Do you think that making friends in your classes is important? Do you think it gives you an "edge" over those who do not make friends in class? What are the advantages/disadvantages (if any)?
I have never really sought out friendships in college. I've just focused on the class and studied alone (unless I had a friend from outside of school who was also taking the class, which has happened). I have been sort of jumping around in college, first pursuing dental hygiene, then computer science, now pre-nursing. Is the need to develop relationships in class greater in nursing school than in other classes? In dental hygiene, I had many of my classes with the same people but still never really formed any friendships. I don't think it affected my success in any way and did not contribute to my choice to pursue something different.
Even though I'm pre-nursing, I posted in this section because I want to hear from those of you who are already in nursing school.
I don't know why but for some reason this question makes me sad. Friends are important in every aspect of life, school, church, work, etc. I think it would be sad if someone didn't have friends in NS. You spend so much time with these people... and nursing is team work. You need to learn to lean on others and allow others to lean on you, for support, comfort, to vent, to learn new things, and teach new things. When you get in the field most likely your nursing career isn't going to be a "one man show." Might as well start learning to make friends and work as a team in a learning environment before you get thrown in the fire. :)
I'm friendly with most of my classmates, and closer to some who share the same interests as me. I anticipate I will work with some of them in the same department, so it's important to me to be friendly with my classmates.
I don't care about making friends in college. In pre-requisite classes, I don't think I made one single friend. In nursing school, well, automatically you become friends for spending that much time together. I didn't worry about making life-long friend there either. I have always been friendly, nice, helpful to my classmates, the same they were to me. But, I didn't become very close with anybody. I like them, but I wouldn't care less if I wouldn't see them for the rest of my life.
I was slow to make friends while I was in school. This wasn't because I wanted to be a snob but because I wanted to avoid those who had a tendency to cause drama, be ultra competitive, or were more into partying than studying. By the end of my first year I had a pretty good idea of who would be "healthy" to hang out with. I became close to a small group of friends and we supported each other throughout school and beyond. Nursing school is pretty rigorous and friends can either hold you up or hold ya back. Remember that you're in school for an education, don't lose site of your goals, and choose friends that will be a support in the end.
For me it is. I've met some really nice folks since I've started nursing school. They understand me when my non nursing friends don't. I like that. Nursing school can be tough and a roller coaster of emotions. Its nice to have people that can relate. I've seen tears,anger and frustration in my program. I've seen people hug and uplift each other.
As an adult learner, my focus was always go to school and just do what needs to be done. Well, no reason I can't do that and make friends along the way. It doesn't give me an edge, but it sure makes the roller coaster ride of nursing school a little bit more easier for me as far as dealing with the stress and emotions.
I don't know why but for some reason this question makes me sad. Friends are important in every aspect of life, school, church, work, etc. I think it would be sad if someone didn't have friends in NS. You spend so much time with these people... and nursing is team work. You need to learn to lean on others and allow others to lean on you, for support, comfort, to vent, to learn new things, and teach new things. When you get in the field most likely your nursing career isn't going to be a "one man show." Might as well start learning to make friends and work as a team in a learning environment before you get thrown in the fire. :)
I don't think anyone said that there was an inability to make friends or work as a team.
Thank you to everyone who has shared their thoughts so far. It seems like a mix of opinions on the subject.
To respond directly to Samantha79- my current job is in management and because I both work and go to school full time (for now) those are my only two outlets for forging friendships. I do have some social life but clearly with both of the above and family obligations it is limited. Because I manage almost every person I work directly with, it is difficult to make friends at work. This is in part because it is difficult to tell whether an employee is just trying to use me to get something they want, and also because I have to be careful to keep things professional between myself and my employees both in and outside of work. I work for a company which hires many seasonal employees, and after being there for so long and seeing people come and go I've found that it has really affected my take on friendship. Every relationship seems transient. I also have to separate my personal feelings about someone from the job, and it's hard to toggle between being a friend and being a boss. I agree that it is a sad place to be in.
