What do you think about dating your coworkers?

Nurses General Nursing

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I was just curous what everyone thinks about dating a coworker. I'm not interested in doing it because I have a steady boyfriend. Where I work several people are married to each other. There have also been some big breakups where they no longer speak to one another and is now affecting the delivery of quality care of our pts.

I don't think I would reccommend it!! Lots of conflicting and awkward situations could happen -- HOWEVER (ever the optimist) it could be a great support and encouragement --

I am tickled to death with my big ol' hubby who thinks that my "nurse stuff" is "gross" and wouldn't trade him for anything!!!! (Unless of course the guy at work was incredibly gorgeous, incredibly wealthy, incredibly sensative and incredibly perfect!-----JUST KIDDING!!!!!!):rolleyes:

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~~~Women need a reason to have sex.......men just need a place.~~~

I guess you don't know very meny good men do you?

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Specializes in 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER.
~~~Women need a reason to have sex.......men just need a place.~~~

I guess you don't know very meny good men do you?

Perhaps she has a sense of humor.

Anyway, the maturity of both people involved in the relationship is the factor on how well it's handled.

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Met and married while working in the same hospital, often the same Unit, nearly 27 years ago so I can't say it doesn't work but Like Teeituptom if I tried to date any one at work now death would be very slow and painful.

I have also seen too many complications and problems from work place romances; not every one is like us.

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Specializes in MS Home Health.

I did date someone I work with. Now we are married but no longer work together. I left the company after the relationship was present.

renerian :wink2:

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Specializes in Critical Care, ER.
I did date someone I work with. Now we are married but no longer work together. I left the company after the relationship was present.

renerian :wink2:

Me too. It sort of hurt my career, though. :o

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It sure can complicate things can't it...dating someone we work with...it is also uncomfortable when the folks around you are having affairs AND married. Specially if we know the spouses.

Personally I prefer a professional workplace where the silliness, flirting and sexual attraction is saved for AFTER work. And I don't like to hear talk and gossip about personal lives of coworkers. It just leads to trouble too many times. Best to keep your personal life at home and stick to professional stuff at work, in my experience. I keep my workplace chitchat to a minimum when it comes to my personal life. These people are not necessarily your friends...I've learned that the hard way. ;)

Not to say it can't be done, but it depends on the maturity of EVERYONE involved and that seldom can be assured.

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Specializes in Corrections, Psych, Med-Surg.

Risky.

Equally risky is NOT dating someone who might have turned out to be a (or THE, for those who believe such things) suitable partner.

You pays your money and you takes your choice.

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Specializes in psych, medical, drug rehab.

:uhoh3:

I would defintely say it is very risky. It was always my policy NEVER to date someone I worked with. However, I broke my own rule a few years back when I moved into a new city and a new area of nursing. I dated a co worker who eventually cheated on me with a Doctor from the same unit. It was a fiasco and to this day I am ashamed to have been involved with a scenario like this.It was a very painful period for me and the situation was surrounded by gossip. It affected my career negatively because I felt compelled to leave my position and took anything available to do so.As a result of not really evaluating my options thoroughly I jumped into a position I was not well suited for.

Well, it has been 7 years since that time period and I am happily involved with a person who is into a totally different career track and in looking back I can defintely say that during that time period I experienced a "major spiritual/emotional growth spurt". LOL... but WOW... I would never knowingly do that again!

However, I have heard of other nurses that work, travel etc together and I think it can be a wonderful experience if you are professional while at work.

So I guess my bottom line is tread carefully, be professional and always pray for wisdom and good judgement.

Namaste

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Specializes in Tele/ICU/MedSurg/Peds/SubAcute/LTC/Alz.

Aww this forum skipped a beat. I really messed up... :o Dated someone at work, that another coworker hooked me up with... The coworker became the problem... Ugggg... :angryfire And people started talking because of the flirting someone was talking about... Talk about learning the hard way...

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Whenever I hear this question, I think of a great line from the movie, "Moonstruck." The character played by Olympia Dukakis quipped about workplace romances: "Don't sh** where you eat." Seemed to sum it up fairly nicely.

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Specializes in ER/ MEDICAL ICU / CCU/OB-GYN /CORRECTION.

Different unit or shift with different managers I see no harm ...

Same unit coworkers dating -- harm to you and your fellow person dating and coworkers patients has high potential risk

Supervisor role involved when dating a subordinate -- legal harm as well as eithical questions are abound.

I have worked where a supervisor dated a collegue even though they kept it "professional" it was professionally uncomfortable several times for others.

I feel in this situation even if the most strident attempts are made all are definately harmed regardless of outcome.

Anyone in a supervisor role dating an subordinate needs not to be a supervisor and for sure needs a good therapist and perhaps will need a lawyer.

A therapist

1)to look at the need for inappropriate power over someone in an "equal relationship" /

2)to look for areas of boundry setting personally and professionally/

3) to look at the need to triangulate job dating and self and why this person you supervise,

3)the inabitlity to see the potential for sef destruction.

a lawyer for

1) potential sex harassement real or imagined if break up that can follow this relationship

2) others co workers complaining of favoritism or hostile work enviroment

3) when management finds out I do believe this could very much be grounds for demotion/reassignment or even termination for lack of descretion in a leadership role.

Perhaps one can not control the heart however one can control the behaviours that will affect those they lead and what they contribute to the work enviroment emotionally and the eventual trickle down to the patients we serve

Marc

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