Time off for Funerals???

Nurses General Nursing

Published

Specializes in Pediatric/Adolescent, Med-Surg.

So I got an e-mail from a co-worker today asking me if I would be able to work for her so she can attend her in-laws funeral. I found the whole concept strange, as everywhere else I have ever worked if a relative (by blood or by marriage) died, you could either use FMLA or you were automatically granted 3 days off as some sort of "grieving days." Has anyone ever heard of staff having to find their own replacements in order to attend funerals???

Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

Now a days....sadly...yes. Many facilities allow for immediate family only and in laws don't count. To apply for FLMA for 3 days seems excessive to me, by the time the aper work is filled out and approved.....the funeral is over. Manyt places now a days say....you want it off? get coverage......it's just heartless.

That is a workplace I would leave as soon as possible. They have no respect for employees and unreasonable expectations.

Yes, it's hard. Since the late 80's, around here I guess unless you work for a small place, it's been only 1st relation. Spouse, child, mom, dad, sister, brother. That's it. I have a cousin in TX who I fear is ending her forever fight with cancer. I am already feeling my heart beat all the faster with the anxiety.

Specializes in Pediatric/Adolescent, Med-Surg.

Wow, maybe I just worked for good companies/managers before but I almost wondered if she was trying to pull a fast one as I could never dream of finding my own replacement for a funeral. My family lives 500 miles away so if anything were to happen to them I would be driving/flying home and asking questions later.

Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.

several years ago, a beloved aunt died and her funeral was scheduled for monday. i told my manager that i would need to take that day off as one of my three "personal" days allotted per year. that was

thursday morning. she said if i took the day off, i didn't need to bother coming to work tuesday night for my next scheduled shift. i repeated what she had said and she verified it.

i went to the funeral as scheduled. since i had been told i would no longer have a job if i went, i stayed home tuesday night. about an hour into the shift, the phone rang. my manager wanted to know

where the $%&& i was. when i repeated what she'd said, she replied that she hadn't meant it and i just should have known it. guess which one of us still had a job by the end of the year??

Specializes in PICU, Sedation/Radiology, PACU.

Our policy for days off for greiving only includes immediate family- spouse, children, siblings and parents. Other than that, you can use PTO to take the time off ot find someone to switch a shift.

Some facilities don't offer automatic time off for death of a family member at all. It's up to the employee to find someone to cover the shifts.

Specializes in CMSRN.

If I needed a day/or two off for grieving I would take it without worrying about a replacement.

Granting just for immediate family is silly. (Some companies say that immediate family is defined by the individual. ex: Best friend is closer family than parent)

I agree that using PTO makes sense but not necessarily to finding your own replacement.

If my spouse, kids or even my mother passed it would be greater than 2-3 days off I would need to grieve and/or settle things. I would be a basket case and need to take some time off.

Specializes in geriatrics, IV, Nurse management.

Sadly, my facility is the same way. My co-workers husband's grandmother died, and they had to find someone to cover their shifts because it isn't immediate family. I worked for her. Who knows, in the future I may need the shift coverage?:)

Specializes in Med/Surg, Academics.
Our policy for days off for greiving only includes immediate family- spouse, children, siblings and parents. Other than that, you can use PTO to take the time off ot find someone to switch a shift.

Out of curiosity, how much time is given for a spouse or children?

ETA: The reason I ask is that at my old company (non healthcare), the managers had an unwritten rule to give as much time "as needed." One of my coworkers took a month off after her husband died suddenly. He died at his own father's funeral.

Back in the mid 80s, I worked somewhere that asked the employee to bring in a COPY OF THE NEWSPAPER OBITUARY in order to get funeral time...... I thought that was so inexcusable..... JMHO :D

Specializes in Pediatric/Adolescent, Med-Surg.
Back in the mid 80s, I worked somewhere that asked the employee to bring in a COPY OF THE NEWSPAPER OBITUARY in order to get funeral time...... I thought that was so inexcusable..... JMHO :D

Um wow. Yes Someday I'll be busy flying home, planning a funeral, helping take care of my parents estate, and oh right forgot to mail my employer the obit to prove this is for real. Unreal.

+ Add a Comment