Ideally, I would like to make friends in school for many of the reasons you all have pointed out- mostly having a support system and someone who can relate to your experiences. However, it's comforting to know that if the friendships don't happen naturally I won't be totally sabotaged!
I got my first degree with a several kids I went to high school with, and really can't say that I gained a lot more friendships beyond that. Enough time has passed since then that I can't even remember people from college. Now, I'm in school again. I'll talk to people in class, but I don't ever see or hear from them outside of class.
I am married, I'm a stay at home Dad to 3 young kids. I also work 2 part time jobs and go to nursing school. The last thing I thought I would ever do is make friends or have time for them. I have to say, I never could have gotten through the last 2 semesters without the friends I've made. 4 students in particular. We are all similar ages (late 20s), married with kids. We study together constantly and we all support one another. I feel fortunate to have made such wonderful amazing friends. We dont talk much out of class, but during the semester we are together constantly.
Specializes in Med/Surg, Surgical Post-Trauma, Peds.
I really think that making friends in nursing school is a big thing! I have been trying to get through the prereqs for my LVN-RN/BSN and then my plan was to go to ISU for their distance program and I am thinking twice about it. I think that having a support system and being around other students who are doing the program with you.
I am still close to a few of my classmates from my LVN program. It has been 10 years!
I don't think anyone said that there was an inability to make friends or work as a team.
I'm sure we all know how to do both.
Dry your tears.
I wasn't suggesting that anyone had an inability to make friends. In my opinion it's sad that the question even has to be asked. Why wouldn't people want friends in every aspect of their life? It seems strange to me that someone would have friends in other areas but then decide that they don't want any friends at school. I'm not saying you (or anybody else) is strange if they want to be the loner type, I'm just saying it's a strange thought process to ME.
OP: I have been in management before as well and understand having to maintain a professional relationship with your employees, and it does often require that you actually NOT be friends. In pre-reqs I would say that I didn't really make friends because I took them at a local CC. They were one class at a time one day a week with totally different people in every class, so you don't really have the time to build those relationships. NS isn't like that. You are with the same people ALL the time. It is just natural that people would become friends in that environment. Since you are limited at work, I think NS would be a great place to have that outlet and share your experience with other students. If you want to make friends I'm sure you won't have any trouble. Don't worry about sabotaging it.
Specializes in Emergency Dept. Trauma. Pediatrics.
I don't think it gives you any sort of edge and I don't think you should go in thinking "Ok that one there, I will make her my friend." But I don't think it would hurt you at all. I had many friendly associates in nursing school and I made 2 life long friends, I would consider them my best friends. We have been a huge support to each other through many things that happened in our lives during school.
I can't imagine looking back how I would have made it through without them. It's nice because they know exactly what I went through. They will know exactly what it's like to be a new grad nurse, but our friendship has grown far beyond nursing. One of them is taking me to my eye surgery tomorrow. It's been a long time since I had friends I was this close to and I love these 2 girls. I guarantee that in 20 years, we will still be in contact.
I didn't go into nursing school looking to make "new best friends" but I am forever grateful I made them.
As far as more associate friends while in nursing school, that doesn't hurt either. I am polite and respectful and nice to everyone, if they are the same to me. I had a wonderful experience in nursing school and I think a lot of it was from the friendly atmosphere I had with most of my classmates.
That said there are about 4 I pray to never see again and I cringe at the thought of them working in a hospital!
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Samantha79
166 Posts
I don't know why but for some reason this question makes me sad. Friends are important in every aspect of life, school, church, work, etc. I think it would be sad if someone didn't have friends in NS. You spend so much time with these people... and nursing is team work. You need to learn to lean on others and allow others to lean on you, for support, comfort, to vent, to learn new things, and teach new things. When you get in the field most likely your nursing career isn't going to be a "one man show." Might as well start learning to make friends and work as a team in a learning environment before you get thrown in the fire. :)