

leenak · May 25, 2011

I figure networking is important. You never know who may be able to connect to for a future job opportunity.